A father spoke to his son, “It’s time we had a little talk, my son. Soon you will have urges and feelings you’ve never had before. Your heart will pound and your hands will sweat. You’ll be preoccupied and won’t be able to think of anything else.”
He added, “But don’t worry, it’s perfectly normal... it’s called golf.”
No. I am your Father. - Darth Vader
Golf is a puzzle without an answer. - Gary Player
Golf is an easy game, it's just hard to play. - Unknown
Golf is not so much a sport as an insult to lawns. - Unknown
The older I get, the smarter my father seems to get. - Tim Russert
Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do. - Luke 23:24
I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father. - Greg Norman
Hold me, grip me, cherish me, pretend that I'm a golf club! - Unknown
If it weren't for golf, I'd probably be a caddie today. - George Archer
Golf is a game where the ball lies poorly, and the players well. - Unknown
When I die, bury me on the golf course so my husband will visit. - Unknown
Whatsoever was the father of a disease, an ill diet was the mother. - George Herbert
Every child needs a father. Even if he turns out to be Darth Vader. - Jackson Radcliffe
My father would take me to the playground, and put me on mood swings. - Jay London
I don't need to know where the green is. Where is the golf course? - Babe Ruth
Income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has. - Will Rogers
The best thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother. - John Wooden
In golf as in life, it's the follow-through that makes the difference. - Unknown
Humour is based on a modicum of truth. Ever heard a joe-k about a father-in-law? - Dick Clark
I haven't taught people in 50 years what my father taught by example in one week. - Mario Cuomo
My father used to say, "Don't raise your voice. Improve your argument." - Desmond Tutu
Golf is the worst drug in the world. You just keep coming back fro more embarrassment. - Deacon Jones
One of the most important things a father can do for his children is to love their mother. - Ray Chenoweth
I believe that our Heavenly Father invented man because he was disappointed in the monkey. - Mark Twain
I have a tip that can take five strokes off anyone's golf game. It's called an eraser. - Arnold Palmer
If NASA really wants to find water on Mars, they should just send me there to hit a golf ball. - Gene Jaster
They say that life is a lot like golf - don't believe them. Golf is a lot more complicated. - Gardner Dickinson
That he delights in the misery of others no man will confess, and yet what other motive can make a father cruel? - Joseph Addison
A father is a life source, a protector, a life coach, a provider, and many more. You are special and indispensable. - Unknown
In most homes, the father is concerned with parking space, the children with outer space, and the mother with closet space. - Evan Esar
I still play hockey every now and then, and I still golf. But my biggest exercise is walking my big dog in the park every day. - Michael J. Fox
Golf is like a love affair: If you don't take it seriously, it's no fun; if you do take it seriously, it breaks your heart. - Arthur Daley
Golf is a game whose aim is to hit a very small ball into an even smaller hole, with weapons singularly ill designed for the purpose. - Winston Churchill
My father instilled in me that if you don't see things happening the way you want them to, you get out there and make them happen. - Susan Powter
My father said there were two kinds of people in the world: givers and takers. The takers may eat better, but the givers sleep better. - Marlo Thomas
My father was a baker and a lot of people do what their families did and I could have done that but I wanted to stay in show business. - Christopher Walken
Learning to play golf is like learning to play the violin. It's not only difficult to do, it's very painful to everyone around you. - Hal Linden
When I was born the doctor came out to the waiting room and told my father, "We did everything we could... but he pulled through." - Rodney Dangerfield
If Obama resigns from office NOW, thereby doing a great service to the country, I will give him free lifetime golf at any one of my courses. - Donald Trump
Luke, you can destroy the Emperor. He has foreseen this. It is your destiny. Join me, and together we can rule the galaxy as father and son. - Darth Vader
Golf is a puzzle without an answer. - Gary Player
Golf is an easy game, it's just hard to play. - Unknown
Golf is not so much a sport as an insult to lawns. - Unknown
The older I get, the smarter my father seems to get. - Tim Russert
Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do. - Luke 23:24
I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father. - Greg Norman
Hold me, grip me, cherish me, pretend that I'm a golf club! - Unknown
If it weren't for golf, I'd probably be a caddie today. - George Archer
Golf is a game where the ball lies poorly, and the players well. - Unknown
When I die, bury me on the golf course so my husband will visit. - Unknown
Whatsoever was the father of a disease, an ill diet was the mother. - George Herbert
Every child needs a father. Even if he turns out to be Darth Vader. - Jackson Radcliffe
My father would take me to the playground, and put me on mood swings. - Jay London
I don't need to know where the green is. Where is the golf course? - Babe Ruth
Income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has. - Will Rogers
The best thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother. - John Wooden
In golf as in life, it's the follow-through that makes the difference. - Unknown
Humour is based on a modicum of truth. Ever heard a joe-k about a father-in-law? - Dick Clark
I haven't taught people in 50 years what my father taught by example in one week. - Mario Cuomo
My father used to say, "Don't raise your voice. Improve your argument." - Desmond Tutu
Golf is the worst drug in the world. You just keep coming back fro more embarrassment. - Deacon Jones
One of the most important things a father can do for his children is to love their mother. - Ray Chenoweth
I believe that our Heavenly Father invented man because he was disappointed in the monkey. - Mark Twain
I have a tip that can take five strokes off anyone's golf game. It's called an eraser. - Arnold Palmer
If NASA really wants to find water on Mars, they should just send me there to hit a golf ball. - Gene Jaster
They say that life is a lot like golf - don't believe them. Golf is a lot more complicated. - Gardner Dickinson
That he delights in the misery of others no man will confess, and yet what other motive can make a father cruel? - Joseph Addison
A father is a life source, a protector, a life coach, a provider, and many more. You are special and indispensable. - Unknown
In most homes, the father is concerned with parking space, the children with outer space, and the mother with closet space. - Evan Esar
I still play hockey every now and then, and I still golf. But my biggest exercise is walking my big dog in the park every day. - Michael J. Fox
Golf is like a love affair: If you don't take it seriously, it's no fun; if you do take it seriously, it breaks your heart. - Arthur Daley
Golf is a game whose aim is to hit a very small ball into an even smaller hole, with weapons singularly ill designed for the purpose. - Winston Churchill
My father instilled in me that if you don't see things happening the way you want them to, you get out there and make them happen. - Susan Powter
My father said there were two kinds of people in the world: givers and takers. The takers may eat better, but the givers sleep better. - Marlo Thomas
My father was a baker and a lot of people do what their families did and I could have done that but I wanted to stay in show business. - Christopher Walken
Learning to play golf is like learning to play the violin. It's not only difficult to do, it's very painful to everyone around you. - Hal Linden
When I was born the doctor came out to the waiting room and told my father, "We did everything we could... but he pulled through." - Rodney Dangerfield
If Obama resigns from office NOW, thereby doing a great service to the country, I will give him free lifetime golf at any one of my courses. - Donald Trump
Luke, you can destroy the Emperor. He has foreseen this. It is your destiny. Join me, and together we can rule the galaxy as father and son. - Darth Vader
see also Golf Section
Father Sayings for Father’s Day
Father’s Day Selfie
Ways to say “Dad” in Different Languages
 Seal Survival |  The Power Of Faith |  Jesus Was Here |  Palm Sunday Social Distancing Service |  Pine Trees Know When It's Easter |
 Beware Of Who Is Watching Over Your Church |  Handicap Ramp |  Kick Out Boxing |  Patience and Wisdom |  Submarine Racing |
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 Family Planning Advice |  Cracks Me Up |  Anger Release Machine |  Closing Time |  Beach Breakfast |
05-Apr-2020 |