When a man volunteers to do the BBQ the following chain of events are put into motion…
1) The woman buys the food.
2) The woman makes the salad, vegetables, and dessert.
3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to the man who is lounging beside the grill - beer in hand.
Here comes the important part…
4) THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL.
5) The woman goes inside to organize the plates and cutlery.
6) The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is burning. He thanks her and asks if she will bring another beer while he deals with the situation.
7) THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL AND HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN.
8) The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins, sauces, and brings them to the table.
9) After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes.
And most of all…
10) Everyone PRAISES the man and THANKS him for his cooking efforts.
11) The man asks the woman how she enjoyed “her night off.” And, upon seeing her
annoyed reaction, concludes that there’s just no pleasing some women!
Silence if the eternal duty of man. - Thomas Carlyle
A rich man has no need of character. - Hebrew Proverb
Money: the poor man's credit card. - Marshal McLuhan
Truth is the highest thing that man may keep. - Chaucer
Every man is like the company he is wont to keep. - Euripides
Man is made for something better than disturbing dirt. - Oscar Wilde
I am but a gatherer and disposer of other men's stuff. - Henry Wotton
Farm: What a city man dreams of at 5 P.M., never at 5 A.M. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
It is the weak man who urges compromise - never the strong man. - Elbert Hubbard
Man is a complex being: He makes deserts bloom - and lakes die. - Gil Stern
The successful warrior is the average man, with laser-like focus. - Bruce Lee
Children find everything in nothing; men find nothing in everything. - Giacomo Leopardi
Show me the man you honor, and I will know what kind of man you are. - Thomas Carlyle
I don't give a damn for a man that can only spell a word one way. - Mark Twain
What good is money if it can't inspire terror in your fellow man? - Homer Simpson
A man must learn to endure patiently what he cannot avoid conveniently. - Michel de Montaigne
It's impossible for a man to learn what he thinks he already knows. - Epictetus
Truly intelligent men know better than to take themselves too seriously. - Unknown
I have yet to hear a man ask for advice on how to combine marriage and a career. - Gloria Steinem
My mom said the only reason men are alive is for lawn care and vehicle maintenance. - Tim Allen
No honest work of man or woman "fails"; it feeds the sum of all human action. - Michelene Wandor
The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the man who cannot read them. - Mark Twain
When neither their property nor their honor is touched, the majority of men live content. - Niccolo Machiavelli
I believe that our Heavenly Father invented man because he was disappointed in the monkey. - Mark Twain
A man who wants to do something will find a way; a man who doesn't will find an excuse. - Stephen Dolley Jr.
The world is getting to be such a dangerous place... a man is lucky to get out of it alive. - WC Fields
College Professor: A man who gets what's left over after the football coach is paid off - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
You can always tell when a man's well informed. His views are pretty much like your own. - H Jackson Brown, Jr.
The laziest man I ever met put popcorn in his pancakes so they would turn over by themselves. - WC Fields
The fantasy of every Australian man is to have two women - one cleaning and the other dusting. - Maurenn Murphy
A successful man is one who can lay a firm foundation with the bricks that others throw at him. - Sidney Greenberg
Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power. - Abraham Lincoln
Character is that which reveals moral purposes, exposing the class of things man chooses or avoids. - Aristotle
If men could see the epitaphs their friends write they would believe they had got into the wrong grave. - American Proverb
The activist is not the man who says the river is dirty. The activist is the man who cleans up the river. - Ross Perot
Happy the man who has broken the chains which hurt the mind, and has given up worrying, once and for all. - Ovid
He that cannot forgive others breaks the bridge over which he must pass himself, for every man has need to be forgiven. - Thomas Fuller
Man's capacity for justice makes democracy possible, but man's inclination to injustice makes democracy necessary. - Reinhold Niebuhr
NASA's robot Curiosity landed on Mars. Early pictures show no signs of ESPN or beer. This makes it very clear that men are not from Mars. - Unknown
A neurotic is a man who builds a castle in the air. A psychotic is the man who lives in it. And a psychiatrist is a man who collects the rent. - Lord Webb-Johnson
see also Dining, Food & Marriage
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