Up With Carl

Television is democracy at its ugliest. - Paddy Chayefsky

It's the hottest thing on television. - Donald Trump

Television! Teacher, mother, secret lover! - Homer Simpson

I steal from every single movie ever made. - Quentin Tarantino

Television has raised writing to a new low. - Samuel Goldwyn

Fiction reveals the truth that reality obscures. - Jessamyn West

Ah, TV respects me. It laughs with me, not at me! - Homer Simpson

Love paid a price so hope could become a reality. - Susan Gaddis

Nothing is really real unless it happens on television. - Daniel J. Boorstin

Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one. - Albert Einstein

Sometimes the appropriate response to reality is to go insane. - Philip K. Dick

A lot of movies are about life, mine are like a slice of cake. - Alfred Hitchcock

In my last movie I played an unsympathetic character - myself. - Oscar Levant

Men don't care what's on TV. They only care what else is on TV. - Jerry Seinfeld

Being an actor on a movie set is like going to the playground at recess. - Melissa Leo

Since we cannot change reality, let us change the eyes which see reality. - Nikos Kazantzakis

Adding sound to movies would be like putting lipstick on the Venus de Milo. - Mary Pickford

Television: a medium. So called because it's neither rare nor well done. - Ernie Kovacs

Dinner and a movie? Forget that. I'd rather have a picnic and a waterfall. - Amanda Grace

In California, they don't throw their garbage away - they make it into TV shows. - Woody Allen

I will never stop doing stand-up; that's my career, but I will do movies in Hollywood. - Russell Peters

So many people are on television that don't know me, and they're like experts on me. - Donald Trump

Television has changed the American child from an irresistable force to an immovable object. - Laurence J Peter

I have had my television aerials removed. It is the moral equivalent of a prostate operation. - Malcolm Muggeridge

You said you have a dream. Make your wonderful dream a reality, and it will become your truth. - Pokemon

President Ford tells us all to bite the bullet and Betsy Ford goes on TV and shoots off her mouth. - Archie Bunker

Television was not intended to make human beings vacuous, but it is an emanation of their vacuity. - Malcolm Muggeridge

Morality binds and blinds. It binds us into teams... but thereby makes us go blind to objective reality. - Jonathan Haidt

By its very nature the beautiful is isolated from everything else. From beauty no road leads to reality. - Hannah Arendt

For a successful technology, reality must take precedence over public relations, for Nature cannot be fooled. - Richard P Feynman

I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book. - Groucho Marx

That's the kind of luck poor Mr. Lincoln had the night he went to the movies, and he sat in John Wilkes' booth. - Archie Bunker

With 'The A-Team,' it was like, 'Alright, I'm going to do a big popcorn movie and see how that feels.' - Joe Carnahan

The best reason to go to the movies is to be with other people. Eating the popcorn, being with other people you don't know. - Peter Weller

The depravity of man is at once the most empirically verifiable reality, but at the same time the most intellectually resisted fact. - Malcolm Muggeridge

I put my air conditioner in backwards. It got cold outside. The weatherman on TV was confused. "It was supposed to be hot today." - Steven Wright

You're not supposed to be so blind with patriotism that you can't face reality. Wrong is wrong, no matter who does it or who says it. - Malcolm X

Perhaps women have always been in closer contact with reality than men: it would seem to be the just recompense for being deprived of idealism. - Germaine Greer

What brought me into the TV business is what keeps me here and happy. You can learn something new every day if you have a really positive attitude. - Katie Couric

I could never have imagined that firing 67 people on national television would actually make me more popular, especially with the younger generation. - Donald Trump