Fatherly Advice

Dad & Son talk... be-fore it’s too late!


A father spoke to his son, “It’s time we had a little talk, my son. Soon you will have urges and feelings you’ve never had before. Your heart will pound and your hands will sweat. You’ll be preoccupied and won’t be able to think of anything else.”

He added, “But don’t worry, it’s perfectly normal... it’s called golf.”


QuotaBills
All is fair in love and golf. - American Proverb

The Child is father of the Man. - William Wordsworth

Golf is an easy game, it's just hard to play. - Unknown

The older I get, the smarter my father seems to get. - Tim Russert

Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do. - Luke 23:24

A father carries pictures where his money used to be. - Steve Martin

A father is the one friend upon whom we can always rely. - Emile Gaboriau

Retire to what? I already play golf and fish for a living. - Julius Boros

My Father had a profound influence on me, he was a lunatic. - Spike Milligan

To a father growing old, nothing is dearer than a daughter. - Euripides

The income tax has made liars out of more Americans than golf. - Will Rogers

Hold me, grip me, cherish me, pretend that I'm a golf club! - Unknown

She got her good looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon. - Groucho Marx

My father would take me to the playground, and put me on mood swings. - Jay London

Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die. - The Princess Bride

Income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has. - Will Rogers

How has retirement affected my golf game? A lot more people beat me now. - Dwight D Eisenhower

In golf as in life, it's the follow-through that makes the difference. - Unknown

Retirement means no pressure, no stress, no heartache... unless you play golf. - Gene Perret

It is impossible to imagine Goethe or Beethoven being good at billiards or golf. - H L Mencken

If you think it's hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball. - Jack Lemmon

It is easier for a father to have children than for children to have a real father. - Pope John XXIII

I haven't taught people in 50 years what my father taught by example in one week. - Mario Cuomo

My father had a piano that was a nickelodeon - put a nickel, and the roller would play. - Frank Sinatra

I'm so ugly my father carries around the picture of the kid who came with his wallet. - Rodney Dangerfield

One of the quickest ways to meet new people is to pick up the wrong ball on a golf course. - Unknown

I only hope when I have my own family that every day I see a little more of my father in me. - Keith Urban

I played golf. I didn't get a hole in one, but I did hit a guy. That's way more satisfying. - Mitch Hedberg

Don't you just hate it when you try to think of something other than golf... and you can't? - Mike Purkey

Give me golf clubs, fresh air and a beautiful partner, and you can keep the clubs and the fresh air. - Jack Benny

I am an expert of electricity. My father occupied the chair of applied electricity at the state prison. - WC Fields

By the time a man realizes that maybe his father was right, he usually has a son who thinks he's wrong. - Charles Wadsworth

In most homes, the father is concerned with parking space, the children with outer space, and the mother with closet space. - Evan Esar

A father is neither an anchor to hold us back nor a sail to take us there, but a guiding light whose love shows us the way. - Unknown

Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps. - Tiger Woods

My father instilled in me that if you don't see things happening the way you want them to, you get out there and make them happen. - Susan Powter

My father said there were two kinds of people in the world: givers and takers. The takers may eat better, but the givers sleep better. - Marlo Thomas

Learning to play golf is like learning to play the violin. It's not only difficult to do, it's very painful to everyone around you. - Hal Linden

How shall a man escape from his ancestors, or draw off from his veins the black drop which he drew from his father’s or mother's life? - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Chutzpa is that quality enshrined in a man who, having killed his mother and father, throws himself on the mercy of the court because he is an orphan. - Leo Rosten


see also   Golf  Section
Father Sayings for Father’s Day
Father’s Day Selfie
Ways to say “Dad” in Different Languages

 

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10-May-2021