Little Johnny’s Worm Experiment

Ask Johnny where the experiment went wrong


Little Johnny watched the science teacher start an experiment with worms.

Four worms were placed into four separate jars:
The first worm was put into a jar of alcohol.
The second worm was put into a jar of cigarette smoke.
The third worm was put into a jar of sperm.
The fourth worm was put into a jar of soil.

After one day, these were the results:
The first worm in alcohol - dead.
Second worm in cigarette smoke - dead.
Third worm in sperm - dead.
Fourth worm in soil - alive.

So the Science teacher asked the class, “What can you learn from this experiment?”

Little Johnny quickly raised his hand and said, “As long as you drink, smoke and have sex, you won’t have worms.”




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Learn what you are and be such. - Pindar

Science is organized knowledge. - Herbert Spencer

I never lose. I win or I learn. - Nelson Mandela

A man must learn to forgive himself. - Arthur Davis Ficke

Science is forever rewriting itself. - Unknown

Failure is success if we learn from it. - Malcolm Forbes

Once you learn to quit, it becomes a habit. - Vince Lombardi

HOMEWORK: Half Of My Energy Wasted On Random Knowledge - Unknown

You can learn a line from a win and a book from a defeat. - Paul Brown

A science which hesitates to forget its founders is lost. - Alfred North Whitehead

I have never let my schooling interfere with my education. - Mark Twain

Dilemma of a student: Should I finish my homework or sleep? - Unknown

The only real mistake is the one from which we learn nothing. - John Powell

Native ability without education is like a tree without fruit. - Aristippus

Learning to ignore things is one of the great paths to inner peace. - Robert J Sawyer

Education is what survives when what has been learnt has been forgotten. - B.F. Skinner

Money can't buy you friends, but you can get a better class of enemy. - Spike Milligan

We're all learning here; the best listeners will end up the smartest. - Charlene Li

Kids: they dance before they learn there is anything that isn't music. - William Stafford

The road to learning by precept is long, but by example short and effective. - Seneca

Life is like playing violin in public and learning the instrument as one goes on. - Samuel Butler

To learn who rules over you, simply find out who you are not allowed to criticize. - Voltaire

No dignity, no learning, no force of character, can make any stand against good wit. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

I am who I am: an Irish Catholic kid, working class from Long Island. And I made it big. - Bill O'Reilly

There's a big overlap with the people you meet at the fantasy and science fiction cons. - Fred Saberhagen

If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, you are a leader. - John Quincy Adams

The Romans would never have found time to conquer the world if they had been obliged to learn Latin. - Heinrich Heine

You learn how to be book smart in school, but you better not forget that you also need to be street smart. - Harvey Mackay

The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious. It is the source of all true art and science. - Albert Einstein

In the sick room, ten cents' worth of human understanding equals ten dollars' worth of medical science. - Martin H. Fischer

Let early education be a sort of amusement; you will then better be able to find out the natural bent of the child. - Plato

The doctor may also learn more about the illness from the way the patient tells the story than from the story itself. - James B. Herrick

The chief reason for going to school is to get the impression fixed for life that there is a book side for everything. - Robert Frost

You can only learn from the second-raters. The first-raters are out of range; you can't see how they get their effects. - Unknown

I wanted to be scared again. I wanted to feel unsure again. That's the only way I learn, the only way I feel challenged. - Connie Chung

NASA scientists have been studying giraffe skin so they can apply what they learn from it to the construction of spacesuits. - Joanna Lumley

Real education should educate us out of self into something far finer; into a selflessness which links us with all humanity. - Lady Nancy Astor

When any young student asks me, "Do you think I should be a dancer?" I always say, "If you have to ask, then the answer is no." - Martha Graham

I was thrown out of college during my freshman year, for cheating on my metaphysics final - I looked within the soul of the boy sitting next to me. - Woody Allen

Success is no accident. It is hard work, perseverance, learning, studying, sacrifice and most of all, love of what you are doing or learning to do. - Pele


see also   School  Section
Additions to the Periodic Table of Elements
Atom Trust
Children’s Science Exam Answers
Chimera Genetics
Comprehending Engineers
Einstein Seeds
Engine-eering
Famous Equations
Genetic Science
Hazardous Materials Data Sheet for Woman
Law of Emotion
Nitrate
Periodic Table Shower
Professor Kisses
Redneck Engineering Exam
Science Fiction Recipes
Science World
Scientific Hunting
Singapore SkyPark
The Ig Nobel Awards
Who Needs Physics?
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04-Apr-2020