Rools Four Righters

If yore a groan reader, this is 4U & Jethro


 1.. Verbs HAS to agree with their subjects.
 2.. Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.
 3.. And don’t start a sentence with a conjunction.
 4.. It is wrong to ever split an infinitive.
 5.. Avoid clichés like the plague. (They’re old hat)
 6.. Also, always avoid annoying alliteration.
 7.. Be more or less specific.
 8.. Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are (usually) unnecessary.
 9.. Also too, never, ever use repetitive redundancies.
10.. No sentence fragments.
11.. Contractions aren’t necessary and shouldn’t be used.
12.. Foreign words and phrases are not apropos.
13.. Do not be redundant; do not use more words than necessary; it’s highly superfluous.
14.. One should NEVER generalize.
15.. Comparisons are as bad as clichés.
16.. Don’t use no double negatives.
17.. Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, etc.
18.. One-word sentences? Eliminate.
19.. Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake.
20.. The passive voice is to be ignored.
21.. Eliminate commas, that are, not necessary. Parenthetical words however should be enclosed in commas.
22.. Never use a big word when a diminutive one would suffice.
23.. Kill all exclamation points!!!
24.. Use words correctly, irregardless of how others use them.
25.. Understatement is always the absolute best way to put forth earth-shaking ideas.
26.. Use the apostrophe in it’s proper place and omit it when its not needed.
27.. Eliminate quotations. As Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “I hate quotations. Tell me what you know.”
28.. If you’ve heard it once, you’ve heard it a thousand times: Resist hyperbole. Not one writer in a million can use it correctly.
29.. Puns are for children, not groan readers.
30.. Go around the barn at high noon to avoid colloquialisms.
31.. Even if a mixed metaphor sings, it should be derailed.
32.. Who needs rhetorical questions?
33.. Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement. And finally...
34.. Proofread carefully to see if you any words out.


QuotaBills
A riot is the language of the unheard. - Martin Luther King, Jr.

A lawn is nature under totalitarian rule. - Michael Pollan

Dance is the hidden language of the soul. - Martha Graham

I am disappointment in you're grammar. - Unknown

When passion rules, she never rules wisely. - Ben Franklin

Speech is the vestibule to the palace of love. - Jami of Persia

If you obey all the rules, you miss all the fun. - Katharine Hepburn

A story is told as much by silence as by speech. - Susan Griffin

I have often regretted my speech, never my silence. - Xenocrates

Appropriate rules cultivate a disciplined character. - Bill Welker

Any fool can make a rule, and any fool will mind it. - Henry David Thoreau

Ill can he rule the great that cannot reach the small. - Edmund Spenser

The adjective is the banana peel of the parts of speech. - Clifton Fadiman

Works of art make rules; rules do not make works of art. - Claude Debussy

You must welcome change as the rule but not as your ruler. - Denis Waitley

Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain. - Lily Tomlin

Leadership is the capacity to translate vision into reality. - Warren G Bennis

We are all here for a spell; get all the good laughs you can. - Will Rogers

We need a president who's fluent in at least one language. - Buck Henry

Are we playing Men's Rules today or do we count every putt? - Unknown

Computers are like Old Testament gods; lots of rules and no mercy. - Joseph Cambell

Grammar is a piano I play by ear. All I know about grammar is its power. - Joan Didion

Toss out the rules; don't think outside the box, throw the box away. - Nido Qubein

I believe in rules. If there weren't any rules, how could you break them? - Leo Durocher

The rule of my life is to make business a pleasure, and pleasure my business. - Aaron Burr

To learn who rules over you, simply find out who you are not allowed to criticize. - Voltaire

If you cannot understand me in my speech, how can you understand me in my silence? - Ravi Zacharias

Canada is founded upon principles that recognize the supremacy of God and the rule of law. - Stockwell Day

At no time is freedom of speech more precious than when a man hits his thumb with a hammer. - Marshall Lumsden

A person's name is, to that person, the sweetest, most important sound in any language. - Dale Carnegie

Grammar, which knows how to lord it over kings, and with high hands makes them obey its laws. - Moliere

The trouble with her is that she lacks the power of conversation but not the power of speech. - George Bernard Shaw

There are three basic rules for great comedy. Unfortunately no-one can remember what they are. - Arthur Smith

You're an old-timer if you can remember when setting the world on fire was a figure of speech. - Franklin P Jones

Already, companies that speak in the language of the pitch, the dog-and-pony show, are no longer speaking to anyone. - Unknown

Grammar: 1. Lives with granpar; 2. The difference between Feeling Your Nuts and Feeling You’re Nuts. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Two may talk together under the same roof for many years, yet never really meet; and two others at first speech are old friends. - Mary Catherwood

If I had my life to live over again, I would have made a rule to read some poetry and listen to some music at least once every week. - Charles Darwin

Music is a language that doesn't speak in particular words. It speaks in emotions, and if it's in the bones, it's in the bones. - Keith Richards

I remain convinced that obstinate addiction to ordinary language in our private thoughts is one of the main obstacles to progress in philosophy. - Bertrand Russell


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27-Jul-2021