For Sale - One Useless Cat

You gotta be kitten me. - Unknown

All art is quite useless. - Oscar Wilde

International Spade The Cat Week - Archie Bunker

Catacomb: A feline grooming tool - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

After dark, all cats are leopards. - Zuni Proverb

Don't judge a cat by its coat. - Magdalena VandenBerg

Dogs have masters. Cats have staff. - Unknown

Meow means "woof" in cat. - George Carlin

When the cat dies, the mice rejoice. - African saying

Computers are useless. They can only give you answers. - Pablo Picasso

Mouse: An animal which strews its path with fainting women. - Ambrose Bierce

Worry is today's mice nibbling on tomorrow's cheese. - Unknown

The Cat. He walked by himself, and all places were alike to him. - Rudyard Kipling

If the cat sits long enough at the hole, it will catch the mouse. - Irish proverb

There are two means of refuge from the miseries of life: music and cats. - Albert Schweitzer

Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a function. - Garrison Keillor

Freedom of the press is useless when people do not understand what they read. - Gerald F Lieberman

The main difference between a cat and a lie is that a cat only has nine lives. - Mark Twain

When black cats prowl and pumpkins gleam,
May luck be yours on Halloween. - Unknown

When we cannot find contentment in ourselves, it is useless to seek it elsewhere. - Francois de la Rochefoucauld

Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier'n puttin' it back. - Will Rogers

Sleep is like my cat. I can call him by his name, but he still won't come to me. - Shane Koyczan

There is nothing so useless as doing efficiently that which should not be done at all. - Peter F Drucker

I love cats because I enjoy my home, and little by little they become its visible soul. - Jean Cocteau

If a farmer fills his barn with grain, he gets mice; if he leaves it empty, he gets actors. - Bill Vaughan

Always the cat remains a little beyond the limits we try to set for him in our blind folly. - Andre Norton

One of the most striking differences between a cat and a lie is that a cat has only nine lives. - Mark Twain

I went to a garage sale. "How much for the garage?" "It's not for sale." - Steven Wright

Before you've practiced, the theory is useless. After you've practiced, the theory is obvious. - David Williams

Everything is for sale in Hollywood; the fairy tale, the costume, the pumpkin, the footman and the mice. - Amanda Eliasch

Aw, Dad, you've done a lot of great things, but you're a very old man, and old people are useless. - Homer Simpson

When witches go riding and black cats are seen,
The moon laughs and whispers, 'tis near Halloween. - Unknown

If you can spend a perfectly useless afternoon in a perfectly useless manner, you have learned how to live. - Lin Yutang

Integrity without knowledge is weak and useless, and knowledge without integrity is dangerous and dreadful. - Samuel Johnson

A tom cat hijacked a plane, stuck a pistol into the pilot's ribs and demanded, "Take me to the Canaries." - Bob Monkhouse

If a dog jumps in your lap, it is because he is fond of you; but if a cat does the same thing, it is because your lap is warmer. - Alfred N Whitehead

One of the simple but genuine pleasures in life is getting up in the morning and hurrying to a mouse trap you set the night before. - Kin Hubbard

I put contact lenses in my dog's eyes. They had little pictures of cats on them. Then I took one out and he ran around in circles. - Steven Wright

One of my biggest fears is that I'm going to die alone in my home, and my cats will eat me because I am too dead to open their food cans. - Kelli Jae Baeli

If animals could speak, the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow; but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much. - Mark Twain