My uncle John was in the fertilized egg business when I was young. He had several hundred young layers, called pullets, and 8 or 10 roosters whose job was to fertilize the eggs. My uncle kept records and any rooster or pullet that didn’t perform well went into the pot and was replaced.
Now this took an awful lot of time. So my uncle got a set of tiny bells and attached them to his roosters. Now he could sit on the porch and fill out an efficiency report by listening to the bells. My uncle’s favorite rooster was old Brewster. A very fine specimen he was, but his bell had not rung all morning. Uncle John went to investigate. Several roosters were chasing pullets, bells a-ringing, but Brewster had his bell in his beak so it couldn’t ring. He’d sneak up on a pullet, do his job and walk on to the next one.
Uncle was so proud of Brewster he entered him in the county fair. Brewster was an overnight sensation. The judges not only awarded him the No Bell Prize, but also the Pullet Surprise.
Organic Farm: Tilling like it is - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Himalaya: A rooster that lays an egg - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Friccastewing a chicken on the hotplate - Archie Bunker
I'm too drunk to taste this chicken. - Colonel Sanders
The thicker the hay, the easier it is mowed. - Alaric the Goth
Life is simpler when you plow around the stump. - Unknown
The only thing chicken about Israel is their soup. - Bob Hope
There's going to be a real ding-dong when the bell goes. - David Coleman
Eating and reading are two pleasures that combine admirably. - C S Lewis
Corn can't expect justice from a court composed of chickens. - African Proverb
Farmers: Men successful only if they sell their farms to golf clubs - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Gentleman Farmer: One who has more hay in the bank thank in the barn - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
The best comfort food will always be greens, cornbread, and fried chicken. - Maya Angelou
We seem to want one vehicle to carry people and soccer balls and hay bales. - Franz von Holzhausen
A good farmer is nothing more nor less than a handyman with a sense of humus. - E.B. White
I used to practice my speeches on my tractor while I plowed my daddy's field. - Jim Hunt
Anytime you suffer a setback or disappointment, put your head down and plow ahead. - Les Brown
Ask not for whom the bell tolls, and you will pay only the station-to-station rate. - Unknown
Abundance: 1. Big party held in a bakery; 2. A social event held in a farm building. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
That's the great thing about a tractor. You can't really hear the phone ring. - Jeff Foxworthy
Put one foot in front of the other and keep going. Put blinders on and plow right ahead. - George Lucas
If you were plowing a field, which would you rather use? Two strong oxen or 1024 chickens? - Seymour Cray
Genetic Engineering: A recent attempt to formalize what farmers have been doing all along. - Unknown
I unfortunately still crave chicken McNuggets and bacon, which is the meat candy of the world. - Katy Perry
Of all sound of all bells... most solemn and touching is the peal which rings out the Old Year. - Charles Lamb
The key to everything is patience. You get the chicken by hatching the egg, not by smashing it. - Ellen Glasgow
My brother thinks he's a chicken.
We don't talk him out of it because we need the eggs. - Groucho Marx
It is only the farmer who faithfully plants seeds in the Spring, who reaps a harvest in the Autumn. - B C Forbes
True love comes quietly, without banners or flashing lights. If you hear bells, get your ears checked. - Erich Segal
I'm going to the Colonel next. I'm gonna get a big bucket of chicken chests and smashed potatoes. - Archie Bunker
Farming looks mighty easy when your plow is a pencil and you're a thousand miles from the corn field. - Dwight D Eisenhower
The attempt to combine wisdom and power has only rarely been successful, and then only for a short while. - Albert Einstein
I dream of a better tomorrow, where chickens can cross the road and not be questioned about their motives. - Ralph Waldo Emerson
I'm a farm boy. If we need five people to haul in hay, we don't take one and just work them to death. - Lincoln Davis
Bruce Lee's fast pace, Jet Li's pretty style and Jet Li's acrobatics combine with Muay Thai for my own style. - Tony Jaa
When bad men combine, the good must associate; else they will fall one by one, an unpitied sacrifice in a contemptible struggle. - Edmund Burke
A rooster crows only when it sees the light. Put him in the dark and he'll never crow. I have seen the light and I'm crowing. - Muhammad Ali
I dream of the realization of the unity of Africa, whereby its leaders combine in their efforts to solve the problems of this continent. - Nelson Mandela
Music embodies feeling without forcing it to contend and combine with thought, as it is forced in most arts and especially in the art of words. - Franz Liszt
