Little Johnny’s Worm Experiment

Ask Johnny where the experiment went wrong


Little Johnny watched the science teacher start an experiment with worms.

Four worms were placed into four separate jars:
The first worm was put into a jar of alcohol.
The second worm was put into a jar of cigarette smoke.
The third worm was put into a jar of sperm.
The fourth worm was put into a jar of soil.

After one day, these were the results:
The first worm in alcohol - dead.
Second worm in cigarette smoke - dead.
Third worm in sperm - dead.
Fourth worm in soil - alive.

So the Science teacher asked the class, “What can you learn from this experiment?”

Little Johnny quickly raised his hand and said, “As long as you drink, smoke and have sex, you won’t have worms.”




QuotaBills
Science is organized knowledge. - Herbert Spencer

Every runner is an experiment of one. - George Sheehan

College is a refuge from hasty judgment. - Robert Frost

Science is the record of dead religions. - Oscar Wilde

Once you learn to quit, it becomes a habit. - Vince Lombardi

Learn to hold loosely all that is not eternal. - A. Maude Royden

You live and learn, then die and forget it all. - Noel Coward

Play is our brain's favorite way of learning. - Diane Ackerman

There is little you can learn from doing nothing. - Zig Ziglar

Rotarians, be patriotic! Learn to shoot yourself. - Unknown

We are all worms, but I do believe I am a glow-worm. - Winston Churchill

The whole purpose of education is to turn mirrors into windows. - Sydney J. Harris

I realized my mission in life was to learn more, not earn more. - Surya Das

Learning to live in the present moment is part of the path of joy. - Sarah Ban Breathnach

Science without religion is lame, religion without science is blind. - Albert Einstein

Even when I have absolutely nothing to do, homework is not an option. - Unknown

The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese. - Steven Wright

Do not be embarrassed by your failures, learn from them and start again. - Richard Branson

Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever. - Mahatma Gandhi

Being a writer is like having homework every night for the rest of your life. - Lawrence Kasdan

An inventor is simply a fellow who doesn't take his education too seriously. - Charles F. Kettering

I am convinced that the best learning takes place when the learner takes charge. - Seymour Papert

We can learn much from wise words, little from wisecracks, and less from wise guys. - William Arthur Ward

The most important thing in life is to learn how to give out love, and let it come in. - Morrie Schwartz

The more you learn about the dignity of the gorilla, the more you want to avoid people. - Dian Fossey

Life is like playing a violin solo in public and learning the instrument as one goes on. - Samuel Butler

Be open to learning new lessons even if they contradict the lessons you learned yesterday. - Ellen Degeners

Mathematics is the cheapest science. All one needs for mathematics is a pencil and a paper. - George Polya

Man is certainly stark mad. He cannot make a worm, and yet he will be making gods by dozens. - Montaigne

The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open. - Groucho Marx

The more that you read, the more things you will know. The more you learn, the more places you'll go. - Dr. Seuss

I've come to learn that the best time to debate family members is when they have good in their mouths. - Kenneth Cole

I think we consider too much the good luck of the early bird and not enough the bad luck of the early worm. - Franklin D Roosevelt

Science has not yet mastered prophecy. We predict too much for the next year and yet far too little for the next ten. - Neil A Armstrong

I wanted to be scared again. I wanted to feel unsure again. That's the only way I learn, the only way I feel challenged. - Connie Chung

If I had thought about it, I wouldn't have done the experiment. The literature was full of examples that said you can't do this. - Spencer Silver

Religion is something left over from the infancy of our intelligence, it will fade away as we adopt reason and science as our guidelines. - Bertrand Russell

Oil prices have fallen lately. We include this news for the benefit of gas stations, which otherwise wouldn't learn of it for six months. - Bill Tammeus

In learning to know other things, and other minds, we become more intimately acquainted with ourselves, and are to ourselves better worth knowing. - Philip Gilbert Hamilton

Do not train boys to learning by force and harshness, but lead them by what amuses them, so that they may better discover the bent of their minds. - Plato


see also   School  Section
Additions to the Periodic Table of Elements
Atom Trust
Children’s Science Exam Answers
Chimera Genetics
Comprehending Engineers
Einstein Seeds
Engine-eering
Famous Equations
Genetic Science
Hazardous Materials Data Sheet for Woman
Law of Emotion
Nitrate
Periodic Table Shower
Professor Kisses
Redneck Engineering Exam
Science Fiction Recipes
Science World
Scientific Hunting
Singapore SkyPark
The Ig Nobel Awards
Who Needs Physics?
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22-Feb-2020