Dreaded Furniture Disease

When you’re old, status and pumping rust take on new proportions


I was thinking about how a status symbol of today is those cell phones that everyone has clipped on. I can’t afford one, so I’m wearing my garage door opener.

I spent a fortune on deodorant before I realized that people didn’t like me anyway.

I was thinking about old age and decided that it’s when you still have something on the ball, but you are just too tired to bounce it.

I thought about making a fitness movie, for folks my age. I’d call it: “Pumping Rust.”

I’ve got that dreaded furniture disease. That’s when your chest is falling into your drawers.

Application blanks always ask, ‘who is to be notified in case of an emergency.’ I think you should write, “A Good Doctor.”


see also   Aging  Section
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29-Feb-2020