Q. What does HMO stand for? Maternity Hospital: An heirport - Daffynitions joe-ks.com Time is generally the best doctor. - Ovid Surgery is the cry of defeat in medicine. - Martin H. Fischer The No. 1 cause of bankruptcies is medical bills. - Michael Moore Three out of four doctors recommend another doctor. - Graffito A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running. - Groucho Marx A nurse will always give us hope, an angel with a stethoscope. - Terri Guillemets Document: Repeating what your Doctor told you in your own words - Daffynitions joe-ks.com I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body. - Winston Bennett Operation: A surgical job taking minutes to do and years to describe - Daffynitions joe-ks.com You couldn't tell if she was dressed for an opera or an operation. - Irvin S Cobb My doctor told me to watch my drinking. Now I drink in front of a mirror. - Rodney Dangerfield The best way to reduce the cost of medical care is to reduce the illness. - Arlen Specter A good laugh and a long sleep are the best cures in the Doctor's book. - Irish Proverb A hospital should also have a recovery room adjoining the cashier's office. - Francis O'Walsh There is nothing so strong or safe in an emergency of life as the simple truth. - Charles Dickens Oh, when I was a kid, I was ugly. When I was born, the doctor smacked my mother. - Rodney Dangerfield The best doctors in the world are Doctor Diet, Doctor Quiet, and Doctor Merryman. - Jonathan Swift First the Doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me. - Steve Martin Co-Operation: An exchange between a woman and a man in which she coos and he operates - Daffynitions joe-ks.com People pay the doctor for his trouble; for his kindness they still remain in his debt. - Seneca I'm not feeling very well - I need a doctor immediately. Ring the nearest golf course. - Groucho Marx A doctor can bury his mistakes but an architect can only advise his clients to plant vines. - Frank Lloyd Wright I've just become a pensioner so I've started saving up for my own hospital trolley. - Tom Baker I wonder why you can always read a Doctor's bill but you can never read his prescription. - Finley Peter Dunne I have had my television aerials removed. It is the moral equivalent of a prostate operation. - Malcolm Muggeridge Constant attention by a good nurse may be just as important as a major operation by a surgeon. - Dag Hammarskjold I wondher why ye can always read a doctor's bill an' ye niver can read his purscription. - Finley Peter Dunne The Christian's Bible is a drug store. Its contents remain the same, but the medical practice changes. - Mark Twain The road to medical knowledge is through the pathological museum and not through an apothecary's shop. - William Withey Gull If my doctor told me I had only six minutes to live, I wouldn't brood, I'd just type a little faster. - Isaac Asimov Faith is a fine invention When Gentlemen can see - But Microscopes are prudent In an Emergency. - Emily Dickinson In the sick room, ten cents' worth of human understanding equals ten dollars' worth of medical science. - Martin H. Fischer It is astonishing with how little reading a doctor can practice medicine, but is not astonishing how badly he may do it. - William Osler I'm planning to adopt a dog soon. It wasn't my first choice but my Doctor told me I can't have any biologically. - Bill Murray It is reasonable to expect the doctor to recognize that science may not have all the answers to problems of health and healing. - Norman Cousins I've got a great doctor. He gave a guy six months to live. They couldn't pay his bill so he gave him another six months. - Henny Youngman Once in your life you need a doctor, a lawyer, a policeman, and a preacher... but every day, three times a day, you need a farmer. - Brenda Schaepp Paul Revere was warning the British about gun control, and George Washington apparently was crossing the Delaware to bomb an abortion clinic. - Bill Maher The best way to meet a woman is in an emergency situation - if you're in a shipwreck, or you find yourself behind enemy lines, or in a flood. - Mark Helprin see also Doctor & Medical Sections HMO Judgment Day New Medic Alert Bracelet |
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