On Top Of Things

Grandfathers don’t know everything!


Little Johnny was 4 years old and was staying with his grandfather for a few days.

He’d been playing outside with the other kids, when he came into the house and asked , “Grandpa, what’s that called when two people sleep in the same bedroom and one is on top of the other?”

His Grandpa was a little taken aback, but he decided to tell him the truth. “Well, Little Johnny, it’s called sexual intercourse.”

“Oh, OK” Little Little Johnny said, and he went back outside to play with the other kids.

A few minutes later he came back in and angrily said, “Grandpa, it isn’t called sexual intercourse, it’s called Bunk Beds. And Jimmy’s mom wants to talk to you.”


QuotaBills
I do. That is character! - Theodore Roosevelt

A rich man has no need of character. - Hebrew Proverb

Character is much easier kept than recovered. - Thomas Paine

The great hope of society is individual character. - William Ellery Channing

Humor is the affectionate communication of insight. - Leo Rosten

I put hardwood floors on top of wall-to-wall carpet. - Steven Wright

Never trust a husband too far, nor a bachelor too near. - Helen Rowland

A bachelor is a guy who never made the same mistake once. - Phyllis Diller

The real character of a man is found out by his amusements. - Joshua Reynolds

Persistence is to the character of man as carbon is to steel. - Napoleon Hill

In my last movie I played an unsympathetic character - myself. - Oscar Levant

Nothing shows a man's character more than what he laughs at. - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

A bachelor is one who enjoys the chase but does not eat the game. - Unknown

It is of little traits that the greatest human character is composed. - William Winter

Ability can take you to the top, but it takes character to keep you there. - Zig Ziglar

Sometimes the best communication happens when you're on separate bikes. - Unknown

The world may take your reputation from you, but it cannot take your character. - Emma Dunham Kelley

Don't confuse fame with success. Madonna is one; Helen Keller is the other. - Erma Bombeck

John Wooden was a hall of fame character long before he was a hall of fame coach. - John C Maxwell

You can tell a lot about a fellow's character by his way of eating jellybeans. - Ronald Reagan

Peppering your relationship with a dash of mystery can make it far more palatable. - Khang K. Nguyen

Actions, looks, words and steps form the alphabet by which you may spell character. - Johann Kasper Lavater

He is useless on top of the ground; he ought to be under it, inspiring the cabbages. - Mark Twain

The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place. - George Bernard Shaw

As long as I can wear a wig I can be any character, and in real life I can be myself. - Ginnifer Goodwin

Love and respect are the most important aspects of parenting, and of all relationships. - Jodie Foster

Any disaster you can survive is an improvement in your character, your stature, and your life. - Joseph Campbell

Great acting is being able to create a character. Great character is being able to be yourself. - John Leguizamo

If a man's character is to be abused, there's nobody like a relative to do the business. - Alexander Pope

Character is that which reveals moral purposes, exposing the class of things man chooses or avoids. - Aristotle

I have a great relationship with the blacks. I've always had a great relationship with the blacks. - Donald Trump

Remember that your best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other. - Unknown

Pigeons are gentle and smart and have complex social relationships. Their hearing and vision are both excellent. - Ingrid Newkirk

When lying and omission become part of your character, you lose integrity and the trust you once had from others. - Theodore W Fedorchak

A dinosaur out of context is like a character without a story. Worse than that, the character suffers from amnesia. - Jack Horner

Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain but it takes character and self control to be understanding and forgiving. - Dale Carnegie

When anyone asks me about the Irish character, I say look at the trees. Maimed, stark and misshapen, but ferociously tenacious. - Unknown

The five essential entrepreneurial skills for success: Concentration, Discrimination, Organization, Innovation and Communication. - Harold S Geneen

Never design your character like a garden where anyone can walk. Design your character like the sky where everyone's desire is to reach. - Unknown

I not only knew Houdini, but we had a very lovely relationship. I really though we had something going, and then the son of a gun disappeared. - Betty White


see also   Family,  Language  &  Little Johnny  Sections

 

Barking Up The Wrong Tree

Indiana Bones

Raxe

Halloween Horse

Holding His Own Portraits

Kung Fu Driver

Ford Quadricycle

Redneck Hayride

Ice Boat

Atom Trust

Electricity Storage

Be Patient

Can Never Have Too Many Tools

Roller Blade Heels

Pedal Car Mechanic
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27-Oct-2020