Almost Everything’s Bigger in Texas

Home on the Range for an Aussie


A Texan farmer goes to Australia for a vacation and meets an Aussie farmer.

The Aussie shows off his big wheat field and the Texan says, “Oh? We have wheat fields that are at least twice at large!”

Then they walk around the ranch a little, and the Aussie shows off his herd of cattle. The Texan immediately says, “We have longhorns that are at least twice as large as your cows.”

The conversation almost dies when the Texan sees a herd of kangaroos hopping through the field.

He asks, “And what are those?”

The Aussie replies with an incredulous look, “Don’t you have any grasshoppers in Texas?”


QuotaBills
Dare to dream big. - Unknown

A big book is a big bore. - Callimachus

Have great, secret, big, fat hopes for yourself. - Gloria Vanderbilt

It doesn't take a very big person to carry a grudge. - Unknown

In plain Texas talk, it's 'do the right thing'. - Ross Perot

Don King is a big ... thief, and everyone in this room knows it. - Donald Trump

I also do my own processing, so it means a big commitment in lab time. - Leonard Nimoy

Happiness is having a large, caring, close-knit family in another city. - George Burns

Poor Faulkner, Does he really think big emotions come from big words? - Ernest Hemingway

Many a small thing has been made large by the right kind of advertising. - Mark Twain

You know the good part about all those executions in Texas? Fewer Texans. - George Carlin

Sergio Leone was a big influence on me because of the spaghetti westerns. - Quentin Tarantino

Acting is merely the art of keeping a large group of people from coughing. - Ralph Richardson

We also sleep in separate beds. Hers is in California and mine is in Texas. - Red Skelton

I'm a big laser believer - I really think they are the wave of the future. - Courteney Cox

The landscape of Texas is in all my work. It's that light; it's that sky. - Robert Wilson

Being from Texas, I would say I favor a pair of jeans you can wear some boots with. - Jensen Ackles

Logic, like whiskey, loses its beneficial effect when taken in too large quantities. - Lord Dunsany

We'll have a big bowl of spaghetti and a plate of some of that veal scallopeepee. - Archie Bunker

Make the lie big, make it simple, keep saying it, and eventually they will believe it. - Adolf Hitler

No matter how big and bad you are, when a 2-year-old hand you a toy phone, you answer it. - Unknown

Some see the glass as half-empty, some see the glass as half-full. I see the glass as too big. - George Carlin

There is not one big cosmic meaning for all. There is only the meaning we each give to our life. - Anais Nin

I'm from Texas, and one of the reasons I like Texas is because there's no one in control. - Willie Nelson

I don't think I'm a celebrity. I'm just a guy from east Texas who loves cars and airplanes. - Carroll Shelby

It isn't the big pleasures that count the most; it's making a great deal out of the little ones. - Jean Webster

In a litigation-happy society, clear agreements often prevent small disagreements form becoming big ones. - Harvey Mackay

Money won't buy happiness, but it will pay the salaries of a large research staff to study the problem. - Bill Vaughan

I'm a big fan of the Irish accent. After a couple of drinks, I start to get a bit of an Irish lilt, too. - Emily Ratajkowski

I am really honored frankly to have played such a big role in hopefully, hopefully, getting rid of this issue. - Donald Trump

What sounds to you like a big load of trashy noise... is in fact... the brilliant music of a genius... myself. - Iggy Pop

Inherited wealth is a big handicap to happiness. It is as certain death to ambition as cocaine is to morality. - William K Vanderbilt

I'll tell you, it's Big Business. If there is one word to describe Atlantic City, it's Big Business. - Donald Trump

The reason gas prices are so high is because the oil is in Texas and Oklahoma and all the dipsticks are in Washington. - Yakov Smirnoff

What the insurance companies have done is to reverse the business so that the public at large insures the insurance companies. - Gerry Spence

The perfect date for me would be staying at home, making a big picnic in bed, eating Wotsits and cookies while watching cable TV. - Kim Kardashian

The Muslim Prophet Mohammed was a big believer in charity and firmly established helping those in need as a basis of the religion. - Richard Engel

I am good, but not an angel. I do sin, but I am not the devil. I am just a small girl in a big world trying to find someone to love. - Marilyn Monroe

I'm very anxious to see who the fans choose for their favorite finalist. Their decision could have a big effect on my ultimate decision. - Donald Trump

Your surfing can get better on every turn, on every wave you catch. Learn to read the ocean better. A big part of my success has been wave knowledge. - Kelly Slater


see also   Farm  Section
Everything Is Bigger In Texas
My Daughter & My Money
Survivor - Texas Style (2013)
Texas Bank Security
Texas Office Chair
Texas Wink
Why We Live in Texas

 

GPS Directions

Secret Exit

Clippendales

Starborks

Post-Apocalyptical Section

Hide And Sikh

Yoga Pants

Really Good Day

Be Someone

My Time

Algebra Relationship

Mask Shortage

Exit Not Found

Early Shave

Dementia Purse

Quarantine Response

Braided Horse Tail

Government Debt

Statue Tug Of War

Kiosk Hours
Full list of creditsFacebookTwitterDiggStumbleUponDelicious

31-Mar-2020