For his wife’s birthday party, a Doctor ordered a cake with this inscription:
You are not getting older.
You are just getting better.
Asked how he wanted the message arranged, he said, “Just put ‘You are not getting older’ at the top and ‘You are just getting better’ at the bottom.”
It wasn’t until the good Doctor was ready to serve the cake that he discovered that the cake read:
YOU ARE NOT GETTING OLDER AT THE TOP.
YOU ARE JUST GETTING BETTER AT THE BOTTOM.
Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman - Christopher Walken
Quack: A duck's Doctor - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Grief is itself a medicine. - William Cowper
Maternity Hospital: An heirport - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Life is too short to skip cake. - Unknown
I think I can wipe out diabetes. - Robert Atkins
Drill Sergeant: An army dentist. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Diabetes is caused by melancholy. - Thomas Willis
Dentist Office: A filling station - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Diabetes is a lousy, lousy disease. - Elaine Stritch
A young doctor makes a humpy graveyard. - English Proverb
The best doctor gives the least medicines. - Benjamin Franklin
The last birthday that's any good is 23. - Andy Rooney
There is still no cure for the common birthday. - John Glenn
The doctor is to be feared more than the disease. - French Proverb
Why do the best doctors have the sickest patients? - Unknown
Let food be thy medicine and medicine be thy food. - Hippocrates
Three out of four doctors recommend another doctor. - Graffito
Somebody must get the incompetent lawyers and doctors. - George Bernard Shaw
Though physician to others, yet himself full of sores. - Latin Proverb
After two days in hospital I took a turn for the nurse. - WC Fields
I have friends struggling with autism, juvenile diabetes. - Nicole A. Parker
A sweating ovary or a sick prostate explains most history. - Martin H. Fischer
Once you get rid of integrity the rest is a piece of cake. - Larry Hagman
If we become ill, modern medicine can work healing miracles. - Joseph B Wirthlin
False Economy: using only 30 candles on her 40th birthday cake - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Because the sweeter the cake, the more bitter the jelly can be. - Lady Gaga
Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist should have his head examined. - Samuel Goldwyn
Fond of lawsuits, little wealth; fond of doctors, little health. - Hebrew Proverb
In a sick-room or a bed-room there should never be shutters shut. - Florence Nightingale
Medicine is only for those who cannot imagine doing anything else. - Luanda Grazette
The best way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once. - E. Joseph Cossman
If a patient cannot clean his teeth, no dentist can clean them for him. - Martin H. Fischer
The worst thing about medicine is that one kind makes another necessary. - Elbert Hubbard
My idea of baking is buying a ready-make cake mix and throwing in an egg. - Cilla Black
Doctors think a lot of patients are cured who have simply quit in disgust. - Don Herold
We do have a zeal for laughter in most situations, give or take a dentist. - Joseph Heller
I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead. Not sick - not wounded - dead. - Woody Allen
Apple: Nutritious lunchtime dessert which children will trade for cupcakes. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Observation, Reason, Human Understanding, Courage; these make the physician. - Martin H. Fischer
I told my dentist my teeth are going yellow. he told me to wear a brown tie. - Rodney Dangerfield
Faith and knowledge lean largely upon each other in the practice of medicine. - Peter Mere Latham
Doctors automatically know what's wrong with you. They have a sick sense. - Beau M
To array a man's will against his sickness is the supreme art of medicine. - Henry Ward Beecher
Always give them the old fire, even when you feel like a squashed cake of ice. - Ethel Merman
If you are too smart to pay the doctor, you had better be too smart to get ill. - African Proverb
The doctors can cure all sorts of ills, except the shock of doctors' bills. - Unknown
Oh, when I was a kid, I was ugly. When I was born, the doctor smacked my mother. - Rodney Dangerfield
Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice"? - George Carlin
I wanted to study to be a dental hygienist, marry a rich dentist, and hang it up. - Vicki Lawrence
When someone asks if you'd like cake or pie, why not say you want cake and pie? - Lisa Loeb
Diabetes is all about insulin levels and sugar levels and what you put in your body. - Jay Cutler
The only medicine for suffering, crime, and all the other woes of mankind, is wisdom. - Thomas Huxley
What clinical lectures I will give in heaven, demonstrating the ignorance of doctors! - Israel Zangwill
No, Doctor, I don't want to grow young again. I just want to keep on growing old. - Madame de Rothschild
The grinding of the intellect is for most people as painful as a dentist's drill. - Leonard Woolf
People pay the doctor for his trouble; for his kindness they still remain in his debt. - Seneca
