A Scotsman, carrying a huge suitcase, was riding a London bus for five miles along its route, all the while attempting to avoid the ticket collector. Finally, the conductor managed to corner him and told him to pay up: “You’ve been on for five miles - that’ll be 50p, please, and 10p for your suitcase.”
The Scotsman responded, “I ha’not! I want a, ha’penny fare, I just got on this vera moment.”
They begin to argue, and the ticket collector becomes more and more enraged and finally, as the bus is passing over London Bridge, he grabs the Scotsman’s suitcase, and hurls it out of the bus.
It lands in the river and sinks without a trace. The Scotsman stands shocked for a moment and says to the ticket collector, “Not only are ya trin’ to overcharge me for the ticket - but now you’ve gone a’drowned ma wee boy, Jimmy!”
Hire character. Train skill. - Peter Schutz
Parody: A collection of pears - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Champions train. Losers complain. - Unknown
It is idle to dread what you cannot avoid. - Publilius Syrus
Those who trade liberty for security have neither. - John Adams
Sometimes that light at the end of the tunnel is a train. - Charles Barkley
You often meet your fate on the road you take to avoid it. - French Proverb
The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it. - Dale Carnegie
There is no security in this life. There is only opportunity. - Douglas MacAurthur
Every success is usually an admission ticket to a new set of decisions. - Henry Kissinger
If you train hard, you'll not only be hard, you'll be hard to beat. - Herschel Walker
The light you see at the end of the tunnel is the front of an oncoming train. - David Lee Roth
Fitness needs to be perceived as fun and games or we subconsciously avoid it. - Alan Thicke
I am on a ketos diet so I avoid sugar, dairy products, wheat, grain or pulses. - Puneet Issar
Security is mostly a superstition. Life is either a daring adventure or nothing. - Helen Keller
You can avoid reality, but you cannot avoid the consequences of avoiding reality. - Ayn Rand
There is only one way to avoid criticism: do nothing, say nothing, and be nothing. - Aristotle
Isn't life a collection of weird quizzes with no answers to half the questions? - Pawan Mishra
People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid. - Soren Kierkegaard
I mistrust all systematizers and avoid them. The will to a system is a lack of integrity. - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche
There ain't no man can avoid being born average. But there ain't no man got to be common. - Satchel Paige
Oats: A grain, which in England is generally given to horses, but in Scotland supports the people - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Never let life's hardships disturb you... no one can avoid problems, not even saints or sages. - Nichiren Daishonen
I do not think there is any silver bullet to solving the technology side of the security equation. - John W. Thompson
All my life I've wanted, just once, to say something clever without losing my train of thought. - Robert Breault
By eating many fruits and vegetables in place of fast food and junk food, people could avoid obesity. - David H Murdock
Unlucky: Crossing the street to avoid walking under a ladder and getting hit by a truck full of horseshoes - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
When walking, you see things that you miss in a motor car or on the train. You give your mind space to ponder. - Tom Hodgkinson
Too many people are thinking of security instead of opportunity. They seem to be more afraid of life than death. - James F. Bymes
I'm grateful that I never was that senior athlete who realized she'd done nothing but train all her life. - Clara Hughes
The only security men can have for their political liberty, consists in keeping their money in their own pockets. - Lysander Spooner
One of the endearing things about mathematicians is the extent to which they will go to avoid doing any real work. - Matthew Pordage
If you can't even acknowledge that you have to fix social security, that's not a very good starting point. - Rob Portman
My best security is within the munitions of an immutable Jehovah, where His unalterable promises stand like giant walls of rock. - Charles H Spurgeon
It's like running a marathon race. We train all hours of the day. When you are taking a bath, you are thinking of the flight. - Kalpana Chawla
The very things we wish to avoid, neglect and flee from turn out to be the 'prima materia' from which all real growth comes. - Andrew Harvey
Science is built up with facts, as a house is with stones. But a collection of facts is no more a science than a heap of stones is a house. - Jules H Poincare
The trials in our lives are valuable lessons and those lessons can be used to avoid similar situations in the future or even help someone else. - Neviesh Perry
Do not train boys to learning by force and harshness, but lead them by what amuses them, so that they may better discover the bent of their minds. - Plato
