Redneck Tree Chair

Reclimbing chair - Archie Bunker

My family tree could use some pruning. - Unknown

The righteous will flourish like the palm tree. - Psalms 92:12

Once there was a tree, and she loved a little boy. - Shel Silverstein

A sure cure for seasickness is to sit under a tree. - Spike Milligan

If you hate where you are, move - you are not a tree. - Unknown

America is so advanced that even the chairs are electric. - Doug Hamwell

Preoccupied with a single leaf you won't see the tree. - Vagabond

The patriot's blood is the seed of Freedom's tree. - Thomas Campbell

I think that I shall never see
A poem lovely as a tree. - Joyce Kilmer

Everyone makes fun of the Redneck until the Zombie Apocalypse. - Unknown

The seat of knowledge is in the head, of wisdom, in the heart. - William Hazlitt

Character is the root of the tree; conduct, the fruit it bears. - E.M. Bounds

Tragedy: a busload of lawyers going over a cliff with an empty seat. - Unknown

You should not paint the chair, but only what someone has felt about it. - Edvard Munch

The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is now. - Chinese Proverb

Committee work is like a soft chair - easy to get into but hard to get out of. - Kenneth J Shively

You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't. - Jeff Foxworthy

Learn not to talk to me. You shake the tree, a leopard's going to fall out. - Kobe Bryant

I don't have to look up my family tree, because I know that I'm the sap. - Fred Allen

Each has his own tree of ancestors, but at the top of all sits Probably Arboreal. - Robert Louis Stevenson

The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants. - Thomas Jefferson

I still have my Christmas Tree. I looked at it today. Sure enough, I couldn't see any forests. - Steven Wright

Chair pose is a defiance of spirit, showing how high you can reach even when you're forced down. - Unknown

Why pay money to have your family tree traced; go into politics and your opponents will do it for you. - Unknown

I am an expert of electricity. My father occupied the chair of applied electricity at the state prison. - WC Fields

I wanted to do something nice so I bought my mother-in-law a chair. Now they won't let me plug it in. - Henny Youngman

My wife is on a diet. Coconuts and bananas. She hasn't lost any weight, but she can sure climb a tree. - Henny Youngman

You might be a redneck if your wheelbarrow breaks and it takes four relatives to figure out how to fix it. - Jeff Foxworthy

You can't deny laughter. When it comes, it plops down in your favorite chair and stays as long as it wants. - Stephen King

I'll see you at the opera tonight. I'll hold your seat till you get there. After that, you're on your own. - Groucho Marx

It's in the democratic citizen's nature to be like a leaf that doesn't believe in the tree it's part of. - David Foster Wallace

My husband wanted one of those big-screen TVs for his birthday. So I just moved his chair closer to the one we have already. - Wendy Liebman

As the poet said, "Only God can make a tree" - probably because it's so hard to figure out how to get the bark on. - Woody Allen

On the top of the Crumpetty Tree
The Quangle Wangle sat,
But his face you could not see,
On account of his Beaver Hat. - Edward Lear

You can imagine me as a kid growing up in redneck Texas with ballet shoes, tucking the violin under my arm. I had to fight my way up. - Patrick Swayze

Wolves directly affect the entire ecosystem, not just moose populations, their main prey, because less moose equals more tree growth. - Rolf Peterson

Only when the last tree has withered, and the last fish caught, and the last river been poisoned, will we realize we cannot eat money. - Cree Proverb

Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid. - Albert Einstein

Some national parks have long waiting lists for camping reservations. When you have to wait a year to sleep next to a tree, something is wrong. - George Carlin