As a child, I always chose a false nose and some face paint and a wig for my birthday. - Ashley Jensen
Vegetables are a must on a diet. I suggest carrot cake, zucchini bread and pumpkin pie. - Jim Davis
Success is like reaching an important birthday and finding you're exactly the same. - Audrey Hepburn
Life is not over because you have diabetes. Make the most of what you have, be grateful. - Dale Evans
The less Holy Spirit we have, the more cake and coffee we need to keep the church going. - Reinhard Bonnke
Stress exacerbates any problem, whether it's diabetes, heart trouble, MS, or whatever. - Mary Ann Mobley
Coaching doesn't make sick people well - it helps healthy people become extra-ordinary. - Thomas Leonard
I wonder why you can always read a Doctor's bill but you can never read his prescription. - Finley Peter Dunne
We're really just the frosting on a cake and we don't know what's inside the cake. - Adam Riess
My wife hasn't had a birthday in 4 years. She was born in the year of our Lord-only-knows. - Unknown
My doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for four. Unless there are three other people. - Orson Welles
The art of medicine consists of amusing the patient, whilst Mother Nature takes care of the cure. - Voltaire
German is the most extravagantly ugly language - it sounds like someone using a sick bag on a 747. - Willy Rushton
I'm beginning to have morning sickness. I'm not having a baby, I'm just sick of morning. - Phyllis Diller
When I was born the Doctor took one look at my face, turned me over and said, "Look, twins!" - Rodney Dangerfield
To argue with a person who has renounced the use of reason is like administering medicine to the dead. - Thomas Paine
Many people find themselves with illness as they become successful: higher blood pressure and diabetes. - Zong Qinghou
I've always been independent. I've always had courage. But I didn't always own my diabetes. - Mary Tyler Moore
A compromise is the art of dividing a cake in such a way that everyone believes he has the biggest piece. - Ludwig Erhard
I love being married. I was single for a long time, and I just got so sick of finishing my own sentences. - Brian Kiley
The Christian's Bible is a drug store. Its contents remain the same, but the medical practice changes. - Mark Twain
Kindness and a generous spirit go a long way. And a sense of humor. It's like medicine - very healing. - Max Irons
My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you're ugly too. - Rodney Dangerfield
One in four kids have either pre-diabetes or diabetes - what I like to call diabesity. How did this happen? - Mark Hyman
The doctor sees all the weakness of mankind, the lawyer all the wickedness, the theologian all the stupidity. - Arthur Schopenhauer
You go to a psychiatrist when you're slightly cracked and keep going until you're completely cracked. - Unknown
The abdomen, the chest, and the brain will forever be shut from the intrusion of the wise and humane surgeon. - Eric Ericksen
Most ballet teachers in the United States are terrible. If they were in medicine, everyone would be poisoned. - George Balanchine
My heart, which is so full to overflowing, has often been solaced and refreshed by music when sick and weary. - Martin Luther
What if the kid you bullied at school, grew up, and turned out to be the only surgeon who could save your life? - Lynette Mather
Recommending gastric bypass as a national solution for our diabetes epidemic is bad medicine and bad economics. - Mark Hyman
With some diseases, like type 2 diabetes, if people get alerted early, they can take steps to avert getting sick. - Elizabeth Holmes
There is no medicine like hope, no incentive so great, and no tonic so powerful as expectation of something tomorrow. - Orison Swett Marden
The doctor may also learn more about the illness from the way the patient tells the story than from the story itself. - James B. Herrick
Albert Schweitzer's philosophy is that a sick, miserable African of today can be a strong healthy cannibal tomorrow. - Joe E Lewis
My doctor recently told me that jogging could add years to my life. I think he was right. I feel ten years older already. - Milton Berle
My husband wanted one of those big-screen TVs for his birthday. So I just moved his chair closer to the one we have already. - Wendy Liebman
Trying to manage diabetes is hard because if you don't, there are consequences you'll have to deal with later in life. - Bryan Adams
It is reasonable to expect the doctor to recognize that science may not have all the answers to problems of health and healing. - Norman Cousins
Let no one suppose that the words doctor and patient can disguise from the parties the fact that they are employer and employee. - George Bernard Shaw
The art of healing comes from nature, not from the physician. Therefore the physician must start from nature, with an open mind. - Paracelsus
Lost wealth may be replaced by industry; lost knowledge by study; lost health by temperance or medicine; but lost time is gone forever. - Samuel Smiles
When you are called to a sick man, be sure you know what the matter is — if you do not know, nature can do a great deal better than you can guess. - Nicholas de Belleville
