[These four classified ads appeared in a newspaper on four consecutive days... the last
three hopelessly trying to correct the first day’s mistake...]
MONDAY
“For sale - SK Sharath has a sewing machine for sale. Phone 255-0707 after 7PM and ask for Mrs Mani who lives with him cheap.”
TUESDAY
Notice: We regret having erred in SK Sharath’s ad yesterday. It should have read:
“One sewing machine for sale cheap. Phone 255-0707 and ask for Mrs Mani, who lives with him
after 7PM.”
WEDNESDAY
Notice: SK Sharath has informed us that he has received several annoying telephone calls because of the error we made in the classified ad yesterday. The ad stands correct as follows:
“For sale - SK Sharath has a sewing machine for sale. Cheap. Phone 255-0707 after 7PM and ask for Mrs Mani who loves with him.”
THURSDAY
“Notice: I, SK Sharath, have no sewing machine for sale. I smashed it. Don’t call 255-0707 as I have had the phone disconnected. I have not been carrying on with Mrs Mani. Until yesterday, she was my housekeeper but she quit.”
Your culture is your brand. - Tony Hsieh
These are cathedrals of shopping. - Emile Zola
It costs a lot to build bad products. - Norman Augustine
I try to figure out the marketing puzzle. - Nelson Peltz
Inequality of knowledge is the key to a sale. - Neil O Gustafson
Social media are tools. Real time is a mindset. - David M. Scott
By listening, marketing will re-learn how to talk. - David Weinberger
Crying is for plain women. Pretty women go shopping. - Oscar Wilde
I intend to build this brand again... Elite is legendary. - Donald Trump
For corporate marketers, podcasting is low-hanging fruit. - Paul Gillin
A brand new vacuum cleaner with all the latest attractions - Archie Bunker
The quickest way to know a woman is to go shopping with her. - Marcelene Cox
Advertising is the greatest art form of the twentieth century. - Marshall McLuhan
Traditional methods of sales prospecting are grossly inefficient. - Jill Konrath
Marketing and innovation are the two chief functions of business. - Peter F Drucker
Increasingly, the mass marketing is turning into a mass of niches. - Chris Anderson
A good thing sells itself; a bad thing advertises itself for sale. - African Saying
When all you've got is a hammer, bad service looks like a nail. - Doc Searls
Advertising has annihilated the power of the most powerful adjectives. - Paul Valery
Don't be afraid to get creative and experiment with your marketing. - Mike Volpe
Either write something worth reading or do something worth writing about. - Benjamin Franklin
Marketing is trying to figure out what people want so you can give it to them. - Shelly Lazarus
Advertising Agency: Eighty-five percent confusion and fifteen percent commission. - Fred Allen
There is no such thing as a bad client, but there such a thing as bad advertising. - Jerry D Femina
Marketers need to build digital relationships and reputation before closing a sale. - Chris Brogan
We have always said that advertising is just the icing on the cake. It is not the cake. - Meg Whitman
Shopping: The fine art of acquiring things you don't need with money you don't have. - Unknown
Half the money I spend on advertising is wasted; the trouble is, I don't know which half. - John Wannamaker
No matter what, the very first piece of social media real estate I'd start with is a blog. - Chris Brogan
I went to a garage sale. "How much for the garage?" "It's not for sale." - Steven Wright
Companies need to lighten up and take themselves less seriously. They need to get a sense of humor. - Unknown
The way you can understand all of the social media is as the creation of a new kind of public space. - Danah Boyd
Before you create any more 'great content,' figure out how you are going to market it first. - Joe Pulizzi
Networking is marketing. Marketing yourself, marketing your uniqueness, marketing what you stand for. - Christine Comaford-Lynch
Advertising promotes the divine discontent which makes people strive to improve their economic status. - Ralph Butler
Everything is for sale in Hollywood; the fairy tale, the costume, the pumpkin, the footman and the mice. - Amanda Eliasch
It no longer makes economic sense to send an advertising message to the many in hopes of persuading the few. - M. Lawrence Light
Advertising may be described as the science of arresting human intelligence long enough to get money from it. - Stephen Leacock
Word-of-mouth marketing has always been important. Today, it's more important than ever because of the Internet. - Newt Barrett
The aim of marketing is to know and understand the customer so well the product or service fits him and sells itself. - Peter F Drucker
Doing business without advertising is like winking at a girl in the dark. You know what you are doing, but nobody else does. - Stuart H Britt
Understand the key factors in the math behind viral marketing, and use those to figure out what it takes to get viral growth. - David Skok
My greatest strength is common sense. I'm really a standard brand - like Campbell's tomato soup or Baker's chocolate. - Katharine Hepburn
Instead of one-way interruption, Web marketing is about delivering useful content at just the precise moment that a buyer needs it. - David M. Scott
Advertising is a valuable economic factor because it is the cheapest way of selling goods, particularly if the goods are worthless. - Sinclair Lewis
Search, a marketing method that didn't exist a decade ago, provides the most efficient and inexpensive way for businesses to find leads. - John Battelle
Let advertisers spend the same amount of money improving their product that they do on advertising and they wouldn't need to advertise it. - Will Rogers
Advertising moves the goods - if it's good advertising. Bad advertising doesn't move the goods because it doesn't move the buyers. - Unknown
Social media is about friending someone so they'll invite you to a party or get you a job. If that's the work, Snapchat is the playground. - Evan Spiegel
