Bat House

Bird House: Home Tweet Home. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A full mind is an empty baseball bat. - Branch Rickey

There will be no whitewash at the White House. - Richard M Nixon

Choose your neighbor before you buy your house. - African Proverb

He'd go through the house like Typhoon Mary. - Archie Bunker

One aged man - one man - can't fill a house. - Robert Frost

The ornament of a house is the friends who frequent it. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Better a hundred enemies outside the house than one inside. - Arabic proverb

He taught me housekeeping; when I divorce I keep the house. - Zsa Zsa Gabor

I can't clean house and save the world at the same time. - Unknown

I have so much hair, I have a separate wig closet in my house. - Sherri Shepherd

My wife is such a bad cook, in my house we pray after the meal. - Rodney Dangerfield

Go often to the house of a friend, for weeds choke the unused path. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Every bathroom in my house will ultimately have a Toto bidet in it. - Ken Marino

At worst, a house unkept cannot be so distressing as a life unlived. - Rose Macaulay

I will clean house when Sears comes out with a riding vacuum cleaner. - Roseanne Barr

I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man, I keep his house. - Zsa Zsa Gabor

In the haunted house of life, art is the only stair that doesn't creak. - Tom Robbins

Census Taker: A man who goes from house to house increasing the population. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I wanted a man who wouldn't stray so I'm dating a guy on house arrest. - Kim Bove

I went to a haunted house, looked under the kitchen table, and found spirit gum. - Steven Wright

I love contemporary art, although I wouldn't want a pickled shark in my house. - Bruno Tonioli

Do you know what White House correspondents call actors who pose as reporters? Anchors. - Jay Leno

If you burn your neighbor's house down, it doesn't make your house look any better. - Lou Holtz

Maybe I'd like to run around the house in my drawers, and with her here, I felt inhabited. - Archie Bunker

Crafting fills my life, and my closets, and my drawers, and every empty tote bag in the house. - Unknown

Without my pets, my wallet would be full, my house would be clean, but my heart would be empty. - Unknown

You need a plan to build a house. To build a life, it is even more important to have a plan or goal. - Zig Ziglar

Fang can't stand to see trash & garbage lying around the house. He can't stand the competition. - Phyllis Diller

In France we leave unmolested those who set fire to the house, and persecute those who sound the alarm. - Sebastien Chamfort

Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you can never tell. - Joan Crawford

Window Screen: 1. A device to prevent the escape of insects; 2. A device for keeping flies in the house. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Ancient Rome declined because it had a Senate.
What's going to happen to us with both a Senate and a House? - Will Rogers

There's nothing to match curling up with a good book when there's a repair job to be done around the house. - Joe Ryan

A little House well fill'd, a little Field well till'd, and a little Wife well will'd, are great Riches. - Benjamin Franklin

Every woman's dream is that a man will take her in his arms, throw her into bed... and clean the whole house while she sleeps. - Unknown

The worst thing about work in the house or home is that whatever you do it is destroyed, laid waste or eaten within twenty-four hours. - Lady Hasluck

If your house is really a mess and a stranger comes to the door, greet him with, "Who could have done this? We have no enemies." - Phyllis Diller

Science is built up with facts, as a house is with stones. But a collection of facts is no more a science than a heap of stones is a house. - Jules H Poincare

This is a honeydew day. That is when you get a day off and the wife says, "Honey, do this," and "Honey, do that" around the house. - Jim Lemon