Almost Everything’s Bigger in Texas

Home on the Range for an Aussie


A Texan farmer goes to Australia for a vacation and meets an Aussie farmer.

The Aussie shows off his big wheat field and the Texan says, “Oh? We have wheat fields that are at least twice at large!”

Then they walk around the ranch a little, and the Aussie shows off his herd of cattle. The Texan immediately says, “We have longhorns that are at least twice as large as your cows.”

The conversation almost dies when the Texan sees a herd of kangaroos hopping through the field.

He asks, “And what are those?”

The Aussie replies with an incredulous look, “Don’t you have any grasshoppers in Texas?”


QuotaBills
Deluxe: Mediocre in a big way. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Worry gives a small thing a big shadow. - Swedish Proverb

Never be too big to look up to someone. - Unknown

I am the literary equivalent of a Big Mac and Fries. - Stephen King

I'm just the smallest dot in a big map of human history. - Ben Casnocha

The Blues and jazz will live forever, so will the Delta and the Big Easy. - Jack Nicholson

You know the good part about all those executions in Texas? Fewer Texans. - George Carlin

Figuring out what the next big trend is tells us what we should focus on. - Mark Zuckerberg

The world is big and I want to have a good look at it before it gets dark. - John Muir

Your heaviest artillery will be your will to live. Keep that big gun going. - Norman Cousins

Two armies that fight each other is like one large army that commits suicide. - Henri Barbusse

The Irish and British, they love satire, it's a large part of the culture. - Ben Nicholson

If what you did yesterday still looks big to you, you haven't done much today. - Elbert Hubbard

I am who I am: an Irish Catholic kid, working class from Long Island. And I made it big. - Bill O'Reilly

If I had an ego as big as the Eiffel Tower, would I have won this many collective trophies? - Zlatan Ibrahimovic

If a man's from Texas, he'll tell you. If he's not, why embarrass him by asking? - John Gunther

Some folks look at me and see a certain swagger, which in Texas is called 'walking.' - George W. Bush

I came from a big family. As a matter of fact, I never got to sleep alone until I was married. - Lewis Grizzard

Some see the glass as half-empty, some see the glass as half-full. I see the glass as too big. - George Carlin

Do I contradict myself? Very well, then I contradict myself; I am large, I contain multitudes. - Walt Whitman

I'm from Texas, and one of the reasons I like Texas is because there's no one in control. - Willie Nelson

For me, part of one my big movements is building authentic street environments for skateboarding. - Rob Dyrdek

Bond reflected that good Americans were fine people and that most of them seemed to come from Texas. - Ian Fleming

I saw a sign: "Rest Area 25 Miles". That's pretty big. Some people must be really tired. - Steven Wright

The most satisfying thing in life is to have been able to give a large part of one's self to others. - Pierre Teilhard de Chardin

In a litigation-happy society, clear agreements often prevent small disagreements form becoming big ones. - Harvey Mackay

When governments become large, voters cannot exercise close oversight, otherwise known as political power. - Maggie Gallagher

I'm a big crier in general. The right life insurance commercial will take me out for a couple of days. - Ike Barinholtz

Money won't buy happiness, but it will pay the salaries of a large research staff to study the problem. - Bill Vaughan

What sounds to you like a big load of trashy noise... is in fact... the brilliant music of a genius... myself. - Iggy Pop

I'll tell you, it's Big Business. If there is one word to describe Atlantic City, it's Big Business. - Donald Trump

Even if you don't have time for a big workout, stretching in the morning and night really changes your body. - Erin Heatherton

With 'The A-Team,' it was like, 'Alright, I'm going to do a big popcorn movie and see how that feels.' - Joe Carnahan

Life is inherently risky. There is only one big risk you should avoid at all costs, and that is the risk of doing nothing. - Denis Waitley

I still play hockey every now and then, and I still golf. But my biggest exercise is walking my big dog in the park every day. - Michael J. Fox

Happiness always looks small while you hold it in your hands, but let it go, and you learn at once how big and precious it is. - Maxim Gorky

I am good, but not an angel. I do sin, but I am not the devil. I am just a small girl in a big world trying to find someone to love. - Marilyn Monroe

You can imagine me as a kid growing up in redneck Texas with ballet shoes, tucking the violin under my arm. I had to fight my way up. - Patrick Swayze

When you win the World Series, like we did with The Apprentice, you don't make too many changes. The big change is always the cast. - Donald Trump

In small towns as well as large, good people outnumber bad people by 100 to 1. In big towns the 100 are nervous. But in small towns, it's the one. - Paul Harvey


see also   Farm  Section
Everything Is Bigger In Texas
My Daughter & My Money
Survivor - Texas Style (2013)
Texas Bank Security
Texas Office Chair
Texas Wink
Why We Live in Texas

 

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18-May-2022