First Lady Priorities

Moose are the squirrels of Alaska. - Tim Moon

A squirrel is just a rat with a cuter outfit. - Sarah J. Parker

The squirrel that you kill in jest, dies in earnest. - Henry David Thoreau

Mick Jagger could French-kiss a moose. He has child-bearing lips. - Joan Rivers

I'm as strong as a bull moose and you can use me to the limit. - Theodore Roosevelt

I am not a member of any organized political party. I am a Democrat. - Will Rogers

Texas is now a cornerstone of the electoral college for Republicans. - Ed Gillespie

Republicans will do anything for the poor except get off their backs. - American Proverb

You have to have been a Republican to know how good it is to be a Democrat. - Jackie Kennedy

Democrats haven't been this upset since Republicans freed their slaves. - Unknown

A leader in the Democratic Party is a boss, in the Republican Party he is a leader. - Harry S Truman

The one thing I do not want to be called is First Lady. It sounds like a saddle horse. - Jacqueline Kennedy

The election is not very far off when a candidate can recognize you across the street. - Kin Hubbard

Moose: An animal that has a head and horns on one end and a living room wall on the other - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Democracy substitutes election by the incompetent many for appointment by the corrupt few. - George Bernard Shaw

'Rocky' represents the optimistic side of life, and 'Rambo' represents purgatory. - Sylvester Stallone

A moose is an animal with horns on the front of its head and a hunting lodge wall on the back of it. - Groucho Marx

Folks who don't know why America is the Land of Promise should be here during an election campaign. - Milton Berle

The largest party in America is neither the Democrats nor the Republicans. It's the party of non-voters. - Robert Reich

Sometimes an alien would stand with a moose, not because of solidarity, but because of accidentally doing it. - Tao Lin

I know runners who have suffered a tick bite and ended up with Lyme disease. I'll take an angry moose any day. - Don Kardong

A squirrel dying in front of your house may be more relevant to your interests right now than people dying in Africa. - Mark Zuckerberg

The only difference between the Democrats and the Republicans is that the Democrats allow the poor to be corrupt, too. - Oscar Levant

You can't be suspicious of a tree, or accuse a bird or a squirrel of subversion or challenge the ideology of a violet. - Hal Borland

Never feel self-pity, the most destructive emotion there is. How awful to be caught up in the terrible squirrel cage of self. - Millicent Fenwick

An election is coming. Universal peace is declared, and the foxes have a sincere interest in prolonging the lives of the poultry. - George Eliot

Hunters will tell you that a moose is a wily and ferocious forest creature. Nonsense. A moose is a cow drawn by a three-year-old. - Bill Bryson

Wolves directly affect the entire ecosystem, not just moose populations, their main prey, because less moose equals more tree growth. - Rolf Peterson

Every creature is better alive than dead, men and moose and pine trees, and he who understands it aright will rather preserve its life than destroy it. - Henry David Thoreau

It is enough that the people know there was an election. The people who cast the votes decide nothing. The people who count the votes decide everything. - Joseph Stalin

We have learned so many lessons,
Since our heads were bowed in grief,
That have kept our boat from crashing
On life's ragged, rocky reef. - Gertrude T Buckingham

Of all the wonders of nature, a tree in summer is perhaps the most remarkable; with the possible exception of a moose singing 'Embraceable You' in spats. - Woody Allen

According to New York publishers, Bill Clinton will get more money for his book than Hillary Clinton got for hers. Well, duh. At least his book has some sex in it. - Jay Leno

If you want to go foraging into the wilds of Canada without proper gear, you deserve what you get, even if that happens to include being attacked by an undead moose. - Mira Grant

Donald J. Trump is calling for a total and complete shutdown of Muslims entering the United States until our country's representatives can figure out what is going on. - Donald Trump

Somebody made the statement that Donald Trump has built or owns the greatest collection of golf courses, ever, in the history of golf. And I believe that is 100 percent true. - Donald Trump

Let us not seek the Republican answer or the Democratic answer, but the right answer. Let us not seek to fix the blame for the past. Let us accept our own responsibility for the future. - John F Kennedy

Megyn Kelly: You've called women you don't like "fat pigs," "dogs," "slobs," and "disgusting animals."
Donald Trump: Only Rosie O'Donnell. - Donald Trump

If I were a liberal Democrat, people would say I'm the super genius of all time. If you're a conservative Republican, you've got to fight for your life. It's really an amazing thing. - Donald Trump

Millions of Americans are standing up and saying, 'We want our country back!' Republicans, Democrats, Independents, will not go down the path of Greece, we will not go quietly into the night. - Ted Cruz