Never Underestimate The Power of Seniors

If you’re going to have a Senior Moment, make it memorable


[This is a true account as recorded in the Police Log of Sarasota, Florida…]

An elderly Florida lady did her shopping and, upon returning to her car, found four males in the act of leaving with her vehicle. She dropped her shopping bags and drew her handgun, proceeding to scream at the top of her voice: “I have a gun, and I know how to use it.  Get out of the car!”

The four men didn’t wait for a second invitation. They got out and ran like mad. The lady, somewhat shaken, then proceeded to load her shopping bags into the back of the car and got into the driver’s seat. She was so shaken that she could not get her key into the ignition. She tried and tried, and then it dawned on her why - for the same reason she did not understand why there was a football, a frisbee and two 12 packs in the front seat... A few minutes later, she found her own car parked four or five spaces farther down.

She loaded her bags into the car and drove to the police station to report her mistake. The sergeant to whom she told the story couldn’t stop laughing. He pointed to the other end of the counter, where four pale men were reporting a car jacking by a mad, elderly woman described as white, less than five feet tall, glasses, curly white hair, and carrying a large handgun. No charges were filed.




QuotaBills
Old age comes at a bad time. - Sue Banducci

Old age is life's parody. - Simone de Beauvoir

Old age is the verdict of life. - Amelia E Barr

Cherish youth, but trust old age. - Pueblo Proverb

Police do not belong in war zones. - Daniel K Moran

I want to die young at a ripe old age. - Ashley Montagu

Old age is always 15 years older than I am. - Bernard Baruch

Fourty is the old age of youth; 50 is the youth of old age. - Victor Hugo

Memorial services are the cocktail parties of the geriatric set. - Ralph Richardson

Never have I enjoyed youth so thoroughly as I have in my old age. - George Santayana

Reality: The leading cause of stress among those in touch with it. - Lily Tomlin

Old age means realizing you will never own all the dogs you wanted to. - Joe Gores

Stress is an ignorant state. It believes that everything is an emergency. - Natalie Goldberg

A diamond is just a piece of coal that handles stress exceptionally well. - Unknown

The police are not here to create disorder, they;re here to preserve disorder. - Richard J Daley

The police force cannot be completely independent of the executive government. - P Chidambaram

How incessant and great are the ills with which a prolonged old age is replete. - C S Lewis

If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent? - George Carlin

Most stress is caused by people who overestimate the importance of their problems. - Michael LeBoeuf

Police: The only people who are paid to go around pinching people in the wrong places - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

More people would live to a ripe old age if they weren't too busy providing for it. - Unknown

Man should not try to avoid stress any more than he would shun food, love, or exercise. - Hans Selye

There is no pleasure worth forgoing just for an extra three years in the geriatric ward. - John Mortimer

My comfort is, that old age, that ill layer-up of beauty, can do no more spoil upon my face. - William Shakespeare

There's only two people in your life you should lie to... the police and your girlfriend. - Jack Nicholson

Old age has its pleasures, which, though different, are not less than the pleasures of youth. - W Somerset Maugham

The toilets at a local police station have been stolen. Police say they have nothing to go on. - Ronnie Corbett

In times of great stress or adversity, plow your anger and your energy into something positive. - Lee Iacocca

In youth the days are short and the years are long; in old age the years are short and the days are long. - Nikita I Panin

Old age is like a plane flying through a storm. Once you are aboard, there is nothing you can do about it. - Golda Meir

Old age is an excellent time for outrage. My goal is to say or do at least one outrageous thing every week. - Maggie Kuhn

Autumn is really the best of the seasons; and I'm not sure that old age isn't the best part of life. - C S Lewis

Old age is when you resent the swimsuit issue of Sports Illustrated because there are fewer articles to read. - George Burns

I'm grateful that I never was that senior athlete who realized she'd done nothing but train all her life. - Clara Hughes

I think our police are excellent, probably because I have not done anything that has occasioned being beaten up by these good men. - Clement Freud

Keep your sense of humor. There's enough stress in the rest of your life to let bad shots ruin a game you're supposed to enjoy. - Amy Alcott

Not one of them who took up in his youth with his opinion that there are no gods ever continued until old age faithful to his conviction. - Plato

Old age has a great sense of calm and freedom. When the passions have relaxed their hold you have escaped, not from one master, but from many. - Plato

To be a champion, you have to learn to handle stress and pressure. But if you've prepared mentally and physically, you don't have to worry. - Harvey Mackay

When you have police officers who abuse citizens, you erode public confidence in law enforcement. That makes the job of good police officers unsafe. - Mary F Berry


see also   Aging  &  Police  Sections
Aging Cyclist
Aging Mermaid
Bird Walker
Boy Scout Scooter
Camel Walkers
Cold One
Dance While You Can
Dear Crossing
Elderly Rocker
Florida’s Retired Bikers
Grandma’s Controller
Harley Half Ton
iPhone Dock
It’s Never Too Late, Harley
Jogging Bike
Just Like Grandpa
Newfie Senior Scooter
Once A Kid, Always A Kid
Onward, My Noble Steed!
Racing Grandpa
Scooter Down
Scooter Duo
Scooter Races
Seatbelt Extender
Senior’s Paddle Surfboard
Snow Tires for Seniors
Treadmill Workout
Walker Buddies

 

Gold Bar Carrot Cake

Looking For A Mate

Food For Thought

Kanye Twitty

Skull Tentacles

Ukrainian Cattle Car

CreepEye

Canadian Whiskey

Winter Tree

WrenchWare

Dog Sled

Winter Ready

Bread Dress

Bear With Me

Open-air schools in The Netherlands

Ghost Food

Toothpaste Holder

Two Face

Redneck Porch Hunter

Jeep Words
Full list of creditsFacebookTwitterDiggStumbleUponDelicious

23-Oct-2021