Why do golf courses have 18 holes - not 20, or 10, or an even dozen? During a discussion among the club’s membership board at St. Andrews in 1858, a senior member pointed out that it takes exactly 18 shots to polish off a fifth of Scotch. By limiting himself to only one shot of Scotch per hole, the Scot figured a round of golf was finished when the Scotch ran out! Absentee: A missing golfing peg - Daffynitions joe-ks.com I'm a golfer, not an athlete. - Lee Westwood Golf is a puzzle without an answer. - Gary Player Work: The thing that interferes with golf. - Frank Dane Golf, like measles, should be caught young. - P G Wodehouse Where there's a Will there's a Fairway. - Unknown Golf is an easy game, it's just hard to play. - Unknown Golf is not so much a sport as an insult to lawns. - Unknown Retire to what? I already play golf and fish for a living. - Julius Boros Hold me, grip me, cherish me, pretend that I'm a golf club! - Unknown Are we playing Men's Rules today or do we count every putt? - Unknown Golf is a game where the ball lies poorly, and the players well. - Unknown Golf is a game in which you yell fore, shoot six, and write down five. - Paul Harvey If you break 100, watch your golf. If you break 80, watch your business. - Joey Adams Show me a good loser and I'll show you a man playing golf with his boss. - Unknown Retirement means no pressure, no stress, no heartache... unless you play golf. - Gene Perret Good Sportsmanship: Not picking up lost golf balls while they are still rolling - Daffynitions joe-ks.com If you think it's hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball. - Jack Lemmon Golf is the worst drug in the world. You just keep coming back fro more embarrassment. - Deacon Jones Sometimes the game of golf is just too difficult to endure with a golf club in your hands. - Bobby Jones It is almost impossible to remember how tragic a place the world is when one is playing golf. - Robert Lynd The only reason I ever played golf in the first place was so I could afford to hunt and fish. - Sam Snead I have a tip that can take five strokes off anyone's golf game. It's called an eraser. - Arnold Palmer They say that life is a lot like golf - don't believe them. Golf is a lot more complicated. - Gardner Dickinson Golf combines two favorite American pastimes: taking long walks, and hitting things with a stick. - P.J. O'Rourke As you walk down the fairway of life you must smell the roses, for you only get to play one round. - Ben Hogan I played golf. I didn't get a hole in one, but I did hit a guy. That's way more satisfying. - Mitch Hedberg Of all the useless things a person can do, limerick writing is right up there with golf and fishing. - Garrison Keillor Give me golf clubs, fresh air and a beautiful partner, and you can keep the clubs and the fresh air. - Jack Benny I carry a golf ball to put under my feet when they get tight, and a Ther-Band for general stretching. - Jessica Ennis-Hill If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play it, it's recreation. If you work at it, it's golf. - Bob Hope The place of the father in the modern suburban family is a very small one, particularly if he plays golf. - Bertrand Russell My parents live in a retirement community, which is basically a minimum-security prison with a golf course. - Joel Warshaw I'm 42 around the chest, 52 around the waist, 92 around the golf course, and a nuisance around the house. - Groucho Marx Long ago, when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft. Today, it's called golf. - Unknown Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps. - Tiger Woods I still play hockey every now and then, and I still golf. But my biggest exercise is walking my big dog in the park every day. - Michael J. Fox Learning to play golf is like learning to play the violin. It's not only difficult to do, it's very painful to everyone around you. - Hal Linden If Obama resigns from office NOW, thereby doing a great service to the country, I will give him free lifetime golf at any one of my courses. - Donald Trump I don't know him very well... I've played him at golf and beat him badly both times, and I think that probably had a negative impact on him. - Donald Trump see also Golf Section 1940 English Golf Rules Ambulance Caddy Aussie Golf Balls Removed Beginner’s Golf Brady Balls Camo Golf Balls Corporate Balls Extreme Golf in Mongolia Florida Golf Hazard Golf Ball Resort Golf Birdie in Hawaii Golf Break Golf Gimme Golf in South America Golf Language Golf Like I Do Golf Potty Putter Golf Restroom Golf Rule Changes for Senior Golfers Golf Wisdom Golfers and Scotch Golfer’s Water Hole High Stakes Golf Hole In One Laws Of Golf Men’s Golf Rules Navy Golf Course for Aircraft Carriers Only Need One Golf Ball Outback Golf Course PARfect Golf Senior’s Golf Cart Son Braggarts on the Golf Course They Found Your Balls Voodoo Golf Tree World’s Hardest Golf Shot |
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