My uncle John was in the fertilized egg business when I was young. He had several hundred young layers, called pullets, and 8 or 10 roosters whose job was to fertilize the eggs. My uncle kept records and any rooster or pullet that didn’t perform well went into the pot and was replaced.
Now this took an awful lot of time. So my uncle got a set of tiny bells and attached them to his roosters. Now he could sit on the porch and fill out an efficiency report by listening to the bells. My uncle’s favorite rooster was old Brewster. A very fine specimen he was, but his bell had not rung all morning. Uncle John went to investigate. Several roosters were chasing pullets, bells a-ringing, but Brewster had his bell in his beak so it couldn’t ring. He’d sneak up on a pullet, do his job and walk on to the next one.
Uncle was so proud of Brewster he entered him in the county fair. Brewster was an overnight sensation. The judges not only awarded him the No Bell Prize, but also the Pullet Surprise.
The name Pavlov rings a bell. - Unknown
Farming is a profession of hope. - Brian Brett
Farmers are the salt of the earth. - Unknown
Let's make hay while it lasts. - James Lovelock
Himalaya: A rooster that lays an egg - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Maybe I should just go home and ride my tractor. - Chuck Grassley
Do not count your chickens before they are hatched. - Aesop
If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages? - George Carlin
I had rather be on my farm than be emperor of the world. - George Washington
Farm: What a city man dreams of at 5 P.M., never at 5 A.M. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
There's going to be a real ding-dong when the bell goes. - David Coleman
A bumble bee is considerably faster than a John Deere tractor. - Unknown
Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you didn't cook it! - Gordon Ramsay
Gentleman Farmer: One who has more hay in the bank thank in the barn - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Work and pray, live on hay, you'll get pie in the sky when you die. - Joe Hill
A good farmer is nothing more nor less than a handyman with a sense of humus. - E.B. White
I have yet to hear a man ask for advice on how to combine marriage and a career. - Gloria Steinem
We need more young people involved in farming because the future needs real food. - Helena Sylvester
I am obsessed with Costco. I love the salmon and rotisserie chicken, the dog beds. - Kris Jenner
Farmers don't just work til the sun goes down; they work til the job gets done. - Unknown
My mother is no spring chicken although she has got as many chemicals in her as one. - Edna Everage
Abundance: 1. Big party held in a bakery; 2. A social event held in a farm building. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Is this chicken or is this fish? I know it's tuna but it says chicken of the sea. - Jessica Simpson
Underachiever: An employee who has squatters right on the far left side of the bell curve - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Of all sound of all bells... most solemn and touching is the peal which rings out the Old Year. - Charles Lamb
Cajun is country food by farmers and fisherman that arrived in Louisiana from Acadiana, Canada. - Paul Prudhomme
The key to everything is patience. You get the chicken by hatching the egg, not by smashing it. - Ellen Glasgow
Life on a farm is a school of patience. You can't hurry the crops or make an ox in two days. - Haneri Liogier
My brother thinks he's a chicken.
