Almost Everything’s Bigger in Texas

Home on the Range for an Aussie


A Texan farmer goes to Australia for a vacation and meets an Aussie farmer.

The Aussie shows off his big wheat field and the Texan says, “Oh? We have wheat fields that are at least twice at large!”

Then they walk around the ranch a little, and the Aussie shows off his herd of cattle. The Texan immediately says, “We have longhorns that are at least twice as large as your cows.”

The conversation almost dies when the Texan sees a herd of kangaroos hopping through the field.

He asks, “And what are those?”

The Aussie replies with an incredulous look, “Don’t you have any grasshoppers in Texas?”


QuotaBills
No bed is big enough to hold three. - German Proverb

The big print giveth and the fine print taketh away. - Fulton J Sheen

Social media allows big companies to act small again. - Jay Baer

It doesn't take a very big person to carry a grudge. - Unknown

Big changes in our lives are more or less a second chance. - Harrison Ford

My bottom is so big it's got its own gravitational field. - Carol Vorderman

I'm super laid back. I'm from Texas. I love my family. - Selena Gomez

A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of. - Jane Austen

Don King is a big ... thief, and everyone in this room knows it. - Donald Trump

The folks in Mississippi are saying, 'Thank God for Texas.' - Kinky Friedman

I have little hair because my brain is so big it pushes the hair out. - Silvio Berlusconi

I also do my own processing, so it means a big commitment in lab time. - Leonard Nimoy

Figuring out what the next big trend is tells us what we should focus on. - Mark Zuckerberg

Acting is merely the art of keeping a large group of people from coughing. - Ralph Richardson

You can never get a cup of tea big enough or a book long enough to suit me. - C S Lewis

Roses are red, Pizza sauce is too, I ordered a large, and None of it is for you. - Unknown

Abundance: 1. Big party held in a bakery; 2. A social event held in a farm building. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

We'll have a big bowl of spaghetti and a plate of some of that veal scallopeepee. - Archie Bunker

Make the lie big, make it simple, keep saying it, and eventually they will believe it. - Adolf Hitler

I am who I am: an Irish Catholic kid, working class from Long Island. And I made it big. - Bill O'Reilly

The big question is whether you are going to be able to say a hearty yes to your adventure. - Joseph Campbell

I came from a big family. As a matter of fact, I never got to sleep alone until I was married. - Lewis Grizzard

The definition of insanity in Texas is so insane that it's impossible to be insane in Texas. - Malcolm McDowell

Technology made large populations possible; large populations now make technology indispensable. - Joseph Krutch

If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name at a Swiss bank. - Woody Allen

Large, naked, raw carrots are acceptable as food only to those who live in hutches awaiting Easter. - Fran Lebowitz

Bond reflected that good Americans were fine people and that most of them seemed to come from Texas. - Ian Fleming

I don't think I'm a celebrity. I'm just a guy from east Texas who loves cars and airplanes. - Carroll Shelby

When governments become large, voters cannot exercise close oversight, otherwise known as political power. - Maggie Gallagher

Don't be afraid to take a big step if one is indicated. You can't cross a chasm in two small jumps. - David Lloyd George

When ordinary people decide to step out and be part of something big, that's when they become extraordinary. - Brett Harris

Life is one big road with lots of signs. So when you're riding through the ruts, don't complicate your mind. - Bob Marley

With 'The A-Team,' it was like, 'Alright, I'm going to do a big popcorn movie and see how that feels.' - Joe Carnahan

Happiness always looks small while you hold it in your hands, but let it go, and you learn at once how big and precious it is. - Maxim Gorky

If you like the outdoors, Colorado is a big adventure playground for adults: it's great for skiing, cycling, climbing, and hiking. - Tyler Hamilton

I'm very anxious to see who the fans choose for their favorite finalist. Their decision could have a big effect on my ultimate decision. - Donald Trump

People who don't take risks generally make about two big mistakes a year. People who do take risks generally make about two big mistakes a year. - Peter F Drucker

Your surfing can get better on every turn, on every wave you catch. Learn to read the ocean better. A big part of my success has been wave knowledge. - Kelly Slater

My mother had a slender, small body, but a large heart - a heart so large that everybody's joys found welcome in it, and hospitable accommodation. - Mark Twain

In small towns as well as large, good people outnumber bad people by 100 to 1. In big towns the 100 are nervous. But in small towns, it's the one. - Paul Harvey


see also   Farm  Section
Everything Is Bigger In Texas
My Daughter & My Money
Survivor - Texas Style (2013)
Texas Bank Security
Texas Office Chair
Texas Wink
Why We Live in Texas

 

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27-Oct-2020