Atheist Professor

Religious brain child


A college class was led by an atheist professor, and every day he’d stand in front of his class and say, “Have you ever seen God?” to which nobody would answer. Then he’d ask, “Have you ever felt God?” and nobody would answer. Finally he’d ask, “Have you ever heard God?” and, like the other times, nobody would answer. He then would say, “It is obvious that there is no God.”

One day a Christian student had been having an extremely bad day: her car broke down, her mother was sick, her boyfriend was out of town, and she’d gotten a bad grade on one of her exams. She had been fed up with her professor’s little act every morning, so she decided to do something about it.

While the professor stood up at the beginning of class and did his thing, the student had an idea. She got up and said, “Professor, would you mind if I said something?”
He said, “Of course not. This is an expressive classroom, and I think it would be fine if you spoke your mind.”

The girl said to the class, “Have you ever seen our professor’s brain?” and nobody answered. Then she asked, “Have you ever felt our professor’s brain?” and nobody answered. Finally she asked, “Have you ever heard our professor’s brain?” and, like the other times, nobody answered.

She then said, “It is quite obvious that our professor has no brain.”




QuotaBills
By grace we are saved through faith. - Kevin DeYoung

There is no substitute for the Bible. - Henry Halley

Prayer - the last refuge of a scoundrel. - Homer Simpson

God heals, and the doctor takes the fees. - Benjamin Franklin

Directly after God in heaven comes a Papa. - Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart

When God sneezed, I didn't know what to say. - Henny Youngman

God is not interested in your art but, your heart. - Ifeanyi E. Onuoha

It only rains straight down. God doesn't do windows. - Steven Wright

Prayer does not change God, but it changes him who prays. - Soren Kierkegaard

If God wanted us to vote, he would have given us candidates. - Jay Leno

Praise is a rebuke to the man whose conscience alloweth it not. - Eliza Cook

God intends to give us what we need, not what we now think we want. - C S Lewis

Surrender to what is. Let go of what was. Have faith in what will be. - Sonia Ricotti

Be on your guard; stand firm in the faith; be men of courage; be strong. - Bible

Give me a couple of pages of the Bible, and I'll give you a picture. - Cecil B. DeMille

Blessed be Thou, our God and Lord of Hosts, who has not created me a woman. - Jewish Prayer

There is no greater discovery than seeing God as the author of your destiny. - Ravi Zacharias

Cocaine is God’s way of telling you you’re making too much money. - Robin Williams

I always distrust people who know so much about what God wants them to do to their fellows. - Susan B Anthony

Praise from a friend, or censure from a foe,
Are lost on hearers that our merits know. - Homer

Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully as when they do it from religious conviction. - Blaise Pascal

I pay no attention whatever to anybody's praise or blame. I simply follow my own feelings. - Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart

Praise the Lord. Blessed is the man who fears the Lord, who finds great delight in his commands. - Bible

If God had intended for breasts to be seen, He wouldn't have created large woolen pullovers. - Tracey Ullman

If a young person has any idealism at all, it's strongest about the time he finishes college. - Sargent Shriver

When you come to religion, you come to a place. When you come to Jesus Christ, you come to a person. - Ravi Zacharias

You can't let praise or criticism get to you. It's a weakness to get caught up in either one. - John Wooden

Take the first step in faith. You don't have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step. - Martin Luther King, Jr.

Like a great Eastern religion says, it's all about striking a balance between the ping and the pong. - Kelly

Don't poets know it better than others? God can't always be everywhere: and, so, invented mothers. - Edwin Arnold

Prejudice, a dirty word, and faith, a clean one, have something in common: they both begin where reason ends. - Harper Lee

There is but one good; that is God. Everything else is good when it looks to Him and bad when it turns from Him. - C S Lewis

Humor must not professedly teach and it must not professedly preach, but it must do both if it would live forever. - Mark Twain

Human history is the long terrible story of man trying to find something other than God which will make him happy. - C S Lewis

Truth cannot be sacrificed at the alter of a pretended tolerance. All religions, plainly and simply, cannot be true. - Ravi Zacharias

Let us have faith that right makes might, and in that faith, let us, to the end, dare to do our duty as we understand it. - Abraham Lincoln

I don't like to write like God. It is only because you never do it, though, that the critics think you can't do it. - Ernest Hemingway

Babies are bits of stardust, blown from the hand of God. Lucky the woman who knows the pangs of birth, for she has held a star. - Larry Barratto

A calling is simply God's shaping of your burden and beckoning you to your service to him in the place and pursuit of his choosing. - Ravi Zacharias

Charity may be a very short word, but with its tremendous meaning of pure love, it sums up man's entire relation to God and to his neighbor. - Aelred of Rievaulx


see also   Religious  Section
Brain Logic

Ain’t Peter's Place
All Dogs Go To Heaven
An Evening Prayer
Autographed Copy
Biblical Humour
Breakable Postal Package
Catch Up With Jesus
Church Sign Generator
Church Sign Messages
Church Signs
Da End Iss Near
Daily Inspiration
Day of Light and Darkness
Dead Sea Fish
Equal Rights Church
For Your Synths
God’s Little Instructions
Golfing Nun
Halo to the Holy Dog
How To Tweet Others
In-Spired Safety Tip
Job Interview With God
John The Baptist Souvenirs
Letters to God - From Children
New School Prayer
Organ Donor
Please Help My Car
Rabbi Road
Redneck Revenge
Reformed Buddhists
Superior Church
The End Is Near
The Eye of God
The Very First King Size Bed
Wash Away Sins
With The Pope
World’s Oldest Menorah
Youth Pastor’s Last Speech

 

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24-Oct-2020