We don't talk him out of it because we need the eggs. - Groucho Marx
It is only the farmer who faithfully plants seeds in the Spring, who reaps a harvest in the Autumn. - B C Forbes
The chicken probably came before the egg because it is hard to imagine God wanting to sit on an egg. - Unknown
Love, like a chicken salad or restaurant hash, must be taken with blind faith or it loses its flavor. - Helen Rowland
Farming looks mighty easy when your plow is a pencil and you're a thousand miles from the corn field. - Dwight D Eisenhower
The attempt to combine wisdom and power has only rarely been successful, and then only for a short while. - Albert Einstein
I dream of a better tomorrow, where chickens can cross the road and not be questioned about their motives. - Ralph Waldo Emerson
I'm a farm boy. If we need five people to haul in hay, we don't take one and just work them to death. - Lincoln Davis
In school, every period ends with a bell. Every sentence ends with a period. Every crime ends with a sentence. - Steven Wright
The difference between involvement and commitment is like an eggs and ham breakfast: the chicken was involved, the pig was committed. - Unknown
Music embodies feeling without forcing it to contend and combine with thought, as it is forced in most arts and especially in the art of words. - Franz Liszt
Lincolnshire is the Idaho of England. You were either going to drive a tractor for the rest of your life or head for the city to work in a factory. - Bernie Taupin
Farming is a profession of hope. - Brian Brett
Farmers are the salt of the earth. - Unknown
Let's make hay while it lasts. - James Lovelock
Himalaya: A rooster that lays an egg - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Maybe I should just go home and ride my tractor. - Chuck Grassley
Do not count your chickens before they are hatched. - Aesop
If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages? - George Carlin
I had rather be on my farm than be emperor of the world. - George Washington
Farm: What a city man dreams of at 5 P.M., never at 5 A.M. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
There's going to be a real ding-dong when the bell goes. - David Coleman
A bumble bee is considerably faster than a John Deere tractor. - Unknown
Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you didn't cook it! - Gordon Ramsay
Gentleman Farmer: One who has more hay in the bank thank in the barn - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Work and pray, live on hay, you'll get pie in the sky when you die. - Joe Hill
A good farmer is nothing more nor less than a handyman with a sense of humus. - E.B. White
I have yet to hear a man ask for advice on how to combine marriage and a career. - Gloria Steinem
We need more young people involved in farming because the future needs real food. - Helena Sylvester
I am obsessed with Costco. I love the salmon and rotisserie chicken, the dog beds. - Kris Jenner
Farmers don't just work til the sun goes down; they work til the job gets done. - Unknown
My mother is no spring chicken although she has got as many chemicals in her as one. - Edna Everage
Abundance: 1. Big party held in a bakery; 2. A social event held in a farm building. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Is this chicken or is this fish? I know it's tuna but it says chicken of the sea. - Jessica Simpson
Underachiever: An employee who has squatters right on the far left side of the bell curve - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Of all sound of all bells... most solemn and touching is the peal which rings out the Old Year. - Charles Lamb
Cajun is country food by farmers and fisherman that arrived in Louisiana from Acadiana, Canada. - Paul Prudhomme
The key to everything is patience. You get the chicken by hatching the egg, not by smashing it. - Ellen Glasgow
Life on a farm is a school of patience. You can't hurry the crops or make an ox in two days. - Haneri Liogier
My brother thinks he's a chicken.
We don't talk him out of it because we need the eggs. - Groucho Marx
It is only the farmer who faithfully plants seeds in the Spring, who reaps a harvest in the Autumn. - B C Forbes
The chicken probably came before the egg because it is hard to imagine God wanting to sit on an egg. - Unknown
Love, like a chicken salad or restaurant hash, must be taken with blind faith or it loses its flavor. - Helen Rowland
Farming looks mighty easy when your plow is a pencil and you're a thousand miles from the corn field. - Dwight D Eisenhower
The attempt to combine wisdom and power has only rarely been successful, and then only for a short while. - Albert Einstein
I dream of a better tomorrow, where chickens can cross the road and not be questioned about their motives. - Ralph Waldo Emerson
I'm a farm boy. If we need five people to haul in hay, we don't take one and just work them to death. - Lincoln Davis
In school, every period ends with a bell. Every sentence ends with a period. Every crime ends with a sentence. - Steven Wright
The difference between involvement and commitment is like an eggs and ham breakfast: the chicken was involved, the pig was committed. - Unknown
Music embodies feeling without forcing it to contend and combine with thought, as it is forced in most arts and especially in the art of words. - Franz Liszt
Lincolnshire is the Idaho of England. You were either going to drive a tractor for the rest of your life or head for the city to work in a factory. - Bernie Taupin
see also Farm Section
Cat Nap
Chick Incubator
Family Reunion
Flamingo Imposter
Hen Pecked
Mom Lookout
Once Is Never Enough
Rooster Retirement
Super Hen
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13-Apr-2021 |