Stabity Stab Stab
Fighting a losing cause with whatever you’ve got

A young soldier, just before battle, told his sergeant that he didn’t have a rifle.
“That’s no problem, son,” said the sergeant. “Here, take this broom. Just point it at the Germans, and go ‘Bangety Bang Bang’.”
“But what about a bayonet, Sarge?” asked the young (and gullible) recruit.
The sergeant pulls a piece of straw from the end of the broom, and attaches it to the handle end. “Here, use this... just go, ‘Stabity Stab Stab’.”

The recruit ends up alone on the battlefield, holding just his broom. Suddenly, a German soldier charges at him.
The recruit points the broom. “Bangety Bang Bang!” The German falls dead. More Germans appear. The recruit, amazed at his good luck, goes “Bangety Bang Bang! Stabity Stab Stab!” He mows down the enemy by the dozens.
Finally, the battlefield is clear, except for one German soldier walking slowly toward him. “Bangety Bang Bang!” shouts the recruit.
The German keeps coming.
“Bangety Bang Bang!” repeats the recruit, to no avail. He gets desperate. “Bangety Bang Bang! Stabity Stab Stab!”

It’s no use. The German keeps coming. He stomps the recruit into the ground, and says...
“Tankety Tank Tank.”


What happens when both sides have no weapons...

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My life is my message. - Mohandas Gandhi

Drill Sergeant: An army dentist. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Police do not belong in war zones. - Daniel K Moran

War hath no fury like a non-combatant. - Charles E Montague

Don't win a battle and lose the war. - Unknown

If we don't end war, war will end us. - H G Wells

Marketing strategy is a lot like military strategy. - Liddell Hart

You furnish the pictures. I'll furnish the war. - William Randolph Hearst

The end move in politics is always to pick up a gun. - R Buckminster Fuller

War is only a cowardly escape from the problems of peace. - Thomas Mann

Marriage is the only war in which you sleep with the enemy. - Francois de La Rochefoucauld

The true champion loses many battles before winning the war. - Unknown

A Canadian is sort of like an American, but without the gun. - Unknown

You may not be interested in war, but war is interested in you. - Leon Trotsky

Sometimes by losing a battle you find a new way to win the war. - Donald Trump

War has rules, mud wrestling has rules - politics has no rules. - Ross Perot

World War II was the last government program that really worked. - George Will

Take the diplomacy out of war and the thing would fall flat in a week. - Will Rogers

Every child comes with the message that God is not yet discouraged of man. - Rabindranath Tagore

Your heaviest artillery will be your will to live. Keep that big gun going. - Norman Cousins

Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you. - Mary Bly

A piece of spaghetti or a military unit can only be led from the front end. - George S Patton

Two armies that fight each other is like one large army that commits suicide. - Henri Barbusse

There's something fundamentally wrong with bringing a knife to a gun fight. - Sean Connery

Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you later. - Unknown

A gun is not a weapon, it’s a tool, like a hammer or a screwdriver or an alligator. - Homer Simpson

If it weren't for the Japanese and Germans, we wouldn't have any good war movies. - Stanley Ross

You can't say civilization don't advance... for every war they kill you a new way. - Will Rogers

'Jihad' can mean holy war to extremists, but it means struggle to the average Muslim. - Feisal Abdul Rauf

I must study politics and war that my sons may have the liberty to study mathematics and philosophy. - John Adams

Only when holiness and worship meet can evil be conquered. For that, only the Christian message has the answer. - Ravi Zacharias

Every happening, great and small, is a parable whereby God speaks to us, and the art of life is to get the message. - Malcolm Muggeridge

The fascination of shooting as a sport depends almost wholly on whether you are at the right or wrong end of the gun. - P G Wodehouse

When you say justice, it doesn't have to be war. Justice could just be clearing a path for people to dream properly. - Kanye West

But here's what I've learned in this war, in this country, in this city: to love the miracle of having been born. - Oriana Fallaci

The only difference between a pigeon and the American farmer today is that a pigeon can still make a deposit on a John Deere. - Jim Hightower

Let me put it this way. Canada is not so much a country as a holding tank filled with the disgruntled progeny of defeated peoples. - Mordecai Richler

Paul Revere was warning the British about gun control, and George Washington apparently was crossing the Delaware to bomb an abortion clinic. - Bill Maher

I like a quiet evening with family or friends over, great food and great discussion, and a lot of laughter. That's really what fills my tank. - Anna Eshoo

People think that at the top there isn't much room. They tend to think of it as an Everest. My message is that there is tons of room at the top. - Margaret Thatcher


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25-Jul-2021