Signs for the Modern Woman

A thing of beauty is a joy forever. - John Keats

The woman that deliberates is lost. - Joseph Addison

I always say that beauty is only sin deep. - Saki

He who looketh upon a woman loseth a fender. - Auto repair shop

A man's only as old as the woman he feels. - Groucho Marx

Never argue with a woman, a winner, or a weapon. - Frank Dane

Unexpected intrusions of beauty. That is what life is. - Saul Bellow

Temptation is a woman's weapon and man's excuse. - H L Mencken

This is a feminist bookstore. There is no humour section. - John Callahan

Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world. - Wilhelm II

Trust no friend without faults, and love a woman, but no angel. - Doris Lessing

A woman is an occasional pleasure but a cigar is always a smoke. - Groucho Marx

Faddict: Someone who has to try every new trend that comes along - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I spent seven hours in a beauty shop... and that was for the estimate. - Phyllis Diller

I never saw anybody take so long to dress, and with such little result. - Oscar Wilde

Joy Of Motherhood: What a woman experiences when all the kids are in bed - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A woman's mind is cleaner than a man's: She changes it more often. - Oliver Herford

Why can't a woman be more like a dog, huh? So sweet, loving, attentive. - Kirk Douglas

In every man's heart there is a secret nerve that answers to the vibrations of beauty. - Christopher D Morley

Divorce = Rebirth: forget the past, replan your life, improve your appearance & rejuvenate! - Rossana Condoleo

You're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen, which doesn't say much for you. - Groucho Marx

The world is more malleable than you think and it's waiting for you to hammer it into shape. - Bono

Heav'n hath no rage like love to hatred turn'd,
Nor Hell a fury, like a woman scorned. - William Congreve

For marriage to be a success, every woman and every man should have her and his own bathroom. The end. - Catherine Zeta-Jones

Fashion is free speech, and one of the privileges, if not always one of the pleasures, of a free world. - Alison Lurie

Beauty and ugliness disappear equally under the wrinkles of age; one is lost in them, the other hidden. - Jonathan P Senn

A round man cannot be expected to fit in a square hole right away. He must have time to modify his shape. - Mark Twain

Sex between a man and a woman can be wonderful, provided you get between the right man and the right woman. - Woody Allen

No man succeeds without a good woman behind him. Wife or mother, if it is both, he is twice blessed indeed. - Godfrey Winn

The whole religious complexion of the modern world is due to the absence from Jerusalem of a lunatic asylum. - Havelock Ellis

Bruce Lee's fast pace, Jet Li's pretty style and Jet Li's acrobatics combine with Muay Thai for my own style. - Tony Jaa

Of the two lots, the woman's lot of perpetual motherhood, and the man's of perpetual babyhood, I prefer the man's. - Bernard Shaw

Twenty years of romance make a woman look like a ruin, but twenty years of marriage make her something like a public building. - Oscar Wilde

I don't care how many beauty treatments you have, I don't care which bag you're carrying - you have to have a dress. - Vivienne Westwood

From a shy, timid girl I had become a woman of resolute character, who could no longer be frightened by the struggle with troubles. - Anna Dostoevsky

Happiness? A good cigar, a good meal, a good cigar and a good woman - or a bad woman - it depends on how much happiness you can handle. - George Burns

At some point in life the world's beauty becomes enough. You don't need to photograph, paint or even remember it. It is enough. - Toni Morrison

Art owes its origin to nature. This beautiful creation supplied the first model, while the original teacher was that divine intelligence. - Giorgio Vasari

With the steady disintegration of the family in modern society over the last century, the role of the school in bridging the gap has become vital. - Stephen Covey

Style is that which indicates how the writer takes himself and what he is saying. It is the mind skating circles around itself as it moves forward. - Robert Frost