Monk’s Fish And Chip Stand

How to help cash flow problems at a monastery


A monastery in the English countryside was having a hard time with its cash flow because of the dwindling number of monks available to help with all the work.

Then one day two of the monks, who had been discussing the problem, suggested they open a fish and chips stand down on the highway, right next to a scenic vista area popular with tourists. The other monks agreed, and the two put up the stand.

One day a tourist who wanted to offer a compliment asked the monk on duty, “Are you the fish friar?”

“No, sir,” retorted the brother, “I’m the chip monk.”


QuotaBills
Religion altars the mind. - Tony Follari

Only dead fish swim with the stream. - Malcolm Muggeridge

Profit: Religious guy who talks to God - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Cantaloupe: Got to get married in Church - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Fish and visitors stink after three days. - Benjamin Franklin

Be patient and calm; no one can catch a fish with anger. - Herbert Hoover

Retire to what? I already play golf and fish for a living. - Julius Boros

When it is a matter of money, all men are of the same religion. - Voltaire

A rigorous religion can be conceived and nurtured in ignorance. - Ravi Zacharias

Habitat: Place where a particular species of fish was last week - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

If men are so wicked with religion, what would they be without it? - Benjamin Franklin

Science is a differential equation. Religion is a boundary condition. - Alan Turing

Ideal Summer Resort: A place where fish bite and mosquitoes don't - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I once heard a preacher who sorely tempted me to go to church no more. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

A thorough knowledge of the Bible is worth more than a college education. - Theodore Roosevelt

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult. - Rita Rudner

Clement Attlee reminds me of a dead fish before it has had time to stiffen. - George Orwell

What you need is somebody new - there's more than 1 fish in the woodpile. - Archie Bunker

Democracy is also a form of religion; it is the worship of jackals by jackasses. - H L Mencken

Is this chicken or is this fish? I know it's tuna but it says chicken of the sea. - Jessica Simpson

I went fishing with Rod Ewert. He was using a dotted line. He caught every other fish. - Steven Wright

They laughed at Robert Fulton but without him, New York wouldn't have a fish market. - Archie Bunker

The less Holy Spirit we have, the more cake and coffee we need to keep the church going. - Reinhard Bonnke

The best way to knock the chip off your neighbor's shoulder is to pat him on the back. - Unknown

If religion is to be treated with intellectual respect, then it must stand the test of truth. - Ravi Zacharias

Are you saying that the Rebel Alliance were religious terrorists and Yoda was a benefit cheat? - Dave Turner

Most religious people accept medicine as a gift from God and reap the benefits of both realms. - Caroline Fraser

Model Wife: One who, when she spades the garden, picks up the fish worms and saves them for her husband - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

He made us all one true religion, Edith, which he named after his son, Christian - or Christ, for short. - Archie Bunker

Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong, even though they say it's okay in the Bible. - Homer Simpson

The task of organized religion is not to prove that God was in the 1st century, but that he is in the 20th. - S.H. Miller

I've always loved yoga because you get to connect to a deep religious truth while stretching your legs. - Katya Zamolodchikova

It is our art that has an opportunity to leave a footprint in the sand. They don't wrap fish in our work. - Hugh N Jacobsen

I refuse to believe that trading recipes is silly. Tuna-fish casserole is at least as real as corporate stock. - Barbara Harrison

The bulletin board on the lawn of a New Jersey Church reads "We reserve the right to accept everybody." - John Kazmark

You must mind and not lower the Church in people's eyes by seeming to be frightened about it for such a little thing. - George Eliot

Unsporting: Any fishing technique that has as its chief object the capture of fish rather than the accumulation of fishing equipment - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Ultimately, America's answer to the intolerant man is diversity, the very diversity which our heritage of religious freedom has inspired. - Robert F. Kennedy

I you can make any leading religion of the world look like complete nonsense, you can be sure of only one thing: you haven't understood it. - Wilfred Cantwell Smith

To say that authority, whether secular or religious, supplies no ground for morality is not to deny the obvious fact that it supplies a sanction. - Joseph Addison


see also   Christmas  &  Religious  Sections
Celebate or Celebrate?
Chipwrecked
Friar Thumper
Gambling Chips
Greek Monk
Monk On A Rope
Monk’s Christmas Vow
Monk’s Story
Silent Monks Singing Hallelujah
Tiny Monks

 

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29-Nov-2021