Budget: a way of going broke methodically. - Groucho Marx

I grew up working in Canada so everything was low budget. - Ellen Page

Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks. - Steven Wright

I think crime pays. The hours are good, and you travel a lot. - Woody Allen

It is now possible for a flight attendant to get a pilot pregnant. - Richard J. Ferris

I don't own a camera, so I travel with a police sketch artist. - George Carlin

Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines. - Steven Wright

Something in the air this morning made me feel like flying... Spring Flight - Eileen Granfors

In America there are two classes of travel - first class, and with children. - Robert Benchley

Not the cry, but the flight of a wild duck, leads the flock to fly and follow. - Chinese Proverb

Airplane travel is nature's way of making you look like your passport photo. - Al Gore

A lie can travel halfway around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes. - Mark Twain

Too often travel, instead of broadening the mind, merely lengthens the conversation. - Elizabeth Drew

I like the map feature on the iPhone that tells me where I am, because I travel a lot. - Gary Shteyngart

Education doesn't change life much. It just lifts trouble to a higher plane of regard. - Robert Frost

Why endeavor to straighten the road of life? The faster we travel, the less there is to see. - Helen Hayes

People travel to faraway places to watch, in fascination, the kind of people they ignore at home. - Dagobert D. Runes

Though we travel the world over to find the beautiful, we must carry it with us or we find it not. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

With every bathroom renovation, there are three areas that I focus on: budget, function and style. - Candice Olson

I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read in the train. - Oscar Wilde

Music gives a soul to the universe, wings to the mind, flight to the imagination, and life to everything. - Plato

The scientific theory I like best is that the rings of Saturn are composed entirely of lost airline luggage. - Mark Russell

I am the astronaut of boxing. Joe Louis and Jack Dempsey were just jet pilots. I'm in a world of my own. - Muhammad Ali

I travel without barely any luggage. Just a second set of underwear and binoculars and a map and a toothbrush. - Werner Herzog

Servers make very little in regular wages and largely rely on tips to pay the bills and budget for weeks ahead. - Kevin McCarthy

For my part, I travel not to go anywhere, but to go. I travel for travel's sake. The great affair is to move. - Robert Louis Stevenson

When everything seems to be going against you, remember that the airplane takes off against the wind, not with it. - Henry Ford

Travel is more than the seeing of sights; it is a change that goes on, deep and permanent, in the ideas of living. - Miriam Beard

A tom cat hijacked a plane, stuck a pistol into the pilot's ribs and demanded, "Take me to the Canaries." - Bob Monkhouse

Oh my. Space travel sounds rather perilous. I can assure you they will never get me on one of those dreadful Star Ships. - C-3PO

Bruce Lee's fast pace, Jet Li's pretty style and Jet Li's acrobatics combine with Muay Thai for my own style. - Tony Jaa

It is impossible to travel faster than the speed of light, and certainly not desirable, as one's hat keeps blowing off. - Woody Allen

Own only what you can always carry with you: know languages, know countries, know people. Let your memory be your travel bag. - Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn

Every street in London has a camera, and if you ever travel up the M4, it feels as if George Orwell should be your chauffeur. - Don McCullin

The whole object of travel is not to set foot on foreign land; it is at last to set foot on one's own country as a foreign land. - G K Chesterton

If Beethoven had been killed in a plane crash at the age of twenty-two, it would have changed the history of music... and of aviation. - Tom Stoppard

As a travel writer I've specialized in gritty, fearful destinations, the kind of places that make a reader's hair stick on end. - Tahir Shah

Southwest Airlines is successful because the company understands it's a customer service company. It also happens to be an airline. - Harvey Mackay

If the "black box" flight recorder is never damaged during a plane crash, why isn't the whole airplane made out of that stuff? - George Carlin

When you travel, remember that a foreign country is not designed to make you comfortable. It is designed to make its own people comfortable. - Clifton Fadiman