Redneck Hedge Trimming

Measure twice, cut once. - Craftsman Aphorism

The human face is my landscape. - Joshua Reynolds

A little axe can cut down a big tree. - Jamaican Saying

Measure a thousand times and cut once. - Turkish Proverb

They should have a Barbie with a buzz cut. - Ellen DeGeneres

Stop all the clocks, cut off the telephone. - W H Auden

You trust your mother, but you cut the cards. - Unknown

Drama is real life with the dull bits cut out. - Alfred Hitchcock

Hedgehogs - why don't they just share the hedge? - Unknown

Eunuch: A man who has had his works cut out for him. - Robert Byrne

I had plastic surgery last week. I cut up my credit cards. - Henny Youngman

Wood burns faster when you have to cut and chop it yourself. - Harrison Ford

If pregnancy were a book, they would cut the last two chapters. - Nora Ephron

If you want to recapture your youth, just cut off his allowance. - Al Bernstein

I'm just like anyone. I cut and I bleed and I embarass easily. - Michael Jackson

You can cut all the flowers but you cannot keep Spring from coming. - Pablo Neruda

What a man needs in gardening is a cast-iron back with a hinge in it. - Charles D. Warner

The media landscape of the present day is a map in search of a territory. - J.G. Ballard

Gardening requires lots of water, most of it in the form of perspiration. - Lou Erickson

The grass may be greener on the other side, but it's just as hard to cut. - Little Richard

Lawyers are like scissors; they never cut each other, but what is between them. - Unknown

Everyone should be paid what he is worth, no matter how big a pay cut is involved. - Unknown

Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die. - Mel Brooks

Confidence is like a dragon where, for every head cut off, two more heads grow back. - Criss Jami

The task of the modern educator is not to cut down jungles, but to irrigate deserts. - C S Lewis

You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six. - Yogi Berra

After you cut off a person's nose there is no point in giving him a rose to smell. - Ravi Zacharias

A man begins cutting his wisdom teeth the first time he bites off more than he can chew. - Herb Caen

The greatest men have been those who have cut their way to success through difficulties. - F.W. Robertson

Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust. - John Webster

I just wasn't cut out to be a Chinese Tiger Mom. I'm more of an Irish Setter Dad. - P.J. O'Rourke

The beauty of the world has two edges, one of laughter, one of anguish, cutting the heart asunder. - Virginia Woolf

Too bad all the people who know how to run this country are busy running taxicabs or cutting hair. - George Burns

I'm honored to shake the hand of a brave Iraqi citizen who had his hand cut off by Saddam Hussein. - George W. Bush

Many people cycle or swim to keep trim. But if swimming is so good for the figure, how do you explain whales? - Charles Saatchi

Following his doctor's orders, Nikita (Khrushchev) has cut his drinking in half. He's leaving out the water. - Bob Hope

You love flowers, but you cut them. You love animals, but you eat them. You tell me you love me, so now I'm scared. - Unknown

Cut out the free feed for the boss hogs at the public trough and the spill-over they've been leaving us. We'll manage. - Paul Harvey

There is nothing in which the birds differ more from man than the way in which they can build and yet leave a landscape as it was before. - Robert Lynd

The more the diamond is cut the brighter it sparkles; and in what seems hard dealing, there God has no end in view but to perfect His people. - Thomas Guthrie