Government Measurement

Flagpole math for labourers


Ray and Bob, two Government maintenance guys, were standing at the base of a flagpole, looking up.

A woman walked by and asked what they were doing.

“We’re supposed to find the height of the flagpole”, said Bob, “but we don’t have a ladder.”

The woman said, “Hand me that wrench out of your toolbox.”
She loosened a few bolts, then laid the pole down. She then took a tape measure from their toolbox, took a measurement and announced, “Eighteen feet, six inches” and walked away.

Ray shook his head and laughed. “Well, ain’t that just like a ‘Miss-know-it-all’ woman?” he said. “We need the height and she gives us the length!”

Ray and Bob are still working for the Government.


QuotaBills
Confidence is a very fragile thing. - Joe Montana

Wiping out is an underappreciated skill. - Laird Hamilton

Adversity tests a man's true character. - Unknown

Habits form character, and character forms destiny. - James Allen

A person who is quietly confident makes the best leader. - Fred Wilson

Once you get rid of integrity the rest is a piece of cake. - Larry Hagman

The only way I can get a leading-man role is if I write it. - John Cleese

There is no greater index of character so sure as the voice. - Benjamin Disraeli

World War II was the last government program that really worked. - George Will

The important things are children, honesty, integrity and faith. - Andy Williams

Dogs are getting bigger, according to a leading dog manufacturer. - Leo Rosten

Philosophy: A route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing. - Ambrose Bierce

Character may almost be called the most effective means of persuasion. - Aristotle

The beginning of leadership is a battle for the hearts and minds of men. - Bernard L Montgomery

The best time management strategy: don't find the time, find the why. - Chris Guillebeau

It's hard to lead a cavalry charge if you think you look funny on a horse. - Adlai Stevenson

Leadership is intangible, and therefore no weapon ever designed can replace it. - Omar N. Bradley

People seem not to see that their opinion of the world is also a confession of character. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

It requires less character to discover the faults of others than is does to tolerate them. - J. Petit Senn

Integrity is choosing your thoughts and actions based on values rather than personal gain. - Unknown

A man is literally what he thinks, his character being the complete sum of all his thoughts. - James Allen

Any disaster you can survive is an improvement in your character, your stature, and your life. - Joseph Campbell

The less I know about a subject, the more confidence I have; and the more light I throw on it. - Mark Twain

Who aims at excellence will be above mediocrity; who aims at mediocrity will be far short of it. - Burmese Saying

Leadership is the art of getting others to want to do something you are convinced should be done. - Vance Packard

Character is that which reveals moral purposes, exposing the class of things man chooses or avoids. - Aristotle

The role of leadership is to transform the complex situation into small pieces and prioritize them. - Carlos Ghosn

He that wrestles with us strengthens our nerves, and sharpens our skill. Our antagonist is our helper. - Edmund Burke

The acceptance of certain realities doesn't preclude idealism. It can lead to certain breakthroughs. - Rem Koolhaas

Integrity without knowledge is weak and useless, and knowledge without integrity is dangerous and dreadful. - Samuel Johnson

I don't look for much to come out of government ownership as long as we have Democrats and Republicans. - Kin Hubbard

When government accepts responsibility for people, then people no longer take responsibility for themselves. - George Pataki

Don't be accusing me of taking a bribe. You know what they call that, "definition of character." - Archie Bunker

Without a sense of proportion there can be neither good taste nor genuine intelligence, no perhaps moral integrity. - Eric Hoffer

Competition can damage self-esteem, create anxiety, and lead to cheating and hurt feelings. But so can romantic love. - Mariah Burton Nelson

Moral authority comes from following universal and timeless principles like honesty, integrity, treating people with respect. - Stephen Covey

Leadership is all about caring, daring and sharing. Caring for people, Daring to Act fearlessly, and Sharing the success with all. - Sujit Lalwani

The workers' and peasants' government proposes to all warring peoples... negotiations leading to a just, democratic peace. - Lenin

I hope you have not been leading a double life, pretending to be wicked and being really good all the time. That would be hypocrisy. - Oscar Wilde

If you make any money, the government shoves you in the creek once a year with it in your pockets, and all that don't get wet you can keep. - Will Rogers


see also   Dubm,  Feminist,  Government  &  Work  Sections
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24-Oct-2021