White House Fence Bid

I love my country - it’s the government I’m afraid of!


Three contractors bid on the White House fence. One is from Chicago, another from Kentucky, and the third is from New Orleans.

All three go with a White House official to examine the fence.

The New Orleans contractor takes out a tape measure and does some measuring, then works some figures with a pencil.

“Well,” he says, “I figure the job will run about $9,000. That’s $4,000 for materials, $4,000 for my crew and $1,000 profit for me.”

The Kentucky contractor also does some measuring and figuring, then says, “I can do this job for $7,000. That’s $3,000 for materials, $3,000 for my crew and $1,000 profit for me.”

The Chicago contractor doesn’t measure or figure, but leans over to the White House official and whispers, “$27,000.”

The official, incredulous, says, “You didn’t even measure like the other guys. How did you come up with such a high figure?”

The Chicago contractor whispers back, “$10,000 for me, $10,000 for you, and we hire the guy from Kentucky to fix the fence.”

“Done!” replies the government official.

And that, my friends, is how the Government Stimulus plan worked.


Four boxes keep us free: the soap box, the ballot box,
the jury box, and the cartridge box.

QuotaBills
There is no gambling like politics. - Benjamin Disraeli

Politics is the art of the possible. - Otto von Bismarck

Crime does not pay as well as politics. - Alfred E. Newman

Man is not free unless government is limited. - Ronald Reagan

Every country has the government it deserves. - Joseph de Maistre

Government cannot and must not replace private initiative. - Kim Campbell

Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows - marriage does. - Groucho Marx

A society of sheep must in time beget a government of wolves. - Bertrand de Jouvenel

A government is the only known vessel that leaks from the top. - James Reston

An honest man in politics shines more than he would elsewhere. - Mark Twain

Politics is too serious a matter to be left to the politicians. - Charles de Gaulle

Don't ever take a fence down until you know why it was put up. - Robert Frost

Every woman dreams of her own political career and her own place in life. - Raisa M. Gorbachev

University politics are vicious precisely because the stakes are so small. - Henry Kissinger

Government can't give us anything without depriving us of something else. - Henry Hazlitt

The flood of money that gushes into politics today is a pollution of democracy. - Theodore White

The secret of political bargaining is to look more strong than what you really are. - Subhash Bose

Do you know what White House correspondents call actors who pose as reporters? Anchors. - Jay Leno

Patriotism is supporting your country all the time and your government when it deserves it. - Mark Twain

In Pierre Elliott Trudeau, Canada has at last produced a political leader worthy of assassination. - Irving Layton

Why pay money to have your family tree traced; go into politics and your opponents will do it for you. - Unknown

Animals are like little children a bit. They're simple. They don't have politics driving them. - Annabelle Sabloff

Ex-Presidents of the United States get state subsidies. Not so in Russia. You get no government support. - Mikhail Gorbachev

I don't look for much to come out of government ownership as long as we have Democrats and Republicans. - Kin Hubbard

Government is the great fiction, through which everybody endeavors to live at the expense of everybody else. - Frederic Bastiat

The truth is that whenever a fence is removed, it's wise to ask why it was put there in the first place. - Ravi Zacharias

Idealism is like a castle in the air if it is not based on a solid foundation of social and political realism. - Claude McKay

The hardest thing about any political campaign is how to win without proving that you are unworthy of winning. - Theodor Adorno

Just because you do not take an interest in politics doesn't mean politics won't take an interest in you. - Pericles (430 B.C.)

One of the penalties for refusing to participate in politics is that you end up being governed by your inferiors. - Plato

The only security men can have for their political liberty, consists in keeping their money in their own pockets. - Lysander Spooner

Our whole constitutional heritage rebels at the thought of giving government the power to control men's minds. - Thurgood Marshall

Politics is the only business where doing nothing other than making the other guy look bad is an acceptable outcome. - Mark Warner

Frankly, I'd like to see the government get out of war altogether and leave the whole field to private industry. - Joseph Heller

Very few of these panic-mongers have any personal knowledge of the countries that are already under blackshirt government. - Lord Rothermere

Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly, and applying the wrong remedy. - Groucho Marx

When it comes to politics, I sit down on a sofa and grab some popcorn - or sometimes I crouch down in order not to get shot. - Sergey Galitsky

I am quite sure now that often in matters concerning religion and politics, a man's reasoning powers are not above the monkeys. - Mark Twain

Our future cannot depend on the government alone. The ultimate solutions lie in the attitudes and the actions of the American people. - Joe Biden

Politicians also have no leisure, because they are always aiming at something beyond political life itself, power and glory, or happiness. - Aristotle


see also   Government,  Politics  &  Work  Sections
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28-Nov-2020