Atheist Holiday

U.S. court case sets new Atheist Holiday


In Florida, an atheist became incensed over the preparation of Easter and Passover holidays. He decided to contact his lawyer about the discrimination inflicted on atheists by the constant celebrations afforded to Christians and Jews with all their holidays while atheists had no holiday to celebrate.

The case was brought before a wise judge. After listening to the long passionate presentation by the lawyer, the Judge banged his gavel and declared, “Case Dismissed.”

The lawyer immediately stood and objected to the ruling and said, “Your Honor, how can you possibly dismiss this case? Christians have Christmas, Easter and many other observances. Jews have Passover, Yom Kippur and Hanukkah... yet my client and all other atheists have no such holidays.”

The judge leaned forward in his chair and simply said, “Obviously your client is too confused to even know about, much less celebrate, his own atheists’ holiday!”

The lawyer pompously said, “Your Honor, we are unaware of any such holiday for atheists. Just when might that holiday be, your Honor?”

The judge said, “Well it comes every year on exactly the same date... April 1st. Since our calendar sets April 1st as “April Fools Day,” consider Psalm 14:1 and Psalm 53 which state, “The fool says in his heart, there is no God.” Thus, in my opinion, if your client says there is no God, then by scripture he is a fool, thus April 1st is his holiday!”


Inner peace achieved through forgiveness - letting go of the past,
and drinking to the future ...

QuotaBills
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In law, nothing is certain but the expense. - Samuel Butler

Judge a man by the reputation of his enemies. - Arabian Proverb

Wise men make proverbs, but fools repeat them. - Samuel Palmer

Keep skunks, bankers and lawyers at a distance. - Unknown

A genius from nine to five - a fool at the weekends. - Unknown

Whoever called it necking was a poor judge of anatomy. - Groucho Marx

Lawyers spend a great deal of their time shoveling smoke. - Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.

That's the spirit - one part brave, three parts fool. - Christopher Paolini

Who is more foolish? The fool or the fool who follows him? - Obi Wan Kenobi

I've never been in love. I've always been a lawyer. - Unknown

There is no grievance that is a fit object of redress by mob law. - Abraham Lincoln

He who breaks a resolution is a weakling. He who makes one is a fool. - F.M. Knowles

He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain what he cannot lose. - Jim Elliot

If you have ten thousand regulations you destroy all respect for the law. - Winston Churchill

The only thing a lawyer won't question is the legitimacy of his mother. - WC Fields

There are well-dressed foolish ideas, just as there are well-dressed fools. - Sebastien Chamfort

The first and fundamental law of nature is to seek out peace and follow it. - Thomas Hobbes

Any fool can paint a picture, but it takes a wise man to be able to sell it. - Samuel Butler

Marriage is really tough because you have to deal with feelings and lawyers. - Richard Pryor

The successful revolutionary is a statesman, the unsuccessful one a criminal. - Erich Fromm

I know that this defies the law of gravity, but, you see, I never studied law. - Bugs Bunny

Under the English legal system you are innocent until you are shown to be Irish. - Ted Whitehead

A jury consists of twelve people who determine which client has the better lawyer. - Robert Frost

On Valentine's Day, I wired flowers for my mother-in-law, but she found the fuse. - Milton Berle

The young man who has not wept is a savage, and the old man who will not laugh is a fool. - George Santayana

He that has no fools, knaves, nor beggars in his family was begot by a flash of lightning. - Thomas Fuller

Justice is the insurance we have on our lives, and obedience is the premium we pay for it. - William Penn

Law: an ordinance of reason for the common good, made by him who has care of the community. - Thomas Aquinas

Grammar, which knows how to lord it over kings, and with high hands makes them obey its laws. - Moliere

Getting out of jury duty is easy. The trick is to say you're prejudiced against all races. - Homer Simpson

Do not judge me by my successes, judge me by how many times I fell down and got back up again. - Nelson Mandela

If the laws could speak for themselves, they would complain of the lawyers in the first place. - George Savile

The ultimate result of shielding men from the effects of folly is to fill the world with fools. - Herbert Spencer

It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to open your mouth and remove all doubt. - Groucho Marx

My imagination makes me human and makes me a fool; it gives me all the world and exiles me from it. - Ursula K. Le Guin

He may look like an idiot and talk like an idiot but don't let that fool you. He really is an idiot. - Groucho Marx

It is better to remain silent at the risk of being thought a fool, than to talk and remove all doubt of it. - Maurice Switzer

The doctor sees all the weakness of mankind, the lawyer all the wickedness, the theologian all the stupidity. - Arthur Schopenhauer

People judge you by your actions, not your intentions. You may have a heart of gold, but so has a hard-boiled egg. - Unknown

Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain but it takes character and self control to be understanding and forgiving. - Dale Carnegie

You can always tell a real friend: when you make a fool of yourself, he doesn't feel you've done a permanent job. - Laurence Peter

Man's capacity for justice makes democracy possible, but man's inclination to injustice makes democracy necessary. - Reinhold Niebuhr

The greatest advantage I know of being thought a wit by the world is that it gives one the greater freedom of playing the fool. - Jonathan Swift

The hope of a secure and livable world lies with disciplined nonconformists who are dedicated to justice, peace and brotherhood. - Martin Luther King Jr.

The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, and wiser people so full of doubts. - Bertrand Russell

Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it was stupid. - Albert Einstein


see also   Lawyer  &  Religious  Sections
Atheist Nativity Scene
Bible Reference - Emergency Contact Numbers
Center Of The Bible
God’s Little Instructions
Psalm 23
Justice Is Blind
Legal Assistance For All
Legal Exhibit
Psalm 109
Psalm 129
Psalm 404
Youth Pastor’s Last Speech

 

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09-Apr-2020