Priest's Backwards Collar

A little boy gets on the bus, sits next to a man reading a newspaper, and notices he has his collar on backwards.
The little boy asks why he wears his collar that way.
The man, who is a priest, says, “I am a Father.”

The little boy replies, “My father doesn’t wear his collar like that.”
The priest looks up from his paper and answers, “I am the Father of many.”

The little boy says, “My dad has four girls, four boys, and two grandchildren, and he doesn’t wear his collar that way.”
The priest, getting impatient, says, “I am the Father of hundreds,” and went back to reading his paper.

The little boy sits quietly, but on leaving the bus, leans over and says, “Well, maybe you should wear your pants backwards instead of your collar.”

QuotaBills

Religion altars the mind. - Tony Follari

When you pray, move your feet. - African Proverb

One has only to die to be praised. - German Proverb

Go where your best prayers take you. - Frederick Buechner

Tea is a religion of the art of life. - Okakura Kakuzo

Profit: Religious guy who talks to God - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Will no one rid me of this turbulent priest? - Henry II

Religion is the search for ultimate meaning. - Viktor Frankl

One filled with joy preaches without preaching. - Mother Teresa

A puff of wind and popular praise weigh the same. - English Proverb

We have to pray on behalf of those who do not pray. - Mother Teresa

Babylon: What the Preacher does during some sermons - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

No, I look at the Senators and pray for the country. - Edward Everett Hale

He that searches for praise will often find contempt. - Norman MacDonald

When the problem is worry, the prescription is prayer. - David Jeremiah

When the gods wish to punish us they answer our prayers. - Oscar Wilde

Some of God's greatest gifts are unanswered prayers. - Garth Brooks

Prayer does not change God, but it changes him who prays. - Soren Kierkegaard

Because you know He can, you can pray with holy confidence. - Mark Batterson

True religion is the life we lead, not the creed we profess. - Louis Nizer

My wife is such a bad cook, in my house we pray after the meal. - Rodney Dangerfield

Praise is a rebuke to the man whose conscience alloweth it not. - Eliza Cook

Sometimes God allows what he hates to accomplish what he loves. - Joni Eareckson Tada

When it is a matter of money, all men are of the same religion. - Voltaire

A rigorous religion can be conceived and nurtured in ignorance. - Ravi Zacharias

The only time my prayers are never answered is on the golf course. - Billy Graham

Praise adds nothing to beauty - makes it neither better nor worse. - Marcus Aurelius

Praise follows truth afar off, and only overtakes her at the grave. - James R Lowell

To be born in India is to arrive into the world swimming in religion. - Ravi Zacharias

A sermon wept over is more acceptable with God than one gloried over. - Charles H Spurgeon

Work and pray, live on hay, you'll get pie in the sky when you die. - Joe Hill

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult. - Rita Rudner

You can't preach it like it is if you don't believe it like it was. - Vance Havner

Prayer is the difference between the best we can do and the best God can do. - Mark Batterson

There is a world of practical religion in simply being considerate of others. - Roger Babson

Italy is the home of art and swindling; home of religion and moral rottenness. - Mark Twain

Better to deserve praise without having it, than to have it without deserving it. - Ivan Panin

I am a story teller. If I wanted to send a message I would have written a sermon. - Phillip Pullman

I'm a Catholic deer hunter. I am happy to be clinging to my guns and my religion. - Paul Ryan

I'm not normally a praying man, but if you're up there, please save me, Superman! - Homer Simpson

Let praise be given equally to women as well as men who have been distinguished in virtue. - Plato

No man preaches his sermon well to others if he does not first preach it to his own heart. - John Owen

Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully as when they do it from religious conviction. - Blaise Pascal

The praise of others may be of use in teaching us, not what we are, but what we ought to be. - Julius C Hare

Most religious people accept medicine as a gift from God and reap the benefits of both realms. - Caroline Fraser

Your daily life is your temple and your religion. Whenever you enter into it take with you your all. - Kahlil Gibran

To give pleasure to a single heart by a single kind act is better than a thousand head-bowings in prayer. - Saadi

Even our hardest prayers are easy for the Omnipotent One to answer because there is no degree of difficulty. - Mark Batterson

The Muslim world is threatened by religious fanaticism. The Western world is threatened by secular fanaticism. - Dennis Prager

I preach as though Christ was crucified yesterday; rose again from the dead today; and is coming back tomorrow. - Martin Luther

Pain is a sign that we are alive. Problems are a sign that we are strong. Prayer is a sign that we are not alone. - Unknown

In 1953 there were two ways for an Irish Catholic boy to impress his parents: become a priest or attend Notre Dame. - Phil Donahue

The advantage of doing one's praising for oneself is that one can lay it on thick and exactly in the right places. - Samuel Butler

A group becomes a team when each member is sure enough of himself and his contribution to praise the skills of the others. - Norman G Shidle

I never considered a difference of opinion in politics, in religion, in philosophy, as cause for withdrawing from a friend. - Thomas Jefferson

Prayer gives a man the opportunity of getting to know a gentleman he hardly ever meets. I do not mean his maker, but himself. - William R Inge

But who prays for Satan? Who, in eighteen centuries, has had the common humanity to pray for the one sinner that needed it most? - Mark Twain

Some preachers think only of their sermon; others think only of themselves: the man who wins the soul is the man who aims at it. - Dean Hook

I find that the nicest and best people generally profess no religion at all, but are ready to like the best men of all religions. - Samuel Butler

The Muslim Prophet Mohammed was a big believer in charity and firmly established helping those in need as a basis of the religion. - Richard Engel

I ain't got no respect for no religion where the head guy claims he can't make no mistakes. Like he's, waddya call, inflammable. - Archie Bunker

I you can make any leading religion of the world look like complete nonsense, you can be sure of only one thing: you haven't understood it. - Wilfred Cantwell Smith

If a preacher is not first preaching to himself, better that he falls on the steps of the pulpit and breaks his neck than preaches that sermon. - John Calvin

To say that authority, whether secular or religious, supplies no ground for morality is not to deny the obvious fact that it supplies a sanction. - Joseph Addison

Our ancestors believed in magic, prayers, trickery, browbeating and bullying. I think it would be fair to sum that up as 'Irish politics'. - Flann O'Brien

Priest's Backwards Collar

Father of Many

13-Aug-2022