Atheist Holiday

U.S. court case sets new Atheist Holiday


In Florida, an atheist became incensed over the preparation of Easter and Passover holidays. He decided to contact his lawyer about the discrimination inflicted on atheists by the constant celebrations afforded to Christians and Jews with all their holidays while atheists had no holiday to celebrate.

The case was brought before a wise judge. After listening to the long passionate presentation by the lawyer, the Judge banged his gavel and declared, “Case Dismissed.”

The lawyer immediately stood and objected to the ruling and said, “Your Honor, how can you possibly dismiss this case? Christians have Christmas, Easter and many other observances. Jews have Passover, Yom Kippur and Hanukkah... yet my client and all other atheists have no such holidays.”

The judge leaned forward in his chair and simply said, “Obviously your client is too confused to even know about, much less celebrate, his own atheists’ holiday!”

The lawyer pompously said, “Your Honor, we are unaware of any such holiday for atheists. Just when might that holiday be, your Honor?”

The judge said, “Well it comes every year on exactly the same date... April 1st. Since our calendar sets April 1st as “April Fools Day,” consider Psalm 14:1 and Psalm 53 which state, “The fool says in his heart, there is no God.” Thus, in my opinion, if your client says there is no God, then by scripture he is a fool, thus April 1st is his holiday!”


Inner peace achieved through forgiveness - letting go of the past,
and drinking to the future ...

QuotaBills
Silence is the virtue of fools. - Francis Bacon

Justice delayed is justice denied. - William Gladstone

Common sense often makes good law. - William O Douglas

Generosity is the flower of justice. - Nathaniel Hawthorne

Lawyers are the jackals of commerce. - Elbert Hubbard

Lawsuits: Clothes worn by an attorney - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Don't judge your taco by its price. - Hunter S. Thompson

Do you not know that I am above the law? - James II

Fools are my theme, let satire be my song. - Lord Byron

Law cannot persuade where it cannot punish. - Thomas Fuller

Good lawyers know the law. Great lawyers know the judge. - Unknown

It is only shallow people who do not judge by appearances. - Oscar Wilde

Don't judge me. I was born to be awesome, not perfect. - Unknown

If there were no bad people there would be no good lawyers. - Charles Dickens

The innkeeper loves the drunkard, but not for a son-in-law. - Yiddish Proverb

What a cage is to the wild beast, law is to the selfish man. - Herbert Spencer

A judge is a law student who marks his own examination papers. - H L Mencken

Fools may our scorn, not envy raise,
For envy is a kind of praise. - John Gay

All the honesty in the world ain't legal tender for a loaf of bread. - Josh Billings

If you have ten thousand regulations you destroy all respect for the law. - Winston Churchill

He who will always be his own lawyer will often have a fool for a client. - J Hunter

Law school is the opposite of sex. Even when it's good it's lousy. - Unknown

A fellow who is always declaring he’s no fool usually has suspicions. - Wilson Miznor

The only thing a lawyer won't question is the legitimacy of his mother. - WC Fields

It took me a long time not to judge myself through someone else's eyes. - Sally Field

There are well-dressed foolish ideas, just as there are well-dressed fools. - Sebastien Chamfort

You cannot live without lawyers, and certainly you cannot die without them. - Joseph H Choate

Life is nothing but a competition to be the criminal rather than the victim. - Bertrand Russell

I just got back from a pleasure trip. I took my mother-in-law to the airport. - Henny Youngman

It's every lawyer's dream to help shape the law, not just react to it. - Alan Dershowitz

The surprising thing about young fools is how many survive to become old fools. - Doug Larson

Your mother's down there throwing a monkey wrench into the halls of justice. - Archie Bunker

Nobody has a more sacred obligation to obey the law than those who make the law. - Sophocles

People who use lawyers are not people you would really want to hang around with. - Deborah Ross

It is better to be a mouse in a cat's mouth than a man in a lawyer's hands. - Spanish Proverb

Do not correct a fool or he will hate you. Correct a wise man and he will appreciate you. - Unknown

Lawyers are like the knights of old. You can use them to plunder other people's stuff. - Gene Gordon

Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. - Plato

A lawyer is a gentleman that rescues your estate from your enemies and then keeps it to himself. - Henry P Brougham

The zombies were like Canadians, in that they looked enough like real people at first, to fool you. - Kelly Link

It is better to remain silent at the risk of being thought a fool, than to talk and remove all doubt of it. - Maurice Switzer

Shakespeare said pretty well everything and what he left out, James Joyce, with a judge from meself, put in. - Brendan Behan

Children begin by loving their parents; after a time they judge them; rarely, if ever, do they forgive them. - Oscar Wilde

When hungry, eat your rice; when tired, close your eyes. Fools may laugh at me, but wise men will know what I mean. - Lin-Chi

Men became scientific because they expected law in nature and they expected law in nature because they believed in a lawgiver. - Ravi Zacharias

There is a direct relationship between a person's grasp and experience of God's grace and his or her heart for justice. - Unknown

In my many years I have come to a conclusion that one useless man is a shame, two is a law firm, and three or more is a congress. - John Adams

A judge who likes every outcome he reaches is very likely a bad judge, stretching for results he prefers rather than those the law demands. - Neil Gorsuch

While awaiting sentencing, I decided to give stand-up comedy a shot. The judge had suggested I get my act together, and I took him seriously. - Tim Allen

There is only one categorical imperative: Act only according to that maxim by which you can at the same time will that it should become universal law. - Immanuel Kant


see also   Lawyer  &  Religious  Sections
Atheist Nativity Scene
Bible Reference - Emergency Contact Numbers
Center Of The Bible
God’s Little Instructions
Psalm 23
Justice Is Blind
Legal Assistance For All
Legal Exhibit
Psalm 109
Psalm 129
Psalm 404
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28-Jan-2021