The Perfect Dog

A hungry dog will eat dirty puddings. - Latin Proverb

Dogs that bark at a distance never bite. - Unknown

No, it's all in perfect working order. - Spike Milligan

You can't teach a young dog old tricks. - Warren Buffet

Get the hanging dog expression off your face. - Archie Bunker

Our dog died from licking our wedding picture. - Phyllis Diller

Dogs got personality. Personality goes a long way. - Quentin Tarantino

There is no perfect marriage, for there are no perfect men. - French Proverb

A hot dog at the ballpark is better than a steak at the Ritz. - Humphrey Bogart

I've been on so many blind dates, I should get a free dog. - Wendy Liebman

Whenever I climb I am followed by a dog called "Ego". - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

Perfect love means to love the one through whom one became unhappy. - Soren Kierkegaard

I have nothing against dogs. I just hate rugs that go squish-squish. - Phyllis Diller

I had rather hear my dog bark at a crow, than a man swear he loves me. - William Shakespeare

Anybody who doesn't know what soap tastes like never washed a dog. - Franklin P Jones

There's no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face. - Bernard Williams

To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs. - Aldous Huxley

There's no way to be a perfect mother and a million ways to be a good one. - Jill Churchill

I begin by taking. I shall find scholars later to demonstrate my perfect right. - Frederick the Great

He that will have a perfect brother must resign himself to remaining brotherless. - Italian proverb

Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow. - Jeff Valdez

Nostalgia is like a grammar lesson: you find the present tense, but the past perfect. - Owens L. Pomeroy

Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful. - Ann Landers

A perfect parent is a person with excellent child-rearing theories and no actual children. - Dave Barry

It's not the size of the dog in the fight - it's the size of the fight in the dog. - Mark Twain

If you don't want your dog to have bad breath, do what I do: pour a little Lavoris in the toilet. - Jay Leno

Asking a working writer what he thinks about critics is like asking a lamppost how it feels about dogs. - Christopher Hampton

If you would perfect your body, guard your mind.
If you would renew your body, beautify your mind. - James Allen

Obama and his attack dogs have nothing but hate and anger in their hearts and spew it whenever possible. - Donald Trump

It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass! - Rodney Dangerfield

There are two things in this world that don't last long: dogs chasing cars, and pros putting for pars. - Lee Travino

They've finally come up with the perfect office computer. If it makes a mistake, it blames another computer. - Milton Berle

Already, companies that speak in the language of the pitch, the dog-and-pony show, are no longer speaking to anyone. - Unknown

Imagine if you succeeded in making the world perfect for your children what a shock the rest of life would be for them. - Joyce Maynard

Being happy doesn't mean that everything is perfect. it means that you've decided to look beyond the imperfections. - Unknown

The perfect date for me would be staying at home, making a big picnic in bed, eating Wotsits and cookies while watching cable TV. - Kim Kardashian

It reminds me why I chose Dauntless in the first place: not because they are perfect, but because they are alive. Because they are free. - Veronica Roth

The great outdoors is a theme with me; a walking holiday in Scotland is perfect - Culloden and the forests of Aviemore are both favourites. - Erin O'Connor

My life is the land, the dogs, the car, the motorcycle, the pond, the canoe, going to pick up mail. It's just a rural retreat that I enjoy. - Burt Shavitz

Dogs display reluctance and wrath
If you try to give them a bath;
They bury bones in hideaways
And half the time they trot sideaways. - Ogden Nash