Monk’s Fish And Chip Stand

How to help cash flow problems at a monastery


A monastery in the English countryside was having a hard time with its cash flow because of the dwindling number of monks available to help with all the work.

Then one day two of the monks, who had been discussing the problem, suggested they open a fish and chips stand down on the highway, right next to a scenic vista area popular with tourists. The other monks agreed, and the two put up the stand.

One day a tourist who wanted to offer a compliment asked the monk on duty, “Are you the fish friar?”

“No, sir,” retorted the brother, “I’m the chip monk.”


QuotaBills
Man is incurably religious. - Ravi Zacharias

There's always a bigger fish. - Qui-Gon Jinn

Paraffins: Found on sides of fish - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Cantaloupe: Got to get married in Church - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

That Meathead calls me a religious phonetic. - Archie Bunker

Superstition is the religion of feeble minds. - Edmund Burke

No good fish goes anywhere without a porpoise. - Lewis Carroll

Electric Eel: Fish that thrives in strong currents - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Of all the bad men, religious bad men are the worst. - C S Lewis

One can think of life after the fish is in the canoe. - Hawaii Proverb

Where God has his church, the Devil will have his chapel. - Spanish Proverb

True religion is the life we lead, not the creed we profess. - Louis Nizer

When you fish for love, bait with your heart, not your brain. - Mark Twain

To be born in India is to arrive into the world swimming in religion. - Ravi Zacharias

There is only one religion, though there are a hundred versions of it. - George Bernard Shaw

No human being, however great or powerful, was ever so free as a fish. - John Ruskin

I once heard a preacher who sorely tempted me to go to church no more. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Govern a great nation as you would cook a small fish. Do not overdo it. - Lao Tzu

My religious background is that my mother is a Christian Dior Scientist. - Robin Williams

A dead fish can float downstream, but it takes a live one to swim upstream. - WC Fields

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult. - Rita Rudner

Fishing is boring, unless you catch an actual fish, and then it is disgusting. - Dave Barry

Democracy is also a form of religion; it is the worship of jackals by jackasses. - H L Mencken

I won't take my religion from any man who never works except with his mouth. - Carl Sandburg

A sense of humor, properly developed, is superior to any religion so far devised. - Tom Robbins

You can always borrow a corkscrew from a member of the Protestant Episcopal Church. - Chauncey Depew

A religion that gives nothing, costs nothing, and suffers nothing, is worth nothing. - Martin Luther

The best way to knock the chip off your neighbor's shoulder is to pat him on the back. - Unknown

Religion is like a map. The route isn't important. It's the destination that matters. - Marianne Williamson

Your daily life is your temple and your religion. Whenever you enter into it take with you your all. - Kahlil Gibran

Like a great Eastern religion says, it's all about striking a balance between the ping and the pong. - Kelly

The world says everything happens randomly, without reason. But the Bible reassures us that God works in all things. - David Jeremiah

Fish who are caught and released are like the aquatic equivalent of people who claim to have been abducted by aliens. - Bill Murray

Don't tell fish stories where the people know you; but particularly, don't tell them where they know the fish. - Mark Twain

It ain't those parts of the Bible that I can't understand that bother me, it is the parts that I do understand. - Mark Twain

Only when the last tree has withered, and the last fish caught, and the last river been poisoned, will we realize we cannot eat money. - Cree Proverb

Religion is something left over from the infancy of our intelligence, it will fade away as we adopt reason and science as our guidelines. - Bertrand Russell

I ain't got no respect for no religion where the head guy claims he can't make no mistakes. Like he's, waddya call, inflammable. - Archie Bunker

Memory is a net: one finds it full of fish when he takes it from the brook, but a dozen miles of water have run through it without sticking. - Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr.

Starbucks says they are going to start putting religious quotes on cups. The very first one will say, 'Jesus! This cup is expensive!' - Conan O'Brien


see also   Christmas  &  Religious  Sections
Celebate or Celebrate?
Chipwrecked
Friar Thumper
Gambling Chips
Greek Monk
Monk On A Rope
Monk’s Christmas Vow
Monk’s Story
Silent Monks Singing Hallelujah
Tiny Monks

 

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16-Apr-2021