For his wife’s birthday party, a Doctor ordered a cake with this inscription:
You are not getting older.
You are just getting better.
Asked how he wanted the message arranged, he said, “Just put ‘You are not getting older’ at the top and ‘You are just getting better’ at the bottom.”
It wasn’t until the good Doctor was ready to serve the cake that he discovered that the cake read:
YOU ARE NOT GETTING OLDER AT THE TOP.
YOU ARE JUST GETTING BETTER AT THE BOTTOM.
Chocolate cake is the bomb! - Scarlett Pomers
Gangrene: To be feeling sick - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Every disease is a physician. - Irish Proverb
Life is too short to skip cake. - Unknown
I think I can wipe out diabetes. - Robert Atkins
Diabetes is caused by melancholy. - Thomas Willis
Society is a hospital of incurables. - Ralph Waldo Emerson
Live everyday like its your birthday. - Paris Hilton
No medicine cures what happiness cannot. - Gabriel G Marquez
The way a doctor writes out a subscription. - Archie Bunker
Nurses are the hospitality of the hospital. - Carrie Latet
Time is a physician that heals every grief. - Diphilus
Cake is the answer, no matter the question. - Unknown
The last birthday that's any good is 23. - Andy Rooney
The doctors X-rayed my head an found nothing. - Dizzy Dean
Space ails us moderns: we are sick with space. - Robert Frost
New Year's Day is every man's birthday. - Charles Lamb
The doctor is to be feared more than the disease. - French Proverb
A little chocolate a day keeps the doctor at bay. - Marcia Carrington
When I first found out I had diabetes I denied it. - Nell Carter
Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died. - Erma Bombeck
I always say shopping is cheaper than a psychiatrist. - Tammy Faye Bakker
Nursing would be a dream job if there were no doctors. - Gerhard Kocher
Hope is medicine for a soul that's sick and tired. - Eric Swensson
Though physician to others, yet himself full of sores. - Latin Proverb
A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running. - Groucho Marx
No man is a good doctor who has never been sick himself. - Chinese Proverb
Medicine sometimes snatches away health, sometimes gives it. - Ovid
Trips to the dentist - I like to postpone that kind of thing. - Johnny Depp
Medicine is a science of uncertainty and an art of probability. - William Osler
Fond of lawsuits, little wealth; fond of doctors, little health. - Hebrew Proverb
"Let 'em eat cake," to quote the late Mark Antonette. - Archie Bunker
There is no curing a sick man who believes himself to be in health. - Henri Amiel
I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body. - Winston Bennett
NyQuil on the rocks, for when you're feeling sick but sociable. - Mitch Hedberg
The best way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once. - E. Joseph Cossman
The worst thing about medicine is that one kind makes another necessary. - Elbert Hubbard
Doctors think a lot of patients are cured who have simply quit in disgust. - Don Herold
We do have a zeal for laughter in most situations, give or take a dentist. - Joseph Heller
A nice creamy chocolate cake does a lot for a lot of people; it does for me. - Audrey Hepburn
When it comes to plastic surgery and sushi, never be attracted by a bargain. - Graham Norton
Faith and knowledge lean largely upon each other in the practice of medicine. - Peter Mere Latham
To array a man's will against his sickness is the supreme art of medicine. - Henry Ward Beecher
He's the best physician that knows the worthlessness of the most medicines. - Benjamin Franklin
The doctors can cure all sorts of ills, except the shock of doctors' bills. - Unknown
Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice"? - George Carlin
My favourite place to eat is my grandma's kitchen. She makes a mean crab cake. - Karlie Kloss
The art of medicine consists in amusing the patient while nature cures the disease. - Voltaire
Poisons and medicine are oftentimes the same substance given with different intents. - Peter Mere Latham
The only medicine for suffering, crime, and all the other woes of mankind, is wisdom. - Thomas Huxley
If you want to get out of medicine the fullest enjoyment, be students all your lives. - David Riesman
As a child, I always chose a false nose and some face paint and a wig for my birthday. - Ashley Jensen
Vegetables are a must on a diet. I suggest carrot cake, zucchini bread and pumpkin pie. - Jim Davis
I'm having difficulty getting the doctors around here to sign the appropriate form. - Spike Milligan
We have always said that advertising is just the icing on the cake. It is not the cake. - Meg Whitman
Psychiatry enables us to correct our faults by confessing our parents' shortcomings. - Laurence J Peter
Physiology is the stepchild of medicine. That is why Cinderella often turns out the queen. - Martin H. Fischer
A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age. - Robert Frost
Constant attention by a good nurse may be just as important as a major operation by a surgeon. - Dag Hammarskjold
A bad review is like baking a cake with all the best ingredients and having someone sit on it. - Danielle Steel
We're really just the frosting on a cake and we don't know what's inside the cake. - Adam Riess
My wife hasn't had a birthday in 4 years. She was born in the year of our Lord-only-knows. - Unknown
Most religious people accept medicine as a gift from God and reap the benefits of both realms. - Caroline Fraser
Everything slows down with age. Except the time it takes cake and ice cream to reach your hips. - John Wagner
Diabetes occurs at twice the rate in the African American community as it does in white Americans. - Xavier Becerra
