Q: What is out on the lawn all summer and is Irish?
A: Paddy ’O’Furniture.
Q: What do you call a fake stone in Ireland?
A: A sham rock.
Q: Why do frogs like St. Patrick’s Day?
A: Because they wear green.
Q: When is an Irish Potato not an Irish Potato?
A: When it’s a French fry.
Q: What does it mean when you find a lucky horseshoe?
A: Some unlucky horse is going barefoot.
Q: Why did the elephant wear green sneakers instead of red ones?
A: The red ones were in the wash.
Q: Why is an Irish river rich?
A: Because it has two banks.
Q: What does a leprechaun call a happy man wearing green?
A: A Jolly Green Giant.
I'm Irish. We think sideways. - Spike Milligan
Paddy O Furniture: Irish lawn chairs - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
I'm just a true Irish boy at heart. - Colin Farrell
To marry the Irish is to look for poverty. - J.P. Donleavy
Yes, I am an Irish lass through and through. - Erin Andrews
Being Irish, I always had this love of words. - Kenneth Branagh
The Danes and the Irish have a great simpatico. - Pierce Brosnan
My dad's Irish music was such a huge influence. - Dido Armstrong
You never miss the water till the well has run dry. - Irish Proverb
I'm Irish and Cherokee Indian. I can't faint. - Lynn Collins
An Irishman's heart is nothing but his imagination. - George Bernard Shaw
The Irish ignore anything they can't drink or punch. - James Boswell
Where would the Irish be without someone to be Irish at? - Elizabeth Bowen
If it was raining soup, the Irish would go out with forks. - Brendan Behan
The Irish seem to have more fire about them than the Scots. - Sean Connery
Ireland is a fruitful mother of genius, but a barren nurse. - Unknown
I'm an Irish Catholic and I have a long iceberg of guilt. - Edna O'Brien
There is no language like the Irish for soothing and quieting. - John Millington Synge
I'm from durable stock. I'm made to work. I'm Irish. - Mary McCormack
Irish Alzheimer's - you forget everything except the grudges. - Unknown
The Irish are a fair people, they never speak well of one another. - Samuel Johnson
In Ireland, a writer is looked upon as a failed conversationalist. - Unknown
We have always found the Irish a bit odd. They refuse to be English. - Winston Churchill
Irish Americans are no more Irish than Black Americans are Africans. - Bob Geldof
Yancy is actually a Native-American name, but I'm Irish. Go figure. - Yancy Butler
Politics is the chloroform of the Irish people, or, rather the hashish. - Oliver St. John Gogarty
Like an Irishman's obligation, all on the one side, and always yours. - English saying
What's the use of being Irish if the world doesn't break your heart? - Unknown
Under the English legal system you are innocent until you are shown to be Irish. - Ted Whitehead
Wherever you go and whatever you do, may the luck of the Irish be there with you. - Irish Blessings
The English should give Ireland home rule - and reserve the motion picture rights. - Will Rogers
I think of myself as being Jewish and Irish, despite the fact that I'm English. - Daniel Radcliffe
My mother is Irish, my father is black and Venezuelan, and me - I'm tan, I guess. - Mariah Carey
I'm not Irish. Just because I have red hair doesn't mean I'm a lucky charm. - Rebecca Mader
I am who I am: an Irish Catholic kid, working class from Long Island. And I made it big. - Bill O'Reilly
The Irish don't know what they want and are prepared to fight to the death to get it. - Sidney Littlewood
I'm Irish. That means I'm Catholic. But, truth is, now I'm a retired Christian. - Peter O'Toole
Irish boomerang: It doesn't come back, it just sings sad songs about how much it wants to. - Unknown
I have a difficult time doing an Irish accent; even now, it kind of fades slowly into Scottish. - Robin Williams
I think the genetics of being Irish are that you sort of prefer when it's rainy and cloudy. - Kate Flannery
I'm proud of my Irish heritage and culture and this show will feature a lot of Irish dancing. - Michael Flatley
Every St. Patrick's Day every Irishman goes out to find another Irishman to make a speech to. - Unknown
I had to have some balls to be Irish Catholic in South London. Most of that time I spent fighting. - Pierce Brosnan
The Irish gave the bagpipes to the Scotts as a joke, but the Scotts haven't seen the joke yet. - Oliver Herford
The problem with being Irish is having 'Riverdance' on your back. It's a burden at times. - Roddy Doyle
I'm Irish on St. Patrick's Day. I'm Italian on Columbus Day. I'm a New Yorker every day. - Tamara Tunie
I have drawn inspiration from the Marine Corps, the Jewish struggle in Palestine and Israel, and the Irish. - Leon Uris
I think Paul McGuinness and U2 created the Irish music industry. It certainly wasn't there before that. - Van Morrison
I was freelancing for years in Cork and around. I also wrote freelance pieces for 'The Irish Times.' - Kevin Barry
I'm a big fan of the Irish accent. After a couple of drinks, I start to get a bit of an Irish lilt, too. - Emily Ratajkowski
An Irishman is never drunk as long as he can hold onto one blade of grass to keep from falling off the earth. - Unknown
As I told Piers Morgan, 'Catholics have confession, whereas Northern Irish Protestants only have interviews.' - James Nesbitt
May you always walk in sunshine. May you never want for more. May Irish angels rest their wings right beside your door. - Irish Blessings
Irish poets, learn your trade, sing whatever is well made, scorn the sort now growing up all out of shape from toe to top. - William Butler Yeats
Isn't it a very curious thing that St. Patrick drove the snakes out of Ireland an' the English brought in the fleas. - Frank McCourt
It's not that the Irish are cynical. It's rather that they have a wonderful lack of respect for everything and everybody. - Brendan Behan
With such riches as I have in life, you're always nervous. Being Irish, you're waiting for something to knock it sideways. - Pierce Brosnan
That's what the holidays are for - for one person to tell the stories and another to dispute them. Isn't that the Irish way? - Lara Flynn Boyle
Our ancestors believed in magic, prayers, trickery, browbeating and bullying. I think it would be fair to sum that up as 'Irish politics'. - Flann O'Brien
Franklin D. Roosevelt: "Why do you Irish always answer a question with a question?",
New York Mayor Al Smith: "Do we now?" - Franklin D Roosevelt
Irish & St. Patrick’s Day
Going Green for Ireland
Habby Sin Pad-Riggs Dey!
Irish Blessings and Sayings
Irish Sky Garden Crater
Irish Weather Forecasting
St. Patrick’s Day Joe-ks
St. Patrick’s Dog
Teddy Bear Dance
What’s Under The Kilt?
Redneck Tree Fort
Hot Job in the City
Peter Cotton Ale
Grandma Needs Help
Early Spring Planting Yields Extra Returns
Needle's Eye Bike
Drink And Drive Directions
Texas Roller Blades
Frog Spout Security