Quack: A duck's Doctor - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Grief is itself a medicine. - William Cowper
Maternity Hospital: An heirport - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Life is too short to skip cake. - Unknown
I think I can wipe out diabetes. - Robert Atkins
Drill Sergeant: An army dentist. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Diabetes is caused by melancholy. - Thomas Willis
Dentist Office: A filling station - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Diabetes is a lousy, lousy disease. - Elaine Stritch
A young doctor makes a humpy graveyard. - English Proverb
The best doctor gives the least medicines. - Benjamin Franklin
The last birthday that's any good is 23. - Andy Rooney
There is still no cure for the common birthday. - John Glenn
The doctor is to be feared more than the disease. - French Proverb
Why do the best doctors have the sickest patients? - Unknown
Let food be thy medicine and medicine be thy food. - Hippocrates
Three out of four doctors recommend another doctor. - Graffito
Somebody must get the incompetent lawyers and doctors. - George Bernard Shaw
Though physician to others, yet himself full of sores. - Latin Proverb
After two days in hospital I took a turn for the nurse. - WC Fields
I have friends struggling with autism, juvenile diabetes. - Nicole A. Parker
A sweating ovary or a sick prostate explains most history. - Martin H. Fischer
Once you get rid of integrity the rest is a piece of cake. - Larry Hagman
If we become ill, modern medicine can work healing miracles. - Joseph B Wirthlin
False Economy: using only 30 candles on her 40th birthday cake - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Because the sweeter the cake, the more bitter the jelly can be. - Lady Gaga
Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist should have his head examined. - Samuel Goldwyn
Fond of lawsuits, little wealth; fond of doctors, little health. - Hebrew Proverb
In a sick-room or a bed-room there should never be shutters shut. - Florence Nightingale
Medicine is only for those who cannot imagine doing anything else. - Luanda Grazette
The best way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once. - E. Joseph Cossman
If a patient cannot clean his teeth, no dentist can clean them for him. - Martin H. Fischer
The worst thing about medicine is that one kind makes another necessary. - Elbert Hubbard
My idea of baking is buying a ready-make cake mix and throwing in an egg. - Cilla Black
Doctors think a lot of patients are cured who have simply quit in disgust. - Don Herold
We do have a zeal for laughter in most situations, give or take a dentist. - Joseph Heller
I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead. Not sick - not wounded - dead. - Woody Allen
Apple: Nutritious lunchtime dessert which children will trade for cupcakes. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Observation, Reason, Human Understanding, Courage; these make the physician. - Martin H. Fischer
I told my dentist my teeth are going yellow. he told me to wear a brown tie. - Rodney Dangerfield
Faith and knowledge lean largely upon each other in the practice of medicine. - Peter Mere Latham
Doctors automatically know what's wrong with you. They have a sick sense. - Beau M
To array a man's will against his sickness is the supreme art of medicine. - Henry Ward Beecher
Always give them the old fire, even when you feel like a squashed cake of ice. - Ethel Merman
If you are too smart to pay the doctor, you had better be too smart to get ill. - African Proverb
The doctors can cure all sorts of ills, except the shock of doctors' bills. - Unknown
Oh, when I was a kid, I was ugly. When I was born, the doctor smacked my mother. - Rodney Dangerfield
Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice"? - George Carlin
I wanted to study to be a dental hygienist, marry a rich dentist, and hang it up. - Vicki Lawrence
When someone asks if you'd like cake or pie, why not say you want cake and pie? - Lisa Loeb
Diabetes is all about insulin levels and sugar levels and what you put in your body. - Jay Cutler
The only medicine for suffering, crime, and all the other woes of mankind, is wisdom. - Thomas Huxley
What clinical lectures I will give in heaven, demonstrating the ignorance of doctors! - Israel Zangwill
No, Doctor, I don't want to grow young again. I just want to keep on growing old. - Madame de Rothschild
The grinding of the intellect is for most people as painful as a dentist's drill. - Leonard Woolf
People pay the doctor for his trouble; for his kindness they still remain in his debt. - Seneca
As a child, I always chose a false nose and some face paint and a wig for my birthday. - Ashley Jensen
Vegetables are a must on a diet. I suggest carrot cake, zucchini bread and pumpkin pie. - Jim Davis
Success is like reaching an important birthday and finding you're exactly the same. - Audrey Hepburn
Life is not over because you have diabetes. Make the most of what you have, be grateful. - Dale Evans
The less Holy Spirit we have, the more cake and coffee we need to keep the church going. - Reinhard Bonnke
