Fat Twin Sisters

Diets are mainly food for thought. - N Wylie Jones

You can never be too rich or too thin. - Wallis W Simpson

You know why fish are so thin? They eat fish. - Jerry Seinfeld

Have great, secret, big, fat hopes for yourself. - Gloria Vanderbilt

My weight is perfect for my height - which varies. - Unknown

Eat, drink and be merry, for tomorrow you may diet. - Unknown

Restore a man to his health, his purse lies open to thee. - Robert Burton

Information is pretty thin stuff unless mixed with experience. - Clarence Day

The cardiologist's diet: - If it tastes good, spit it out. - Unknown

If you want to look young and thin, hang around old fat people. - Jim Eason

I find there is only one way to look thin: hang out with fat people. - Rodney Dangerfield

Being in a good frame of mind helps one keep in the picture of health. - Unknown

'Escargot' is French for 'fat crawling bag of phlegm'. - Dave Barry

The key to a healthy lawn is to take care of what happens below ground. - Mike Bechtle

Celebrity was a long time in coming; it will go away. Everything goes away. - Carol Burnett

In nothing do men more nearly approach the gods than in giving health to men. - Cicero

I've exercised with women so thin that buzzards followed them to their cars. - Erma Bombeck

The two kinds of people on earth are the people who lift and the people who lean. - Unknown

To live is like to love - all reason is against it, and all healthy instinct for it. - Samuel Butler

"The Hunchback Of Notre Dame" had the big fat English actor, Charles Lawson. - Archie Bunker

The man who is ostentatious of his modesty is twin to the statue that wears a fig-leaf. - Mark Twain

A celebrity is anyone who looks like he spends more than two hours working on his hair. - Steve Martin

The chief excitement in a woman's life is spotting women who are fatter than she is. - Helen Rowland

There is a thin line that separates laughter and pain, comedy and tragedy, humor and hurt. - Erma Bombeck

My act is sort of improvisational. I have a skeleton in my head, but no fat or skin on it. - Paula Poundstone

We don't come to Canada for our health. We can think of other ways of enjoying ourselves. - Prince Philip

I went on a diet, swore off drinking and heavy eating, and in fourteen days I lost two weeks. - Joe E Lewis

If you think health care is expensive now, wait until you see what it costs when it's free. - P.J. O'Rourke

Health is the greatest gift, contentment the greatest wealth, faithfulness the best relationship. - Buddha

The nice thing about being a celebrity is that if you bore people they think it's their fault. - Henry Kissinger

Cigarette sales would drop to zero overnight if the warning said, "Cigarettes contain fat." - Dave Barry

My wife is on a diet. Coconuts and bananas. She hasn't lost any weight, but she can sure climb a tree. - Henny Youngman

A healthy male adult bore consumes each year one and a half times his own weight in other people's patience. - John Updike

When wealth is lost, nothing is lost. When health is lost, something is lost. When character is lost, all is lost. - Rev. Billy Graham

America is a country where half the money is spent buying food, and the other half is spent trying to lose weight. - Unknown

Health is the state about which medicine has nothing to say; sanctity is the state about which theology has nothing to say. - W H Auden

Confidence is beautiful, no matter your size, no matter your weight. Be confident in who you are and you'll be beautiful. - Unknown

I cannot but bless the memory of Julius Caesar, for the great esteem he expressed for fat men; and his aversion to lean ones. - David Hume

If you want your kids to listen to you, don't yell at them. Whisper. Make them lean in. My kids taught me that. I do it with adults now. - Mario Batali

The best way to lose weight is to close your mouth - something very difficult for a politician. Or watch your food - just watch it, don't eat it. - Edward I Kock