CEAD MILE FAILTE ROMHAT!

A Hundred Thousand Welcome To You!

Happy St. Patrick’s Day to all our Irish Friends!


The Fert
You have to know Robbie Burns poetry (Ode To A Mouse) to understand this one!

Oh what a sleekit horrible beastie
Lurks in yer belly efter the feastie
Just as ye sit doon among yer kin
There sterts to stir an enormous wind
The neeps and tatties and mushy peas
stert workin like a gentle breeze
but soon the puddin wi the sauncie face
will have ye blawin all ower the place
Nae matter whit the hell ye dae
a’bodys gonnae have tae pay
even if ye try to stifle
It’s like a bullet oot a rifle
Hawd yer bum tight tae the chair
tae try and stop the leakin air
shify yersel fae cheek tae cheek
Prae tae God it doesnae reek
But aw yer efforts go assunder
oot it comes like a clap a thunder
Ricochets aroon the room
michty me a sonic boom
God almighty it fairly reeks
Hope I huvnae shit ma breeks
tae the bog I better scurry
aw whit the hell, it’s no ma worry
A’body roon aboot me chokin
wan or two are nearly bokin
I’ll feel better for a while
Cannae help but raise a smile
Wis him! I shout with accusin glower
alas too late, he’s just keeled ower
Ye dirty bugger they shout and stare
A dinnae feel welcome any mair
Where e’re ye go let yer wind gan’ free
sounds like just the job fur me
whit a fuss at rabbie’s perty
ower the sake o’ won wee ferty

QuotaBills
I'm Irish. We think sideways. - Spike Milligan

Paddy O Furniture: Irish lawn chairs - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The gun is not out of Irish politics. - Ian Paisley

To marry the Irish is to look for poverty. - J.P. Donleavy

Being Irish, I always had this love of words. - Kenneth Branagh

I'm Irish. I think about death all the time. - Jack Nicholson

The Irish are a very popular race - with themselves. - Brendan Behan

Bless your little Irish heart and every other Irish part. - Irish Blessings

If it was raining soup, the Irish would go out with forks. - Brendan Behan

My Irish derivation has nothing to do with me. Why should it? - Carroll O'Connor

Irish Americans are no more Irish than Black Americans are Africans. - Bob Geldof

I had an Irish Catholic education. Horrible nuns, vindictive and cruel. - John Lydon

Yancy is actually a Native-American name, but I'm Irish. Go figure. - Yancy Butler

Other people have a nationality. The Irish and the Jews have a psychosis. - Brendan Behan

What's the use of being Irish if the world doesn't break your heart? - Unknown

Let everyone leave all the guns - British guns and Irish guns - outside the door. - Martin McGuinness

I'm not a walking extra in a Chekhov play; I'm no Slavic gloom or Irish gloom. - Orson Welles

There are only two kinds of people in the world: the Irish and those who wish they were. - Irish Saying

The Irish don't know what they want and are prepared to fight to the death to get it. - Sidney Littlewood

The Irish are the only men who know how to cry for the dirty polluted blood of all the world. - Norman Mailer

Jameson's Irish Whiskey really does improve with age: the older I get the more I like it. - Bob Monkhouse

Ireland is a small but insuppressible island half an hour nearer the sunset than Great Britain. - Thomas Kettle

I'm proud of my Irish heritage and culture and this show will feature a lot of Irish dancing. - Michael Flatley

I had to have some balls to be Irish Catholic in South London. Most of that time I spent fighting. - Pierce Brosnan

I think I'm going to keep my Irish accent forever now in any movie I make, because chicks dig it. - Chris O'Dowd

Being Irish, he had an abiding sense of tragedy, which sustained him through temporary periods of joy. - William Butler Yeats

The curse of the Irish is not that they don't know the words to a song - its that they know them all. - Susan Dooley

I was freelancing for years in Cork and around. I also wrote freelance pieces for 'The Irish Times.' - Kevin Barry

The Irish Catholic side was married to the life of an actor and I found out acting could be a form of prayer. - Liam Neeson

In 1953 there were two ways for an Irish Catholic boy to impress his parents: become a priest or attend Notre Dame. - Phil Donahue

If one could only teach the English how to talk, and the Irish how to listen, society here would be quite civilized. - Oscar Wilde

Ninety percent I'll spend on good times, women and Irish Whiskey. The other ten percent I'll probably waste. - Tug McGraw

May you always walk in sunshine. May you never want for more. May Irish angels rest their wings right beside your door. - Irish Blessings

We've never been cool, we're hot. Irish people are Italians who can't dress, Jamaicans who can't dance. - Bono

Irish poets, learn your trade, sing whatever is well made, scorn the sort now growing up all out of shape from toe to top. - William Butler Yeats

For my last meal, I'd want an Irish breakfast with soda bread and one of my dad's omelettes with three or four eggs. - Erin O'Connor

That's what the holidays are for - for one person to tell the stories and another to dispute them. Isn't that the Irish way? - Lara Flynn Boyle

I'm Irish, so I'm used to odd stews. I can take it. Just throw a lot of carrots and onions in there and I'll call it dinner. - Liam Neeson

Irish whiskey was first developed for its medicinal benefits. It's just lucky for the rest of us that the Irish are such a sickly bunch. - Unknown

Franklin D. Roosevelt: "Why do you Irish always answer a question with a question?",
New York Mayor Al Smith: "Do we now?" - Franklin D Roosevelt


see also   Irish  &  St. Patrick’s Day   Sections
Going Green for Ireland
Green Beards
Irish Alzheimers
Irish Bar
Irish Birth Control
Irish Blessings and Sayings
Irish Diplomacy
Irish Dock Overboard Oh-Nos
Irish Drink
Irish Exam
Irish Flood
Irish Rugby Fans
Irish Sky Garden Crater
Irish Sunblock
Irish Weather Forecasting
Irish Virgin
Irish Weather Forecasting
Irishman’s First Baseball Game
Little Leprechaun
St. Patrick’s Day Joe-ks
St. Patrick’s Day Riddles
St. Patrick’s Dog
Swimming Buddies
Teddy Bear Dance
What’s Under The Kilt?

 

Ostrich Bush

Frozen Fish Meal

Bacon Wrapped Onion Rings

T-Rex Shadow

Camel Parking

Cheat of the Year

Born To Be Wild

Why I Wear 2 Masks

Welfare State

Redneck Wedding Cake

Blonde Gears

Party Direction Sign

House 'Broke'rage

'Piece of Cake' Resignation Letter

Bee Safe
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25-Sep-2020