A college
class was led by an atheist professor, and every day he’d stand in front of his class and say, “Have you ever seen God?” to which nobody would answer. Then he’d ask, “Have you ever felt God?” and nobody would answer. Finally he’d ask, “Have you ever heard God?” and, like the other times, nobody would answer. He then would say, “It is obvious that there is no God.”
One day a Christian student had been having an extremely bad day: her car broke down, her mother was sick, her boyfriend was out of town, and she’d gotten a bad grade on one of her exams. She had been fed up with her professor’s little act every morning, so she decided to do something about it.
While the professor stood up at the beginning of class and did his thing, the student had an idea. She got up and said, “Professor, would you mind if I said something?”
He said, “Of course not. This is an expressive classroom, and I think it would be fine if you spoke your mind.”
The girl said to the class, “Have you ever seen our professor’s brain?” and nobody answered. Then she asked, “Have you ever felt our professor’s brain?” and nobody answered. Finally she asked, “Have you ever heard our professor’s brain?” and, like the other times, nobody answered.
She then said, “It is quite obvious that our professor has no brain.”
He was a wise man who invented God. - Plato
Call on God, but row away from the rocks. - Indian Proverb
Friends are God's apology for relatives. - Hugh Kingsmill
God will forgive me. That's his business. - Heinrich Heine
Follow your heart but take your brain with you. - Unknown
My poems are hymns of praise to the glory of life. - Edith Sitwell
God writes comedy but sometimes has a slow audience. - Garrison Keillor
The atheist religion don't believe in the bible. - Archie Bunker
If God wanted us to vote, he would have given us candidates. - Jay Leno
Praise is a rebuke to the man whose conscience alloweth it not. - Eliza Cook
The Son of God became a man to enable men to become sons of God. - C S Lewis
God gave us our memories so that we might have roses in December. - James M Barrie
If God had wanted me otherwise, he would have created me otherwise. - Johann von Goethe
Sandwich every bit of criticism between two heavy layers of praise. - Mary Kay Ash
Where man sees but withered leaves, God sees sweet flowers growing. - Albert Laighton
I had only a little time left and I didn't want to waste it on God. - Albert Camus
A thorough knowledge of the Bible is worth more than a college education. - Theodore Roosevelt
The grass withers, the flower fades
But the word of our God stands forever. - Isaiah 40:8
If Jesus were living in our culture, he would probably hang out in coffeehouses. - Mark Batterson
Every evening I turn worries over to God. He's going to be up all night anyway. - Mary C. Crowley
Pray as though everything depended on God. Work as though everything depended on you. - Saint Augustine
I have been all things unholy; if God can work through me, He can work through anyone. - St Francis of Assisi
Praise is the weapon God gives you to leverage the negative circumstances of your life. - David Evans
And God took a handful of southerly wind, blew His breath over it and created the horse. - Bedouin Legend
It is the final proof of God's omnipotence that he need not exist in order to save us. - Peter De Vries
You must live with people to know their problems, and live with God in order to solve them. - P.T. Forsyth
The majesty of faith is that it teaches us to see what exists, not merely what catches our attention. - Jonathan Sacks
If you plant yourself in one place and let your roots grow deep, there is no limit to what God can do. - Mark Batterson
Family, religion, friendship... these are the three demons you must slay if you wish to succeed in business. - Mr. Burns
An angel is a spiritual creature created by God without a body for the service of Christendom and the church. - Leo Rosten
God's blessings are dispensed according to the riches of his grace, not according to the depth of our faith. - Max Lucado
I am one of those cliff-hanging Catholics. I don't believe in God, but I do believe that Mary was his mother. - Martin Sheen
It cost God nothing, so far as we know, to create nice things: but to convert rebellious wills cost him crucifixion. - C S Lewis
Stay positive in every situation and everything you do; never stop trying. Have faith, don't stop due to failure. - Anurag P Ray
The Brain is a wonderful organ. It starts working the moment you get up and does not stop until you get into the office. - Robert Frost
Question everything. Your love, your religion, your passion. If you don't have questions, you'll never find answers. - Colleen Hoover
God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believed in him should not perish, but have everlasting life. - John 3:16
Some keep the Sabbath going to Church
I keep it, staying at Home
With a Bobolink for a Chorister
And an Orchard for a Dome - Emily Dickinson
For you will certainly carry out God's purpose, however you act, but it makes a difference to you whether you serve like Judas or like John. - C S Lewis
see also Religious Section
Brain Logic
Ain’t Peter's Place
All Dogs Go To Heaven
An Evening Prayer
Autographed Copy
Biblical Humour
Breakable Postal Package
Catch Up With Jesus
Church Sign Generator
Church Sign Messages
Church Signs
Da End Iss Near
Daily Inspiration
Day of Light and Darkness
Dead Sea Fish
Equal Rights Church
For Your Synths
God’s Little Instructions
Golfing Nun
Halo to the Holy Dog
How To Tweet Others
In-Spired Safety Tip
Job Interview With God
John The Baptist Souvenirs
Letters to God - From Children
New School Prayer
Organ Donor
Please Help My Car
Rabbi Road
Redneck Revenge
Reformed Buddhists
Superior Church
The End Is Near
The Eye of God
The Very First King Size Bed
Wash Away Sins
With The Pope
World’s Oldest Menorah
Youth Pastor’s Last Speech
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