Father Load

Father of the Year

A little prevention goes a long way


A man boarded a plane with 6 kids.

After they got settled in their seats a woman sitting across the aisle from him leaned over to him and asked, “Are all of those kids yours?”

He replied, “No. I work for a condom company. These are customer complaints.”


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The Child is father of the Man. - William Wordsworth

Every child begins the world again. - Henry David Thoreau

Lap Top: Where little kids feel comfy - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Children are the wisdom of the nation. - African Saying

A father is a banker provided by nature. - French Proverb

Germs: The only things kids will share freely - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

My music is best understood by children and animals. - Igor Stravinsky

Kids don't remember their best day of television. - Unknown

With kids, the days are long, but the years are short. - John Leguizamo

The childhood shows the man, as morning shows the day. - John Milton

No one was ever great without some portion of divine inspiration. - Cicero

Children see things very well sometimes - and idealists even better. - Lorraine Hansbury

Cleaning up with children around is like shoveling during a blizzard. - Margaret C Banning

If you want your children to listen, try talking softly to someone else. - Ann Landers

I am married to Beatrice Salkeld, a painter. We have no children, except me. - Brendan Behan

As a child, my family's menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it. - Buddy Hackett

I'm not buying my kids an encyclopedia. Let them walk to school like I did. - Yogi Berra

Inspiration responds to our attentiveness in various and sometimes unexpected ways. - Wayne W Dyer

Kidnap: 1. Something that a young child takes when tired; 2. When a baby goat sleeps. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Children need the freedom and time to play. Play is not a luxury. Play is a necessity. - Kay R. Jamison

The most effective kind of education is that a child should play amongst lovely things. - Plato

I believe that our Heavenly Father invented man because he was disappointed in the monkey. - Mark Twain

Because: Mom's reason for having kids do things which can't be explained logically - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

What is so real as the cry of a child? A rabbit's cry may be wilder but it has no soul. - Sylvia Plath

I think those neighborhood signs that say 'slow children playing' are so very mean. - Zach Galifianakis

Even when freshly washed and relieved of all obvious confections, children tend to be sticky. - Fran Lebowitz

I married your mother because I wanted children.
Imagine my disappointment when you came along. - Groucho Marx

A man who gives his children habits of industry provides for them better than by giving them a fortune. - Richard Whately

When my kids become wild and unruly, I use a nice, safe playpen. When they're finished, I climb out. - Erma Bombeck

We ought to be doing all we can to make it possible for every child to fulfill his or her God-given potential. - Hillary Rodham Clinton

Children raced outside. She surveyed their trail - traces of sticky fingerprints across everything, like wee poems. - Dr. SunWolf

Children are smarter than any of us. Know how I know that? I don't know one child with a full time job and children. - Bill Hicks

The quality of a father can be seen in the goals, dreams, and aspirations he sets not only for himself, but for his family. - Reed Markham

If I had one wish for my children, it would be that each of them would reach for goals that have meaning for them as individuals. - Lillian Carter

Don't give up trying to do what you really want to do. Where there is love and inspiration, I don't think you can go wrong. - Ella Fitzgerald

The more difficulties one has to encounter, within and without, the more significant and the higher in inspiration his life will be. - Horace Bushnell

My father said there were two kinds of people in the world: givers and takers. The takers may eat better, but the givers sleep better. - Marlo Thomas

Education commences on the mother's knee, and every word spoken within hearsay of little children tends toward the formation of character. - Hosea Ballou

Hypothesis: 1. First thing a Redneck teenager says to his father on the phone; 2. Hippo, horse; thesis, placing: putting something on a horse. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Just be good and kind to your children. Not only are they the future of the world, they're the ones who can sign you into the nursing home. - Dennis Miller


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25-Jun-2022