Never Underestimate The Power of Seniors

If you’re going to have a Senior Moment, make it memorable


[This is a true account as recorded in the Police Log of Sarasota, Florida…]

An elderly Florida lady did her shopping and, upon returning to her car, found four males in the act of leaving with her vehicle. She dropped her shopping bags and drew her handgun, proceeding to scream at the top of her voice: “I have a gun, and I know how to use it.  Get out of the car!”

The four men didn’t wait for a second invitation. They got out and ran like mad. The lady, somewhat shaken, then proceeded to load her shopping bags into the back of the car and got into the driver’s seat. She was so shaken that she could not get her key into the ignition. She tried and tried, and then it dawned on her why - for the same reason she did not understand why there was a football, a frisbee and two 12 packs in the front seat... A few minutes later, she found her own car parked four or five spaces farther down.

She loaded her bags into the car and drove to the police station to report her mistake. The sergeant to whom she told the story couldn’t stop laughing. He pointed to the other end of the counter, where four pale men were reporting a car jacking by a mad, elderly woman described as white, less than five feet tall, glasses, curly white hair, and carrying a large handgun. No charges were filed.




QuotaBills
Old age is the verdict of life. - Amelia E Barr

I'm not aging, I'm marinating. - Unknown

Aging wrinkles the body. Quitting wrinkles the soul. - Douglas MacArthur

Old age is when the liver spots show through your gloves. - Phyllis Diller

Aging seems to be the only available way to live a long life. - Daniel F E Auber

The old age of an eagle is better than the youth of a sparrow. - Proverb

Police Station: A place where sleeping is all right in a pinch - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Never have I enjoyed youth so thoroughly as I have in my old age. - George Santayana

Old age is the most unexpected of all things that happen to a man. - Leon Trotsky

I don't own a camera, so I travel with a police sketch artist. - George Carlin

Cherish all your happy moments: they make a fine cushion for old age. - Christopher Morley

Old age means realizing you will never own all the dogs you wanted to. - Joe Gores

In youth we run into difficulties; in old age difficulties run into us. - Josh Billings

When a police officer tells you to stay in the car, you stay in the car. - Reese Witherspoon

Stress is nothing more than a socially acceptable form of mental illness. - Richard Carlson

God will never give you anything you can't handle, so don't stress. - Kelly Clarkson

I will never be an old man. To me, old age is always 15 years older than I am. - Francis Bacon

Adopting the right attitude can convert a negative stress into a positive one. - Hans Selye

The police are not here to create disorder, they;re here to preserve disorder. - Richard J Daley

The police force cannot be completely independent of the executive government. - P Chidambaram

Youth is the time of getting, middle age of improving, and old age of spending. - Anne Bradstreet

How incessant and great are the ills with which a prolonged old age is replete. - C S Lewis

Stress depletes willpower, which diminishes your ability to control those emotions. - Roy F Baumeister

The greatest weapon against stress is our ability to choose one thought over another. - William James

Children are a great comfort in your old age, and they help you reach it faster, too. - Lionel Kauffman

Stress is your body's way of saying you haven't worked enough unpaid overtime. - Scott Adams

Man should not try to avoid stress any more than he would shun food, love, or exercise. - Hans Selye

Aging is the extraordinary process where you become the person you always should have been. - David Bowie

The police feel that most of the public are against them and that there is a lot of bad feeling. - Peter James

In youth the days are short and the years are long; in old age the years are short and the days are long. - Nikita I Panin

To keep the heart unwrinkled, to be hopeful, kindly, cheerful, reverent - that is to triumph over old age. - Thomas Bailey Aldrich

I'm learning in my old age that the only thing you can do to keep your sanity is to stay in the moment. - Willem Dafoe

I'm grateful that I never was that senior athlete who realized she'd done nothing but train all her life. - Clara Hughes

Lord save us all from old age and broken health and a hope tree that has lost the faculty of putting out blossoms. - Mark Twain

May you keep dreaming until the day you die. May imagination overtake memory. May you die young at a ripe old age. - Mark Batterson

Transformation also means looking for ways to stop pushing yourself so hard professionally or inviting so much stress. - Gail Sheehy

I'm being kidnapped by a comforter, sheet and pillow. No need to call the police for I will be released by morning. - Unknown

Animals are not our selfie props. If there's any risk that your photo is going to hurt or stress an animal, it's not worth it. - Angela Henderson

Old age has a great sense of calm and freedom. When the passions have relaxed their hold you have escaped, not from one master, but from many. - Plato

To be a champion, you have to learn to handle stress and pressure. But if you've prepared mentally and physically, you don't have to worry. - Harvey Mackay


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27-Jan-2021