Fine: This is
the word we use at the end of any argument that we feel we are right about but need to
shut you up. NEVER use “fine” to describe how a woman looks. This will cause you
to have one of those arguments.
Five minutes: This is half an hour. It is equivalent to the five minutes that your
football game is going to last before you take out the trash, so I feel that it’s an even
trade.
Go Ahead (with raised eyebrows): This is a dare. One that will result in a woman getting
upset over “Nothing” and will end with the word “Fine”.
Go Ahead (normal eyebrows): This means “I give up” or “do what you want
because I don’t care”. You will get a raised eyebrow “Go Ahead” in just a
few minutes, followed by “Nothing” and “Fine” and she will talk to you
in about “Five Minutes” when she cools off.
Loud Sigh: This is not actually a word, but is still often a verbal statement very
misunderstood by men. A “Loud Sigh” means she thinks you are an idiot at that
moment and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over
“Nothing”.
Nothing: This means something and you should be on your toes. “Nothing” is
usually used to describe the feeling a woman has of wanting to turn you inside out, upside
down, and backwards. “Nothing” usually signifies an argument that will last
“Five Minutes” and end with the word “Fine”.
Oh: This word followed by any statement is trouble. Example; “Oh, let me get
that”. Or, “Oh, I talked to him about what you were doing last night”. If
she says “Oh” before a statement, run, do not walk, to the nearest exit. She
will tell you that she is “Fine” when she is done tossing your clothes out the
window, but do not expect her to talk to you for at least 2 days. “Oh” as the
lead to a sentence usually signifies that you are caught in a lie. Do not try to lie more
to get out of it, or you will get raised eyebrows “Go ahead” followed by acts so
unspeakable that I can’t bring myself to write about them.
Please Do: This is not a statement, it is an offer. A woman is giving you the chance to
come up with whatever excuse or reason you have for doing whatever it is that you have
done. You have a fair chance to tell the truth, so be careful and you shouldn’t get a
“That’s Okay”.
Soft Sigh: Again, not a word, but a verbal statement. “Soft Sighs” are one of
the few things that some men actually understand. She is content. Your best bet is to not
move or breathe and she will stay content.
Thanks: A woman is thanking you. Do not faint, just say you’re welcome.
Thanks A Lot: This is much different than “Thanks”. A woman will say,
“Thanks A Lot” when she is really ticked off at you. It signifies that you have
hurt her in some callous way, and will be followed by the “Loud Sigh”. Be
careful not to ask what is wrong after the “Loud Sigh”, as she will only tell
you “Nothing.”
That’s Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman can say to a man.
“That’s Okay” means that she wants to think long and hard before paying you
retributions for what ever it is that you have done. “That’s Okay” is often used
with the word “Fine” and used in conjunction with a raised eyebrow “Go
Ahead”. At some point in the near future when she has plotted and planned, you are
going to be in some mighty big trouble.
Civilized humanical relationships - Archie Bunker
I married beneath me. All women do. - Lady Nancy Astor
I like my whiskey old and my women young. - Errol Flynn
A woman's always younger than a man of equal years. - Elizabeth Barrett Browning
All women are crazy, it's only a question of degree. - WC Fields
Temptation is a woman's weapon and man's excuse. - H L Mencken
The proper basis for marriage is mutual misunderstanding. - Oscar Wilde
A woman's best protection is a little money of her own. - Clare B Luce
The quickest way to know a woman is to go shopping with her. - Marcelene Cox
A woman is an occasional pleasure but a cigar is always a smoke. - Groucho Marx
The more you invest in a marriage, the more valuable it becomes. - Amy Grant
There is no force more powerful than a woman determined to rise. - Unknown
If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it. - Unknown
Marriage is but for a little while. It is alimony that is forever. - Quentin Crisp
A woman will buy anything she thinks the store is losing money on. - Kin Hubbard
Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them. - Unknown
Find someone who will change your life, not just your relationship status. - Abdul'Rauf Hashmi
The testimony of a woman has only half the value of the testimony of a man. - Iranian Penal Code
A woman is like a teabag. Only in hot water do you realize how strong she is. - Nancy Reagan
Bargain Sale: A place where a woman can ruin one dress while she buys another - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
I've exercised with women so thin that buzzards followed them to their cars. - Erma Bombeck
An ugly woman is a disease of the stomach; a handsome woman a disease of the head. - Italian Proverb
Marriage is one of the few institutions that allow a man to do as his wife pleases. - Milton Berle
Only choose in marriage a woman whom you would choose as a friend if she were a man. - Joseph Joubert
An almost perfect relationship with his father was the earthly root of all his wisdom. - C S Lewis
Strengthen the female mind by enlarging it, and there will be an end to blind obedience. - Mary Wollstonecraft
We learn the most from imperfect relationships - things like forgiveness and compassion. - Andrea Thompson
If women ran the world we wouldn't have wars, just intense negotiations every 28 days. - Robin Williams
The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing - and then marry him. - Cher
The only reason they say 'Women and children first' is to test the strength of the lifeboats. - Jean Kerr
My love life is terrible. The last time I was inside a woman was when I visited the Statue of Liberty. - Woody Allen
A father is always making his baby into a little woman. And when she is a woman he turns her back again. - Enid Bagnold
Marriage is the only known example of the happy meeting of the immovable object and the irresistible force. - Ogden Nash
Women are like the police. They could have all the evidence in the world, but they still want the confession. - Chris Rock
How wrong it is for a woman to expect the man to build the world she wants, rather than to create it herself. - Anais Nin
Marriage always demands the greatest understanding of the art of insincerity possible between two human beings. - Vicki Baum
I wanted to be the first woman to burn her bra, but it would have taken the fire department four days to put it out. - Dolly Parton
Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who cannot sleep with the window shut, and a woman who cannot sleep with the window open. - George Bernard Shaw
If a woman says, 'Do what you want', do not do what you want. Stand still. Do not blink. Don't even breathe. Just play dead. - Unknown
see also Relationship Section
A Woman’s Mind
Before Online Dating
Before The Impact
Everything Men Know About Women
Female Attraction
Flower Shop For Men
iGifts
Looking For Your Wife?
Mission Gap - for Men & Women
Names of the Colours
Real Man’s Point System
Romance Lost
Secret Of A Long Marriage
Sheer Surprise
Understanding Women
When Men Shop For Groceries
Winning An Argument With A Woman
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