Redneck Math

Pi are squared, aren’t they?

Teacher:   “What is the area of a circle, Bubba - Pi R^2?”
Bubba:   “Pie are not square. Pie are round. Cornbread are square.”

Teacher:   “What is a proof?”
Bubba:   “One-half percent of alcohol.”

Everything is physics and math. - Katherine Johnson

Math research is more like a marathon. - Terence Tao

I go to school the youth to learn the future. - Robert Frost

Academy: A modern school where football is taught - Daffynitions

I go to school, but I never learn what I want to know. - Bill Watterson

I am an expert in Higher Level Math: You + God = Enough - Zig Ziglar

A child educated only at school is an uneducated child. - George Santayana

A college education shows a man how little other people know. - T.C. Hailburton

Math is like love - a simple idea but it can get complicated. - R. Drabek

School Of Hard Knocks: Where they train door-to-door salesmen - Daffynitions

Example is the school of mankind, and they will learn at no other. - Edmund Burke

God made the Idiot for practice, and then He made the School Board. - Mark Twain

I don't want to send them to jail. I want to send them to school. - Adlai Stevenson

When I was in high school, I earned the pimple award and every other gross-out award. - Jack Nicholson

In the first place God made idiots. This was for practice. Then He made school boards. - Mark Twain

I can get motivated seeing a kid at my son's school overcome a learning disability. - Jason Alexander

Mathematics is the cheapest science. All one needs for mathematics is a pencil and a paper. - George Polya

Mathematics is a game played according to certain simple rules with meaningless marks on paper. - David Hilbert

There are 3 kinds of people in this world: those who are good at math, and those who aren't. - Unknown

It's not uncommon to see kids on the school bus reading books and doing homework on the bus. - Anthony Amero

Life on a farm is a school of patience. You can't hurry the crops or make an ox in two days. - Haneri Liogier

If a young person has any idealism at all, it's strongest about the time he finishes college. - Sargent Shriver

I must study politics and war that my sons may have the liberty to study mathematics and philosophy. - John Adams

I learned law so well, the day I graduated I used the college, won the case, and got my tuition back. - Fred Allen

Mathematics is distinguished from all other sciences except only ethics, in standing in no need of ethics. - Charles Peirce

Finish last in your league and they call you idiot. Finish last in medical school and they call you doctor. - Abe Lemons

Smartness runs in my family. When I went to school I was so smart my teacher was in my class for five years. - George Burns

What if the kid you bullied at school, grew up, and turned out to be the only surgeon who could save your life? - Lynette Mather

The most important thing we learn at school is the fact that the most important things can't be learned at school. - Haruki Murakami

Mathematics is like checkers in being suitable for the young, not too difficult, amusing, and without peril to the state. - Plato

I went to a Catholic boys' school for a year, but that was to play hockey. Religion class was quite contentious for me. - Keanu Reeves

It is the studying you do after your school days that really counts. Otherwise, you know only that which everyone else knows. - Henry L. Doherty

I think sleeping was my problem in school. If school had started at four in the afternoon, I'd be a college graduate today. - George Foreman

You don't have to be a genius or a visionary or even a college graduate to be successful. You just need a framework and a dream. - Michael Dell

Mathematics takes us into the region of absolute necessity, to which not only the actual word, but every possible word, must conform. - Bertrand Russell

In the real world, the smartest people are people who make mistakes and learn. In school, the smartest people don't make mistakes. - Robert T Kiyosaki

As far as the laws of mathematics refer to reality, they are not certain; and as far as they are certain, they do not refer to reality. - Albert Einstein

I was named the Class Clown in the high school yearbook, so I was always turning to comedy and laughter to heal and to get me through things. - Guillermo Diaz

Hypothesis: 1. First thing a Redneck teenager says to his father on the phone; 2. Hippo, horse; thesis, placing: putting something on a horse. - Daffynitions

Mushroom: 1. A motel for quickies; 2. The place where they store the school food; 3. A room that has no sides, no walls, no doors and no ceilings. - Daffynitions

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