Medicine, the only profession that labours incessantly to destroy the reason for its own existence. - James Bryce
If Joan of Arc could turn the tide of an entire war before her 18th birthday, you can get out of bed. - E. Jean Carroll
The only equipment lack in the modern hospital? Somebody to meet you at the entrance with a handshake! - Martin H. Fischer
To argue with a person who has renounced the use of reason is like administering medicine to the dead. - Thomas Paine
Many people find themselves with illness as they become successful: higher blood pressure and diabetes. - Zong Qinghou
Psychiatry is the art of teaching people how to stand on their own two feet while reclining on couches. - Sigmund Freud
I was determined to share my positive approach and not let diabetes stand in the way of enjoying my life. - Paula Deen
Kindness and a generous spirit go a long way. And a sense of humor. It's like medicine - very healing. - Max Irons
One in four kids have either pre-diabetes or diabetes - what I like to call diabesity. How did this happen? - Mark Hyman
The doctor sees all the weakness of mankind, the lawyer all the wickedness, the theologian all the stupidity. - Arthur Schopenhauer
You go to a psychiatrist when you're slightly cracked and keep going until you're completely cracked. - Unknown
Dear Diamond,
We all know who is really a girl's best friend.
Yours sincerely,
Chocolate Cake - Unknown
Thank you to all who posted kind birthday wishes. I'm touched. The rest of you will be un-friended tomorrow. - Unknown
The public needs to know - they need to know as much about atrial fibrillation as they do about cancer and diabetes. - Barry Manilow
There is no medicine like hope, no incentive so great, and no tonic so powerful as expectation of something tomorrow. - Orison Swett Marden
The doctor may also learn more about the illness from the way the patient tells the story than from the story itself. - James B. Herrick
The best doctor in the world is a veterinarian. He can't ask his patients what is the matter - he's got to know. - Will Rogers
Albert Schweitzer's philosophy is that a sick, miserable African of today can be a strong healthy cannibal tomorrow. - Joe E Lewis
It is astonishing with how little reading a doctor can practice medicine, but is not astonishing how badly he may do it. - William Osler
Medicine is the restoration of discordant elements; sickness is the discord of the elements infused into the living body. - Leonardo da Vinci
Each patient ought to feel somewhat the better after the physician's visit, irrespective of the nature of the illness. - Warfield Theobald Longcope
To the person with a toothache, even if the world is tottering, there is nothing more important than a visit to a dentist. - George Bernard Shaw
Health is the state about which medicine has nothing to say; sanctity is the state about which theology has nothing to say. - W H Auden
I'm planning to adopt a dog soon. It wasn't my first choice but my Doctor told me I can't have any biologically. - Bill Murray
I like to eat pizza and spaghetti pomodoro, and I'm crazy for dessert. I like all of them: cassata, cheesecake, biscuits. - Stefano Gabbana
Only one rule in medical ethics need concern you: that action on your part which best conserves the interest of your patient. - Martin H. Fischer
It is reasonable to expect the doctor to recognize that science may not have all the answers to problems of health and healing. - Norman Cousins
I've got a great doctor. He gave a guy six months to live. They couldn't pay his bill so he gave him another six months. - Henny Youngman
The art of healing comes from nature, not from the physician. Therefore the physician must start from nature, with an open mind. - Paracelsus
Sometimes, giving up your privacy is a little like going to the dentist and we have let him have access that no one's ever had. - Tom Petty
Lost wealth may be replaced by industry; lost knowledge by study; lost health by temperance or medicine; but lost time is gone forever. - Samuel Smiles
When enough people care about autism or diabetes or global warming, it helps everyone, even if only a tiny fraction actively participate. - Seth Godin
With my wife I don't get no respect. I made a toast on her birthday to "the best woman a man ever had." The waiter joined me. - Rodney Dangerfield
You've heard of people calling in sick. You may have called in sick a few times yourself. But have you ever thought about calling in well? - Tom Robbins
In other industries, value is defined by the ultimate stakeholder - the one who benefits, or not, from the service. We should do the same in medicine. - Dave deBronkart
Gangrene: To be feeling sick - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Every disease is a physician. - Irish Proverb
Life is too short to skip cake. - Unknown
I think I can wipe out diabetes. - Robert Atkins
Diabetes is caused by melancholy. - Thomas Willis
Society is a hospital of incurables. - Ralph Waldo Emerson
Live everyday like its your birthday. - Paris Hilton
No medicine cures what happiness cannot. - Gabriel G Marquez
The way a doctor writes out a subscription. - Archie Bunker
Nurses are the hospitality of the hospital. - Carrie Latet
Time is a physician that heals every grief. - Diphilus
Cake is the answer, no matter the question. - Unknown
The last birthday that's any good is 23. - Andy Rooney
The doctors X-rayed my head an found nothing. - Dizzy Dean
Space ails us moderns: we are sick with space. - Robert Frost
New Year's Day is every man's birthday. - Charles Lamb
