Stabity Stab Stab
Fighting a losing cause with whatever you’ve got

A young soldier, just before battle, told his sergeant that he didn’t have a rifle.
“That’s no problem, son,” said the sergeant. “Here, take this broom. Just point it at the Germans, and go ‘Bangety Bang Bang’.”
“But what about a bayonet, Sarge?” asked the young (and gullible) recruit.
The sergeant pulls a piece of straw from the end of the broom, and attaches it to the handle end. “Here, use this... just go, ‘Stabity Stab Stab’.”

The recruit ends up alone on the battlefield, holding just his broom. Suddenly, a German soldier charges at him.
The recruit points the broom. “Bangety Bang Bang!” The German falls dead. More Germans appear. The recruit, amazed at his good luck, goes “Bangety Bang Bang! Stabity Stab Stab!” He mows down the enemy by the dozens.
Finally, the battlefield is clear, except for one German soldier walking slowly toward him. “Bangety Bang Bang!” shouts the recruit.
The German keeps coming.
“Bangety Bang Bang!” repeats the recruit, to no avail. He gets desperate. “Bangety Bang Bang! Stabity Stab Stab!”

It’s no use. The German keeps coming. He stomps the recruit into the ground, and says...
“Tankety Tank Tank.”


What happens when both sides have no weapons...

QuotaBills
My life is my message. - Mohandas Gandhi

Ordinary tradegies of war - Archie Bunker

The law is silent during war. - Cicero

Politics is war by other measures. - Steve Bannon

In war, truth is the first casualty. - Aeschylus

A man-of-war is the best ambassador. - Oliver Cromwell

Great is the guilt of an unnecessary war. - John Adams

The quickest way of ending a war is to lose it. - George Orwell

Make love, not war... or get married and do both. - Unknown

When the rich wage war, it's the poor who die. - Jean-Paul Sartre

I now close my military career and just fade away. - Douglas MacArthur

In war there is no second prize for the runner-up. - Omar Bradley

You furnish the pictures. I'll furnish the war. - William Randolph Hearst

Sometime they'll give a war and nobody will come. - Carl Sandburg

War does not determine who is right - only who is left. - Bertrand Russell

The United States has much to offer the Third World War. - Ronald Reagan

Is that a gun in your pocket, or are you just glad to see me? - Mae West

Where some states have an army, the Prussian army has a state. - Voltaire

Military justice is to justice what military music is to music. - Groucho Marx

When starting and waging war it is not right that matters, but victory. - Adolf Hitler

A standing army is one of the greatest mischiefs that can possibly happen. - James Madison

Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you. - Mary Bly

Two armies that fight each other is like one large army that commits suicide. - Henri Barbusse

It's better to have a gun and need it, than to not have a gun and not need it. - Ricky

He's talking another war, an old war, ya know, 1812, the one between the states. - Archie Bunker

A gun is not a weapon, it’s a tool, like a hammer or a screwdriver or an alligator. - Homer Simpson

Statistics have shown that mortality increases perceptibly in the military during wartime. - Alphonse Allais

For a war to be just three conditions are necessary - public authority, just cause, right motive. - Ernest Hemingway

During World War II children were not allowed to trick or treat because there was a sugar shortage. - Linda Bozzo

Bob War: (Southern) A sharp, twisted cable. Usage: 'Boy, stay away from that bob war fence.' - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

They have gun control in Cuba. They have universal health care in Cuba. So why do they want to come here? - Paul Harvey

The Internet has turned what used to be a controlled, one-way message into a real-time dialogue with millions. - Danielle Sacks

To an entrepreneur, closing a financing often feels like the end of a marathon. It's actually the starting gun. - Andy Dunn

Frankly, I'd like to see the government get out of war altogether and leave the whole field to private industry. - Joseph Heller

Dieting is not a sprint, it's a marathon. If you celebrate the small victories, you will eventually win the war. - Ian K Smith

When you say justice, it doesn't have to be war. Justice could just be clearing a path for people to dream properly. - Kanye West

Does America really need to be the best at everything? You already dominate the world in economics, military power and obesity. - Trevor Noah

We discern across the centuries a commanding and versatile intelligence, wielding with equal force the sword of war and of justice. - Winston Churchill

As long as war is regarded as wicked, it will always have its fascination. When it is looked upon as vulgar, it will cease to be popular. - Oscar Wilde

People think that at the top there isn't much room. They tend to think of it as an Everest. My message is that there is tons of room at the top. - Margaret Thatcher


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21-Oct-2021