Cleared to Land

Blessings to Saudi Air from Dallas ATC


Dallas ATC: “Tower to Saudi Air 911. You are cleared to land Eastbound on runway 9R.”

Saudi Air: “Thank you, Dallas ATC. Acknowledge cleared to land on Infidel’s runway 9R. Allah Be Praised!”

Dallas ATC: “Tower to Iran Air 711. You are cleared to land Westbound on runway 9R.”

Iran Air: “Thank you, Dallas ATC. Acknowledge cleared to land on Infidel’s runway 9R. Allah Is Great!”

Pause:   Static ...............

Saudi Air: “DALLAS ATC! DALLAS ATC!”

Dallas ATC: “Go ahead, Saudi Air 911.”

Saudi Air: “YOU HAVE CLEARED BOTH OUR AIRCRAFT FOR THE SAME RUNWAY GOING IN OPPOSITE DIRECTIONS! WE ARE ON A COLLISION COURSE! INSTRUCTIONS PLEASE!”

Dallas ATC: “Well bless your hearts. Y’all be careful now and tell Allah “hey” for us, ya hear?”


QuotaBills
Music is the poetry of the air. - Jean Paul Richter

Private jets cost a lot of money. - Donald Trump

Roasted pigeons will not fly into one's mouth. - Dutch Proverb

Mothers are angels that lift us when we cannot fly. - Unknown

What air is to the body, to feel understood is to the heart. - Stephen Covey

If you want to fly, you have to give up what weighs you down. - Roy T Bennett

The higher we soar the smaller we appear to those who cannot fly. - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

I think being a dragon would be pretty awesome... you get to fly. - Josh Keaton

Live in the sunshine
Swim in the sea
Drink the wild air - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Disappointments are to the soul what thunderstorms are to the air. - Johann C. F. von Schiller

We all thought we'd have flying cars by now, but we don't. - Dana Brunetti

Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines. - Steven Wright

For those determined to fly, having no wings is just a little detail. - Unknown

Our Air Corps reunion was held to rememmorate the great things we done. - Archie Bunker

The English have an extraordinary ability for flying into a great calm. - Alexander Woollcott

Flying is the second greatest thrill known to man. Landing is the first. - Unknown

Something in the air this morning made me feel like flying... Spring Flight - Eileen Granfors

I love Halloween: the cold air, the spooky dangers lurking around the corner. - Evan Peters

The knack of flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss. - Douglas Adams

If God had intended us to fly he would have made it easier to get to the airport. - Jonathan Winters

The moment you doubt whether you can fly, you cease for ever to be able to do it. - J.M. Barrie

A man who has both feet planted firmly in the air can be safely called a liberal. - American Proverb

Time passes too fast. Like a hummingbird flying by, it's just a blur to my eyes. - Amanda Leigh

Birds find shelter during the rain, but eagles avoid rain by flying above the clouds. - Abdul Kalam

She would stay there, flying across the sea like a mermaid with wings, until the end. - Natalia Marx

Flight Risk: Employees who are suspected of planning to leave a company or department soon - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Learn to close your eyes and trust. Learn to open your heart and love. Learn to take the risk and fly. - Maxime Lagace

I am the astronaut of boxing. Joe Louis and Jack Dempsey were just jet pilots. I'm in a world of my own. - Muhammad Ali

Give me my golf clubs, fresh air, and a beautiful partner, and you can keep my golf clubs and the fresh air. - Jack Benny

The blazing wings of dawn spirited me away, Dragon-swift above the suns-rise, flying to my destiny beyond the clouds. - Marc Secchia

The greater the difficulty, the more glory in surmounting it. Skillful pilots gain their reputation from storms and tempests. - Epictetus

If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put foundations under them. - Henry David Thoreau

Aim at the sun, and you may not reach it; but your arrow will fly far higher than if aimed at an object on a level with yourself. - Joel Hawes

Living as we do in an age of noise and bluster, success is now measured accordingly. We must all be seen, and heard, and on the air. - Daphne du Maurier

If Beethoven had been killed in a plane crash at the age of twenty-two, it would have changed the history of music... and of aviation. - Tom Stoppard

Southwest Airlines is successful because the company understands it's a customer service company. It also happens to be an airline. - Harvey Mackay

I put my air conditioner in backwards. It got cold outside. The weatherman on TV was confused. "It was supposed to be hot today." - Steven Wright

Pilots take no special joy in walking: pilots like flying. Pilots generally take pride in a good landing, not in getting out of the vehicle. - Neil Armstrong

The air up there in the clouds is very pure and fine, bracing and delicious. And why shouldn't it be? It is the same the angels breathe. - Mark Twain

Be like the bird that, passing on her flight awhile on boughs too slight, feels them give way beneath her, and yet sings, knowing that she hath wings. - Victor Hugo


see also   Air Traffic  Section
A Special Kind of Stupid
Smart Flight Attendant
Why We Live in Texas

 

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04-Aug-2021