Success in creating AI would be the biggest event in human history. Unfortunately, it might also be the last, unless we learn how to avoid the risks. - Stephen Hawking
Parody: A collection of pears - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Champions train. Losers complain. - Unknown
It is idle to dread what you cannot avoid. - Publilius Syrus
Those who trade liberty for security have neither. - John Adams
Sometimes that light at the end of the tunnel is a train. - Charles Barkley
You often meet your fate on the road you take to avoid it. - French Proverb
The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it. - Dale Carnegie
There is no security in this life. There is only opportunity. - Douglas MacAurthur
Every success is usually an admission ticket to a new set of decisions. - Henry Kissinger
If you train hard, you'll not only be hard, you'll be hard to beat. - Herschel Walker
The light you see at the end of the tunnel is the front of an oncoming train. - David Lee Roth
Fitness needs to be perceived as fun and games or we subconsciously avoid it. - Alan Thicke
I am on a ketos diet so I avoid sugar, dairy products, wheat, grain or pulses. - Puneet Issar
Security is mostly a superstition. Life is either a daring adventure or nothing. - Helen Keller
You can avoid reality, but you cannot avoid the consequences of avoiding reality. - Ayn Rand
There is only one way to avoid criticism: do nothing, say nothing, and be nothing. - Aristotle
Isn't life a collection of weird quizzes with no answers to half the questions? - Pawan Mishra
People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid. - Soren Kierkegaard
I mistrust all systematizers and avoid them. The will to a system is a lack of integrity. - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche
There ain't no man can avoid being born average. But there ain't no man got to be common. - Satchel Paige
Oats: A grain, which in England is generally given to horses, but in Scotland supports the people - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Never let life's hardships disturb you... no one can avoid problems, not even saints or sages. - Nichiren Daishonen
I do not think there is any silver bullet to solving the technology side of the security equation. - John W. Thompson
All my life I've wanted, just once, to say something clever without losing my train of thought. - Robert Breault
By eating many fruits and vegetables in place of fast food and junk food, people could avoid obesity. - David H Murdock
Unlucky: Crossing the street to avoid walking under a ladder and getting hit by a truck full of horseshoes - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
When walking, you see things that you miss in a motor car or on the train. You give your mind space to ponder. - Tom Hodgkinson
Too many people are thinking of security instead of opportunity. They seem to be more afraid of life than death. - James F. Bymes
I'm grateful that I never was that senior athlete who realized she'd done nothing but train all her life. - Clara Hughes
The only security men can have for their political liberty, consists in keeping their money in their own pockets. - Lysander Spooner
One of the endearing things about mathematicians is the extent to which they will go to avoid doing any real work. - Matthew Pordage
If you can't even acknowledge that you have to fix social security, that's not a very good starting point. - Rob Portman
My best security is within the munitions of an immutable Jehovah, where His unalterable promises stand like giant walls of rock. - Charles H Spurgeon
It's like running a marathon race. We train all hours of the day. When you are taking a bath, you are thinking of the flight. - Kalpana Chawla
The very things we wish to avoid, neglect and flee from turn out to be the 'prima materia' from which all real growth comes. - Andrew Harvey
Science is built up with facts, as a house is with stones. But a collection of facts is no more a science than a heap of stones is a house. - Jules H Poincare
The trials in our lives are valuable lessons and those lessons can be used to avoid similar situations in the future or even help someone else. - Neviesh Perry
Do not train boys to learning by force and harshness, but lead them by what amuses them, so that they may better discover the bent of their minds. - Plato
Success in creating AI would be the biggest event in human history. Unfortunately, it might also be the last, unless we learn how to avoid the risks. - Stephen Hawking
see also Nationality & Train Sections
Suitcase Inspection
Welcome To Scotland
 Second Hand Work |  Ostrich Fill Up |  Calory Bomb |  Interuption Charge |  Reach For Your Dreams |
 Perception |  Jeopardy Measuring Cup |  All We Have To Do Is Stand Up |  Vacuum Extender |  BrownEes |
 Chinese Puzzle Car |  Always Give 100% At Work |  Ancient Politician |  My Toaster Is Broken |  Shining Stars |
 Tunnel Face |  The Bugs Are Bad This Year |  Dog Spa |  Ostrich Imprint |  Local Crabs |
29-Jun-2022 |