Stress exacerbates any problem, whether it's diabetes, heart trouble, MS, or whatever. - Mary Ann Mobley
Coaching doesn't make sick people well - it helps healthy people become extra-ordinary. - Thomas Leonard
I wonder why you can always read a Doctor's bill but you can never read his prescription. - Finley Peter Dunne
We're really just the frosting on a cake and we don't know what's inside the cake. - Adam Riess
My wife hasn't had a birthday in 4 years. She was born in the year of our Lord-only-knows. - Unknown
My doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for four. Unless there are three other people. - Orson Welles
The art of medicine consists of amusing the patient, whilst Mother Nature takes care of the cure. - Voltaire
German is the most extravagantly ugly language - it sounds like someone using a sick bag on a 747. - Willy Rushton
I'm beginning to have morning sickness. I'm not having a baby, I'm just sick of morning. - Phyllis Diller
When I was born the Doctor took one look at my face, turned me over and said, "Look, twins!" - Rodney Dangerfield
To argue with a person who has renounced the use of reason is like administering medicine to the dead. - Thomas Paine
Many people find themselves with illness as they become successful: higher blood pressure and diabetes. - Zong Qinghou
I've always been independent. I've always had courage. But I didn't always own my diabetes. - Mary Tyler Moore
A compromise is the art of dividing a cake in such a way that everyone believes he has the biggest piece. - Ludwig Erhard
I love being married. I was single for a long time, and I just got so sick of finishing my own sentences. - Brian Kiley
The Christian's Bible is a drug store. Its contents remain the same, but the medical practice changes. - Mark Twain
Kindness and a generous spirit go a long way. And a sense of humor. It's like medicine - very healing. - Max Irons
My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you're ugly too. - Rodney Dangerfield
One in four kids have either pre-diabetes or diabetes - what I like to call diabesity. How did this happen? - Mark Hyman
The doctor sees all the weakness of mankind, the lawyer all the wickedness, the theologian all the stupidity. - Arthur Schopenhauer
You go to a psychiatrist when you're slightly cracked and keep going until you're completely cracked. - Unknown
The abdomen, the chest, and the brain will forever be shut from the intrusion of the wise and humane surgeon. - Eric Ericksen
Most ballet teachers in the United States are terrible. If they were in medicine, everyone would be poisoned. - George Balanchine
My heart, which is so full to overflowing, has often been solaced and refreshed by music when sick and weary. - Martin Luther
What if the kid you bullied at school, grew up, and turned out to be the only surgeon who could save your life? - Lynette Mather
Recommending gastric bypass as a national solution for our diabetes epidemic is bad medicine and bad economics. - Mark Hyman
With some diseases, like type 2 diabetes, if people get alerted early, they can take steps to avert getting sick. - Elizabeth Holmes
There is no medicine like hope, no incentive so great, and no tonic so powerful as expectation of something tomorrow. - Orison Swett Marden
The doctor may also learn more about the illness from the way the patient tells the story than from the story itself. - James B. Herrick
Albert Schweitzer's philosophy is that a sick, miserable African of today can be a strong healthy cannibal tomorrow. - Joe E Lewis
My doctor recently told me that jogging could add years to my life. I think he was right. I feel ten years older already. - Milton Berle
My husband wanted one of those big-screen TVs for his birthday. So I just moved his chair closer to the one we have already. - Wendy Liebman
Trying to manage diabetes is hard because if you don't, there are consequences you'll have to deal with later in life. - Bryan Adams
It is reasonable to expect the doctor to recognize that science may not have all the answers to problems of health and healing. - Norman Cousins
Let no one suppose that the words doctor and patient can disguise from the parties the fact that they are employer and employee. - George Bernard Shaw
The art of healing comes from nature, not from the physician. Therefore the physician must start from nature, with an open mind. - Paracelsus
Lost wealth may be replaced by industry; lost knowledge by study; lost health by temperance or medicine; but lost time is gone forever. - Samuel Smiles
When you are called to a sick man, be sure you know what the matter is — if you do not know, nature can do a great deal better than you can guess. - Nicholas de Belleville
see also Birthday, Doctor & Marriage Sections
Bacon Birthday Cake
Big Birthday Surprise
Birthday Dog
Blonde’s Birthday Task
Cake Message
Centennial Puff
Cheap Birthday Card
Crowded Birthday Party
DJ Birthday
Doctor Types
Family Birthday Reminder
Hippy Birthday
Jurassic Judah
Perfect Birthday Excuse
Redneck Birthday Cake
Shark Week Birthday Cake
“Underneath That” Cake
Woodcutter Birthday Cake
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30-Jun-2022 |