Redneck Restaurant

I don't believe in dining on an empty stomach. - WC Fields

Everyone makes fun of the Redneck until the Zombie Apocalypse. - Unknown

Her face looked like something on the menu in a seafood restaurant. - Woody Allen

You cannot come to a Nigerian restaurant without having pepper soup. - Ben Okri

I'll have a "Cafe Mocha Vodka Valium Latte" to go, please. - Unknown

You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't. - Jeff Foxworthy

The other night I ate at a real nice family restaurant. Every table had an argument going. - George Carlin

Of course I have played outdoor games. I once played dominoes in an open air cafe in Paris. - Oscar Wilde

Love, like a chicken salad or restaurant hash, must be taken with blind faith or it loses its flavor. - Helen Rowland

You might be a redneck if your wheelbarrow breaks and it takes four relatives to figure out how to fix it. - Jeff Foxworthy

I had a meal last night. I ordered everything in French - surprised everybody, it was a Chinese restaurant. - Tommy Cooper

I went to a fancy French restaurant called "Deja Vu." The headwaiter said, "Don't I know you?" - Steven Wright

I went to a restaurant that serves "breakfast at any time". So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance. - Steven Wright

The disparity between a restaurant's price and food quality rises in direct proportion to the size of the pepper mill. - Bryan Miller

You can imagine me as a kid growing up in redneck Texas with ballet shoes, tucking the violin under my arm. I had to fight my way up. - Patrick Swayze

Eating a tuna roll at a sushi restaurant should be considered no more environmentally benign than driving a Hummer or harpooning a manatee. - Daniel Pauly

Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, have a little beverage, good food and companionship.
She goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays. - Red Skelton