Redneck Coffee Table

Keep calm and run the table. - Unknown

Has Beans: Used coffee grounds - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Coffee and love taste best when hot. - German Proverb

Wherever I sit is the head of the table. - H.L. Mencken

Your messages are all the coffee I need. - Unknown

When coffee dreams, it dreams of chocolate. - Unknown

Should I kill myself, or have a cup of coffee? - Albert Camus

At a round table there is no dispute about place. - Italian Proverb

Where love sets the table, food tastes at its best. - French Proverb

I'd rather take coffee than compliments just now. - Louisa May Alcott

A mathematician is a device for turning coffee into theorems. - Paul Erdos

Everyone makes fun of the Redneck until the Zombie Apocalypse. - Unknown

I'd rather have roses on my table than diamonds on my neck. - Emma Goldman

The Meathead swooped down on the table like a plague of crocuses. - Archie Bunker

Death is nature's way of saying, "Your table is ready." - Robin Williams

The man who can dominate a London dinner-table can dominate the world. - Oscar Wilde

Without my morning coffee, I'm just like a dried-up piece of goat. - J.S. Bach

What would life be without coffee? But then, what is it even with coffee? - King Louis XV

The colder the X-Ray table, the more of your body is required to be on it. - Steven Wright

Thirteen at a table is unlucky only when the hostess has only twelve chops. - Groucho Marx

I never drink coffee at lunch - I find it keeps me awake for the afternoon. - Ronald Reagan

You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't. - Jeff Foxworthy

One day my mortal body will turn to dust, but the Turkish Republic will stand forever. - Mustafa Kemel Ataturk

The less Holy Spirit we have, the more cake and coffee we need to keep the church going. - Reinhard Bonnke

I just want a hot cup of coffee, black, and I don't want to hear about your troubles. - Charles Bukowski

The other night I ate at a real nice family restaurant. Every table had an argument going. - George Carlin

If this is coffee, please bring me some tea. But if this is tea, please bring me some coffee. - Abraham Lincoln

Bad Luck: To have thirteen people seated at the table when you’re paying for the drinks - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Jitterbug: 1. A Scotchman in front of a pay toilet; 2. Insect that's had too much coffee. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

You haven't had enough coffee until you can thread a sewing machine while it's running. - Unknown

Life as pool table,
White is focus,
Others, targets.
Stick is your driving force! - Stricketer

You might be a redneck if your favorite hunting dog has a bigger tombstone than your grandfather. - Jeff Foxworthy

It is not hard to compose, but what is fabulously hard is to leave the superfluous notes under the table. - Johannes Brahms

You might be a redneck if your wheelbarrow breaks and it takes four relatives to figure out how to fix it. - Jeff Foxworthy

May I never be drunk enough to try to play a foosball table alone like that dude over there who actually is. - Dr. Okay Times

For a great gaming experience, make sure the rails, cushion and slate of the pool table are of the best quality. - Unknown

You can imagine me as a kid growing up in redneck Texas with ballet shoes, tucking the violin under my arm. I had to fight my way up. - Patrick Swayze

A giraffe's coffee would be cold by the time it reached the bottom of its throat. Ever think about that? No. You only think about yourself. - Unknown

You need the kind of objectivity that makes you forget everything you've heard, clear the table, and do a factual study like a scientist would. - Steve Wozniak

Blind dates are treacherous. You don't know who this person is. You wonder, "Should I call my grandma during coffee to get out of this?" - Alan Alda