Rools Four Righters

If yore a groan reader, this is 4U & Jethro


 1.. Verbs HAS to agree with their subjects.
 2.. Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.
 3.. And don’t start a sentence with a conjunction.
 4.. It is wrong to ever split an infinitive.
 5.. Avoid clichés like the plague. (They’re old hat)
 6.. Also, always avoid annoying alliteration.
 7.. Be more or less specific.
 8.. Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are (usually) unnecessary.
 9.. Also too, never, ever use repetitive redundancies.
10.. No sentence fragments.
11.. Contractions aren’t necessary and shouldn’t be used.
12.. Foreign words and phrases are not apropos.
13.. Do not be redundant; do not use more words than necessary; it’s highly superfluous.
14.. One should NEVER generalize.
15.. Comparisons are as bad as clichés.
16.. Don’t use no double negatives.
17.. Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, etc.
18.. One-word sentences? Eliminate.
19.. Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake.
20.. The passive voice is to be ignored.
21.. Eliminate commas, that are, not necessary. Parenthetical words however should be enclosed in commas.
22.. Never use a big word when a diminutive one would suffice.
23.. Kill all exclamation points!!!
24.. Use words correctly, irregardless of how others use them.
25.. Understatement is always the absolute best way to put forth earth-shaking ideas.
26.. Use the apostrophe in it’s proper place and omit it when its not needed.
27.. Eliminate quotations. As Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “I hate quotations. Tell me what you know.”
28.. If you’ve heard it once, you’ve heard it a thousand times: Resist hyperbole. Not one writer in a million can use it correctly.
29.. Puns are for children, not groan readers.
30.. Go around the barn at high noon to avoid colloquialisms.
31.. Even if a mixed metaphor sings, it should be derailed.
32.. Who needs rhetorical questions?
33.. Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement. And finally...
34.. Proofread carefully to see if you any words out.


QuotaBills
Monogamy: A synonym for monotony. - Gregory Nunn

This virus just breaks all the rules. - Thomas Scott

Language is a virus from outer space. - William S Burroughs

I believe in God, only I spell it Nature. - Frank Lloyd Wright

Dance is the hidden language of the soul. - Martha Graham

Speech is of time; silence is of eternity. - Thomas Carlyle

Rule No. 1 of life. Do what makes YOU happy. - Unknown

Speech is the vestibule to the palace of love. - Jami of Persia

Well-timed silence hath more eloquence than speech. - Martin Fraquhar Tupper

It's a poor rule that won't work both ways. - Frederick Douglass

Appropriate rules cultivate a disciplined character. - Bill Welker

Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain. - Lily Tomlin

We are all here for a spell; get all the good laughs you can. - Will Rogers

An animal's eyes have the power to speak a great language. - Martin Buber

Reality can be lost when reason and language have been violated. - Ravi Zacharias

I have made it a rule never to smoke more than one cigar at a time. - Mark Twain

It is absurd that a man should rule others, who cannot rule himself. - Latin Proverb

England and America are two countries separated by a common language. - George Bernard Shaw

Silence is the language of God; it is also the language of the heart. - Sivananda

Dreams say what they mean, but they don't say it in daytime language. - Gail Godwin

It usually takes more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech. - Mark Twain

Symptoms are the body's mother tongue; signs are in a foreign language. - John Brown

The urge to save humanity is almost always a false-face for the urge to rule it. - H L Mencken

The English should give Ireland home rule - and reserve the motion picture rights. - Will Rogers

If you cannot understand me in my speech, how can you understand me in my silence? - Ravi Zacharias

There are three rules for writing a novel. Unfortunately, no one knows what they are. - W Somerset Maugham

I live by my own rules (reviewed, revised, and approved by my wife), but still my own. - Si Robertson

A conservative is a man who wants the rules changed so no one can make a pile the way he did. - Gregory Nunn

Mathematics is a game played according to certain simple rules with meaningless marks on paper. - David Hilbert

If we do not believe in freedom of speech for those we despise, we do not believe in it at all. - Noam Chomsky

Even a wise man knows doubt from time to time, it is the fool who allows it to rule his judgement. - Jennifer Hudock

Music is the language of the spirit. It opens the secret of life bringing peace, abolishing strife. - Kahlil Gibran

If you must play, decide on three things at the start: the rules of the game, the stakes, and the quitting time. - Chinese Proverb

A dinosaur out of context is like a character without a story. Worse than that, the character suffers from amnesia. - Jack Horner

A simple rule of business is, if you do the things that are easier first, then you can actually make a lot of progress. - Mark Zuckerberg

The ability to speak several languages is an asset, but the ability to keep your mouth shut in any language is priceless. - Unknown

He respects Owl, because you can't help respecting anybody who can spell TUESDAY, even if he doesn't spell it right. - A. A. Milne

He who learns the rules of wisdom without conforming to them in his life is like a man who plows in his field but does not sow. - Saadi

An organization's ability to learn, and translate that learning into action rapidly, is the ultimate competitive advantage. - Jack Welch

Always try to use the language so as to make quite clear what you mean and make sure your sentence couldn't mean anything else. - C S Lewis


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30-Jun-2022