The doctor is to be feared more than the disease. - French Proverb
A little chocolate a day keeps the doctor at bay. - Marcia Carrington
When I first found out I had diabetes I denied it. - Nell Carter
Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died. - Erma Bombeck
I always say shopping is cheaper than a psychiatrist. - Tammy Faye Bakker
Nursing would be a dream job if there were no doctors. - Gerhard Kocher
Hope is medicine for a soul that's sick and tired. - Eric Swensson
Though physician to others, yet himself full of sores. - Latin Proverb
A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running. - Groucho Marx
No man is a good doctor who has never been sick himself. - Chinese Proverb
Medicine sometimes snatches away health, sometimes gives it. - Ovid
Trips to the dentist - I like to postpone that kind of thing. - Johnny Depp
Medicine is a science of uncertainty and an art of probability. - William Osler
Fond of lawsuits, little wealth; fond of doctors, little health. - Hebrew Proverb
"Let 'em eat cake," to quote the late Mark Antonette. - Archie Bunker
There is no curing a sick man who believes himself to be in health. - Henri Amiel
I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body. - Winston Bennett
NyQuil on the rocks, for when you're feeling sick but sociable. - Mitch Hedberg
The best way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once. - E. Joseph Cossman
The worst thing about medicine is that one kind makes another necessary. - Elbert Hubbard
Doctors think a lot of patients are cured who have simply quit in disgust. - Don Herold
We do have a zeal for laughter in most situations, give or take a dentist. - Joseph Heller
A nice creamy chocolate cake does a lot for a lot of people; it does for me. - Audrey Hepburn
When it comes to plastic surgery and sushi, never be attracted by a bargain. - Graham Norton
Faith and knowledge lean largely upon each other in the practice of medicine. - Peter Mere Latham
To array a man's will against his sickness is the supreme art of medicine. - Henry Ward Beecher
He's the best physician that knows the worthlessness of the most medicines. - Benjamin Franklin
The doctors can cure all sorts of ills, except the shock of doctors' bills. - Unknown
Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice"? - George Carlin
My favourite place to eat is my grandma's kitchen. She makes a mean crab cake. - Karlie Kloss
The art of medicine consists in amusing the patient while nature cures the disease. - Voltaire
Poisons and medicine are oftentimes the same substance given with different intents. - Peter Mere Latham
The only medicine for suffering, crime, and all the other woes of mankind, is wisdom. - Thomas Huxley
If you want to get out of medicine the fullest enjoyment, be students all your lives. - David Riesman
As a child, I always chose a false nose and some face paint and a wig for my birthday. - Ashley Jensen
Vegetables are a must on a diet. I suggest carrot cake, zucchini bread and pumpkin pie. - Jim Davis
I'm having difficulty getting the doctors around here to sign the appropriate form. - Spike Milligan
We have always said that advertising is just the icing on the cake. It is not the cake. - Meg Whitman
Psychiatry enables us to correct our faults by confessing our parents' shortcomings. - Laurence J Peter
Physiology is the stepchild of medicine. That is why Cinderella often turns out the queen. - Martin H. Fischer
A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age. - Robert Frost
Constant attention by a good nurse may be just as important as a major operation by a surgeon. - Dag Hammarskjold
A bad review is like baking a cake with all the best ingredients and having someone sit on it. - Danielle Steel
We're really just the frosting on a cake and we don't know what's inside the cake. - Adam Riess
My wife hasn't had a birthday in 4 years. She was born in the year of our Lord-only-knows. - Unknown
Most religious people accept medicine as a gift from God and reap the benefits of both realms. - Caroline Fraser
Everything slows down with age. Except the time it takes cake and ice cream to reach your hips. - John Wagner
Diabetes occurs at twice the rate in the African American community as it does in white Americans. - Xavier Becerra
Medicine, the only profession that labours incessantly to destroy the reason for its own existence. - James Bryce
If Joan of Arc could turn the tide of an entire war before her 18th birthday, you can get out of bed. - E. Jean Carroll
The only equipment lack in the modern hospital? Somebody to meet you at the entrance with a handshake! - Martin H. Fischer
To argue with a person who has renounced the use of reason is like administering medicine to the dead. - Thomas Paine
Many people find themselves with illness as they become successful: higher blood pressure and diabetes. - Zong Qinghou
Psychiatry is the art of teaching people how to stand on their own two feet while reclining on couches. - Sigmund Freud
I was determined to share my positive approach and not let diabetes stand in the way of enjoying my life. - Paula Deen
Kindness and a generous spirit go a long way. And a sense of humor. It's like medicine - very healing. - Max Irons
One in four kids have either pre-diabetes or diabetes - what I like to call diabesity. How did this happen? - Mark Hyman
The doctor sees all the weakness of mankind, the lawyer all the wickedness, the theologian all the stupidity. - Arthur Schopenhauer
You go to a psychiatrist when you're slightly cracked and keep going until you're completely cracked. - Unknown
Dear Diamond,
We all know who is really a girl's best friend.