If you have more money than brains, you should focus on outbound marketing. If you have more brains than money, you should focus on inbound marketing. - Guy Kawasaki
These are cathedrals of shopping. - Emile Zola
It costs a lot to build bad products. - Norman Augustine
I try to figure out the marketing puzzle. - Nelson Peltz
Inequality of knowledge is the key to a sale. - Neil O Gustafson
Social media are tools. Real time is a mindset. - David M. Scott
By listening, marketing will re-learn how to talk. - David Weinberger
Crying is for plain women. Pretty women go shopping. - Oscar Wilde
I intend to build this brand again... Elite is legendary. - Donald Trump
For corporate marketers, podcasting is low-hanging fruit. - Paul Gillin
A brand new vacuum cleaner with all the latest attractions - Archie Bunker
The quickest way to know a woman is to go shopping with her. - Marcelene Cox
Advertising is the greatest art form of the twentieth century. - Marshall McLuhan
Traditional methods of sales prospecting are grossly inefficient. - Jill Konrath
Marketing and innovation are the two chief functions of business. - Peter F Drucker
Increasingly, the mass marketing is turning into a mass of niches. - Chris Anderson
A good thing sells itself; a bad thing advertises itself for sale. - African Saying
When all you've got is a hammer, bad service looks like a nail. - Doc Searls
Advertising has annihilated the power of the most powerful adjectives. - Paul Valery
Don't be afraid to get creative and experiment with your marketing. - Mike Volpe
Either write something worth reading or do something worth writing about. - Benjamin Franklin
Marketing is trying to figure out what people want so you can give it to them. - Shelly Lazarus
Advertising Agency: Eighty-five percent confusion and fifteen percent commission. - Fred Allen
There is no such thing as a bad client, but there such a thing as bad advertising. - Jerry D Femina
Marketers need to build digital relationships and reputation before closing a sale. - Chris Brogan
We have always said that advertising is just the icing on the cake. It is not the cake. - Meg Whitman
Shopping: The fine art of acquiring things you don't need with money you don't have. - Unknown
Half the money I spend on advertising is wasted; the trouble is, I don't know which half. - John Wannamaker
No matter what, the very first piece of social media real estate I'd start with is a blog. - Chris Brogan
I went to a garage sale. "How much for the garage?" "It's not for sale." - Steven Wright
Companies need to lighten up and take themselves less seriously. They need to get a sense of humor. - Unknown
The way you can understand all of the social media is as the creation of a new kind of public space. - Danah Boyd
Before you create any more 'great content,' figure out how you are going to market it first. - Joe Pulizzi
Networking is marketing. Marketing yourself, marketing your uniqueness, marketing what you stand for. - Christine Comaford-Lynch
Advertising promotes the divine discontent which makes people strive to improve their economic status. - Ralph Butler
Everything is for sale in Hollywood; the fairy tale, the costume, the pumpkin, the footman and the mice. - Amanda Eliasch
It no longer makes economic sense to send an advertising message to the many in hopes of persuading the few. - M. Lawrence Light
Advertising may be described as the science of arresting human intelligence long enough to get money from it. - Stephen Leacock
Word-of-mouth marketing has always been important. Today, it's more important than ever because of the Internet. - Newt Barrett
The aim of marketing is to know and understand the customer so well the product or service fits him and sells itself. - Peter F Drucker
Doing business without advertising is like winking at a girl in the dark. You know what you are doing, but nobody else does. - Stuart H Britt
Understand the key factors in the math behind viral marketing, and use those to figure out what it takes to get viral growth. - David Skok
My greatest strength is common sense. I'm really a standard brand - like Campbell's tomato soup or Baker's chocolate. - Katharine Hepburn
Instead of one-way interruption, Web marketing is about delivering useful content at just the precise moment that a buyer needs it. - David M. Scott
Advertising is a valuable economic factor because it is the cheapest way of selling goods, particularly if the goods are worthless. - Sinclair Lewis
Search, a marketing method that didn't exist a decade ago, provides the most efficient and inexpensive way for businesses to find leads. - John Battelle
Let advertisers spend the same amount of money improving their product that they do on advertising and they wouldn't need to advertise it. - Will Rogers
Advertising moves the goods - if it's good advertising. Bad advertising doesn't move the goods because it doesn't move the buyers. - Unknown
Social media is about friending someone so they'll invite you to a party or get you a job. If that's the work, Snapchat is the playground. - Evan Spiegel
If you have more money than brains, you should focus on outbound marketing. If you have more brains than money, you should focus on inbound marketing. - Guy Kawasaki
see also Daffynitions, Language & Quote Sections
Church Bulletin Bloopers
Engrish
Flubbed Headlines
Headline Stories
Newspaper Bloopers
Resumé Bloopers
Crap Sale
Demo House For Sale
Digital Camera For Sale - Only Used Once
Donut Sale
“End Of World” Car Sale
Far Wood Sale
For Sale, Due To Market Changes
For Sale - One Useless Cat
GM’s Scratch and Dent Sale
Groj Sale
Groj Sale In The Country
Guard Dog For Sale
Half House For Sale
Hay For Sale
iPad For Sale
Lamp Post For Sale
Leaf Blower for Sale
Motorcycle For Sale
New Batch For Sale
Peanut Sale
Pen Sale Not
Pickup For Sale - Come Get It Quick!
Pony For Sale
Puppies For Sale
Redneck Estate Sale
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Steak Sale
Swimming Pool For Sale - House Not Included
Used Cows For Sale
Wedding Dress For Sale
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25-Feb-2020 |