Lincolnshire is the Idaho of England. You were either going to drive a tractor for the rest of your life or head for the city to work in a factory. - Bernie Taupin
Himalaya: A rooster that lays an egg - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Friccastewing a chicken on the hotplate - Archie Bunker
I'm too drunk to taste this chicken. - Colonel Sanders
The thicker the hay, the easier it is mowed. - Alaric the Goth
Life is simpler when you plow around the stump. - Unknown
The only thing chicken about Israel is their soup. - Bob Hope
There's going to be a real ding-dong when the bell goes. - David Coleman
Eating and reading are two pleasures that combine admirably. - C S Lewis
Corn can't expect justice from a court composed of chickens. - African Proverb
Farmers: Men successful only if they sell their farms to golf clubs - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Gentleman Farmer: One who has more hay in the bank thank in the barn - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
The best comfort food will always be greens, cornbread, and fried chicken. - Maya Angelou
We seem to want one vehicle to carry people and soccer balls and hay bales. - Franz von Holzhausen
A good farmer is nothing more nor less than a handyman with a sense of humus. - E.B. White
I used to practice my speeches on my tractor while I plowed my daddy's field. - Jim Hunt
Anytime you suffer a setback or disappointment, put your head down and plow ahead. - Les Brown
Ask not for whom the bell tolls, and you will pay only the station-to-station rate. - Unknown
Abundance: 1. Big party held in a bakery; 2. A social event held in a farm building. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
That's the great thing about a tractor. You can't really hear the phone ring. - Jeff Foxworthy
Put one foot in front of the other and keep going. Put blinders on and plow right ahead. - George Lucas
If you were plowing a field, which would you rather use? Two strong oxen or 1024 chickens? - Seymour Cray
Genetic Engineering: A recent attempt to formalize what farmers have been doing all along. - Unknown
I unfortunately still crave chicken McNuggets and bacon, which is the meat candy of the world. - Katy Perry
Of all sound of all bells... most solemn and touching is the peal which rings out the Old Year. - Charles Lamb
The key to everything is patience. You get the chicken by hatching the egg, not by smashing it. - Ellen Glasgow
My brother thinks he's a chicken.
We don't talk him out of it because we need the eggs. - Groucho Marx
It is only the farmer who faithfully plants seeds in the Spring, who reaps a harvest in the Autumn. - B C Forbes
True love comes quietly, without banners or flashing lights. If you hear bells, get your ears checked. - Erich Segal
I'm going to the Colonel next. I'm gonna get a big bucket of chicken chests and smashed potatoes. - Archie Bunker
Farming looks mighty easy when your plow is a pencil and you're a thousand miles from the corn field. - Dwight D Eisenhower
The attempt to combine wisdom and power has only rarely been successful, and then only for a short while. - Albert Einstein
I dream of a better tomorrow, where chickens can cross the road and not be questioned about their motives. - Ralph Waldo Emerson
I'm a farm boy. If we need five people to haul in hay, we don't take one and just work them to death. - Lincoln Davis
Bruce Lee's fast pace, Jet Li's pretty style and Jet Li's acrobatics combine with Muay Thai for my own style. - Tony Jaa
When bad men combine, the good must associate; else they will fall one by one, an unpitied sacrifice in a contemptible struggle. - Edmund Burke
A rooster crows only when it sees the light. Put him in the dark and he'll never crow. I have seen the light and I'm crowing. - Muhammad Ali
I dream of the realization of the unity of Africa, whereby its leaders combine in their efforts to solve the problems of this continent. - Nelson Mandela
Music embodies feeling without forcing it to contend and combine with thought, as it is forced in most arts and especially in the art of words. - Franz Liszt
Lincolnshire is the Idaho of England. You were either going to drive a tractor for the rest of your life or head for the city to work in a factory. - Bernie Taupin
see also Farm Section
Cat Nap
Chick Incubator
Family Reunion
Flamingo Imposter
Hen Pecked
Mom Lookout
Once Is Never Enough
Rooster Retirement
Super Hen
 Tree Sorrow |  OCD Electrician |  2021 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars |  Redneck Shower Head |  Wise Moves |
 Fox Hunting Madness |  Emperor Penguins |  The Side Effects of Veganism |  Stair Railing Electrician |  Cold Faucet |
 Make Womb For Baby |  Hardtail Bike |  Birth Control Kit |  Come-Back Line Of The Year |  Duck Gears |
 Chewing Gum Hazard |  Keyboard Seating |  Bent Over |  Whatchamacallit Car |  Gone To Market |
28-Jan-2021 |