Yours sincerely,
Chocolate Cake - Unknown
Thank you to all who posted kind birthday wishes. I'm touched. The rest of you will be un-friended tomorrow. - Unknown
The public needs to know - they need to know as much about atrial fibrillation as they do about cancer and diabetes. - Barry Manilow
There is no medicine like hope, no incentive so great, and no tonic so powerful as expectation of something tomorrow. - Orison Swett Marden
The doctor may also learn more about the illness from the way the patient tells the story than from the story itself. - James B. Herrick
The best doctor in the world is a veterinarian. He can't ask his patients what is the matter - he's got to know. - Will Rogers
Albert Schweitzer's philosophy is that a sick, miserable African of today can be a strong healthy cannibal tomorrow. - Joe E Lewis
It is astonishing with how little reading a doctor can practice medicine, but is not astonishing how badly he may do it. - William Osler
Medicine is the restoration of discordant elements; sickness is the discord of the elements infused into the living body. - Leonardo da Vinci
Each patient ought to feel somewhat the better after the physician's visit, irrespective of the nature of the illness. - Warfield Theobald Longcope
To the person with a toothache, even if the world is tottering, there is nothing more important than a visit to a dentist. - George Bernard Shaw
Health is the state about which medicine has nothing to say; sanctity is the state about which theology has nothing to say. - W H Auden
I'm planning to adopt a dog soon. It wasn't my first choice but my Doctor told me I can't have any biologically. - Bill Murray
I like to eat pizza and spaghetti pomodoro, and I'm crazy for dessert. I like all of them: cassata, cheesecake, biscuits. - Stefano Gabbana
Only one rule in medical ethics need concern you: that action on your part which best conserves the interest of your patient. - Martin H. Fischer
It is reasonable to expect the doctor to recognize that science may not have all the answers to problems of health and healing. - Norman Cousins
I've got a great doctor. He gave a guy six months to live. They couldn't pay his bill so he gave him another six months. - Henny Youngman
The art of healing comes from nature, not from the physician. Therefore the physician must start from nature, with an open mind. - Paracelsus
Sometimes, giving up your privacy is a little like going to the dentist and we have let him have access that no one's ever had. - Tom Petty
Lost wealth may be replaced by industry; lost knowledge by study; lost health by temperance or medicine; but lost time is gone forever. - Samuel Smiles
When enough people care about autism or diabetes or global warming, it helps everyone, even if only a tiny fraction actively participate. - Seth Godin
With my wife I don't get no respect. I made a toast on her birthday to "the best woman a man ever had." The waiter joined me. - Rodney Dangerfield
You've heard of people calling in sick. You may have called in sick a few times yourself. But have you ever thought about calling in well? - Tom Robbins
In other industries, value is defined by the ultimate stakeholder - the one who benefits, or not, from the service. We should do the same in medicine. - Dave deBronkart
see also Birthday, Doctor & Marriage Sections
Bacon Birthday Cake
Big Birthday Surprise
Birthday Dog
Blonde’s Birthday Task
Cake Message
Centennial Puff
Cheap Birthday Card
Crowded Birthday Party
DJ Birthday
Doctor Types
Family Birthday Reminder
Hippy Birthday
Jurassic Judah
Perfect Birthday Excuse
Redneck Birthday Cake
Shark Week Birthday Cake
“Underneath That” Cake
Woodcutter Birthday Cake
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16-Jan-2021 |