Q: What is out on the lawn all summer and is Irish?
A: Paddy ’O’Furniture.
Q: What do you call a fake stone in Ireland?
A: A sham rock.
Q: Why do frogs like St. Patrick’s Day?
A: Because they wear green.
Q: When is an Irish Potato not an Irish Potato?
A: When it’s a French fry.
Q: What does it mean when you find a lucky horseshoe?
A: Some unlucky horse is going barefoot.
Q: Why did the elephant wear green sneakers instead of red ones?
A: The red ones were in the wash.
Q: Why is an Irish river rich?
A: Because it has two banks.
Q: What does a leprechaun call a happy man wearing green?
A: A Jolly Green Giant.
Paddy O Furniture: Irish lawn chairs - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
The gun is not out of Irish politics. - Ian Paisley
I'm just a true Irish boy at heart. - Colin Farrell
Yes, I am an Irish lass through and through. - Erin Andrews
Being Irish, I always had this love of words. - Kenneth Branagh
The Danes and the Irish have a great simpatico. - Pierce Brosnan
I'm Irish. I think about death all the time. - Jack Nicholson
My dad's Irish music was such a huge influence. - Dido Armstrong
The Irish are a very popular race - with themselves. - Brendan Behan
I'm Irish and Cherokee Indian. I can't faint. - Lynn Collins
I have a thing for red-haired Irish boys, as we know. - Sandra Bullock
Yelling Irish, you can sound like an angry Leprechaun. - Norman Reedus
An Irishman's heart is nothing but his imagination. - George Bernard Shaw
The heart of an Irishman is nothing but his imagination. - George Bernard Shaw
The Irish seem to have more fire about them than the Scots. - Sean Connery
Ireland is a fruitful mother of genius, but a barren nurse. - Unknown
You think the Welsh are friendly, but the Irish are fabulous. - Bonnie Tyler
You know it's summer in Ireland when the rain gets warmer. - Hal Roach
I'm from durable stock. I'm made to work. I'm Irish. - Mary McCormack
Irish Alzheimer's - you forget everything except the grudges. - Unknown
We have always found the Irish a bit odd. They refuse to be English. - Winston Churchill
Irish Americans are no more Irish than Black Americans are Africans. - Bob Geldof
Yancy is actually a Native-American name, but I'm Irish. Go figure. - Yancy Butler
The Irish are a very fair people, they never speak well of one another. - Unknown
Being Irish is very much a part of who I am. I take it everywhere with me. - Colin Farrell
The Irish and British, they love satire, it's a large part of the culture. - Ben Nicholson
Under the English legal system you are innocent until you are shown to be Irish. - Ted Whitehead
Wherever you go and whatever you do, may the luck of the Irish be there with you. - Irish Blessings
The English should give Ireland home rule - and reserve the motion picture rights. - Will Rogers
I think of myself as being Jewish and Irish, despite the fact that I'm English. - Daniel Radcliffe
An Irishman can be worried by the consciousness that there is nothing to worry about. - Austin O'Malley
I'm not a walking extra in a Chekhov play; I'm no Slavic gloom or Irish gloom. - Orson Welles
I'm not Irish. Just because I have red hair doesn't mean I'm a lucky charm. - Rebecca Mader
I just wasn't cut out to be a Chinese Tiger Mom. I'm more of an Irish Setter Dad. - P.J. O'Rourke
I'm Irish. That means I'm Catholic. But, truth is, now I'm a retired Christian. - Peter O'Toole
The trouble with Ireland is that it's a country full of genius, with absolutely no talent. - Hugh Leonard
I think the genetics of being Irish are that you sort of prefer when it's rainy and cloudy. - Kate Flannery
I am the indoctrinated child of two lapsed Irish Catholics. Which is to say: I am not religious. - Meghan O'Rourke
I'm proud of my Irish heritage and culture and this show will feature a lot of Irish dancing. - Michael Flatley
Every St. Patrick's Day every Irishman goes out to find another Irishman to make a speech to. - Unknown
I grew up in an Irish Catholic family, and I think they force you to watch every James Cagney movie. - Jimmy Fallon
What a pity Hell's gates are not kept by O'Flynn
The surly old dog would let nobody in. - Patrick Ireland
I think I'm going to keep my Irish accent forever now in any movie I make, because chicks dig it. - Chris O'Dowd
I'm Irish on St. Patrick's Day. I'm Italian on Columbus Day. I'm a New Yorker every day. - Tamara Tunie
"Burn everything British," he once advised his Irish countrymen, "except their coal." - Jonathan Swift
The curse of the Irish is not that they don't know the words to a song - its that they know them all. - Susan Dooley
I think Paul McGuinness and U2 created the Irish music industry. It certainly wasn't there before that. - Van Morrison
I was freelancing for years in Cork and around. I also wrote freelance pieces for 'The Irish Times.' - Kevin Barry
The Irish Catholic side was married to the life of an actor and I found out acting could be a form of prayer. - Liam Neeson
In 1953 there were two ways for an Irish Catholic boy to impress his parents: become a priest or attend Notre Dame. - Phil Donahue
Ninety percent I'll spend on good times, women and Irish Whiskey. The other ten percent I'll probably waste. - Tug McGraw
We've never been cool, we're hot. Irish people are Italians who can't dress, Jamaicans who can't dance. - Bono
The great Gaels of Ireland are the men that God made mad.
For all their wars are merry, and all their songs are sad. - G K Chesterton
Isn't it a very curious thing that St. Patrick drove the snakes out of Ireland an' the English brought in the fleas. - Frank McCourt
I think being a woman is like being Irish. Everyone says you're important and nice, but you take second place all the same. - Iris Murdoch
With such riches as I have in life, you're always nervous. Being Irish, you're waiting for something to knock it sideways. - Pierce Brosnan
It is Ireland's sacred duty to send over, every few years, a playwright to save the English theatre from inarticulate glumness. - Kenneth Tynan
That's what the holidays are for - for one person to tell the stories and another to dispute them. Isn't that the Irish way? - Lara Flynn Boyle
Irish whiskey was first developed for its medicinal benefits. It's just lucky for the rest of us that the Irish are such a sickly bunch. - Unknown
Franklin D. Roosevelt: "Why do you Irish always answer a question with a question?",
New York Mayor Al Smith: "Do we now?" - Franklin D Roosevelt
Irish & St. Patrick’s Day
Going Green for Ireland
Habby Sin Pad-Riggs Dey!
Irish Blessings and Sayings
Irish Sky Garden Crater
Irish Weather Forecasting
St. Patrick’s Day Joe-ks
St. Patrick’s Dog
Teddy Bear Dance
What’s Under The Kilt?
Bear With Me
Open-air schools in The Netherlands
Redneck Porch Hunter
Elton or Eltoff?