Learn Chinese In 5 Minutes!

Use your best Chinese accent when translating English to Chinese


LESSON  ONE

What you 1 from me?

[Lim Ah Lek was asked to make a sentence using 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9 and 10. Not only did he do it 1 to 10, he did it again from 10 back to 1. This is what he came up with....]

“1 day I go 2 climb up a 3 outside a house to pee. But couple saw me, so I panic and 4 down. The man rush out and wanted to 5 with me. I run until I fall 6 and throw up. So I go into 7 eleven and grab some 8 to throw at him. Then I took a 9 and try to stab him. 10 God he run away. So, I put the 9 back and pay for the 8 and left 7 eleven. Next day, I call my boss and say I am 6. He said 5, tomorrow also no need to come back 4 work. He also ask me to climb a 3 and jump down. I don't understand, I so nice 2 him but I don't know what he 1.”

LESSON  TWO

• Ah Tink Yu Fa Ni!:   “You have a good sense of humour!”
• Ai Bang Mai Ne:  “I bumped into the coffee table”
• Ai No Pei:  “I got this for free”
• Chin Tu Fat:  “Have you considered a face lift?”
• Dum Gai:   “A stupid or dubm person”
• Dung On Mai Shu:   “I stepped in shog dit”
• Fat He:   “An unattractive person”
• Gun Pao Der:   “An ancient Chinese invention”
• Hao Long Wei Ting:   “When is the bus due?”
• Hia Dei Kum:   “They have arrived”
• Hu Flung Dung:   “Which one of you fertilised the field?”
• Hu Yu Hai Ding:   “Are you harbouring a fugitive?”
• Jan Ne Ka Sun:   “A former late night talk show host”
• Kum Hia Nao:   “I'd like to talk to you ASAP”
• Lao Ze:   “Not very good”
• Lao Ze Sho:   “Obnoxious Fiance”
• Lei Ying Loh:   “Keep out of sight”
• Lei Tsho:   “Midnight television programme”
• Lin Ching:   “An illegal execution”
• Ming Toy:   “Plaything belonging to ancient emperor”
• Moon Lan Ding:   “One small step for man”
• Ne Ahn:   “A lighting fixture used in advertising signs”
• No Bai Nut Ding:   “Your price is too high”
• Noh Pah King:   “Tow-away zone”
• Noh Tsmo King:   “Cigarettes are hazardous to health”
• Noh Wei Ding:   “Keep out of the pond”
• Shai Gai:   “A bashful person”
• Shu Man Go:   “Your body odour is offensive”
• Sum Ting Wong:   “That's not right”
• Tai Ni Bei Bi:   “A premature infant”
• Tai Ni Po Ni:   “A small horse”
• Ten Ding Ba:   “Serving drinks to people”
• Wan Bum Lung:   “A person with TB”
• Wah Shing Kah:   “Cleaning the family car”
• Wai Go Nao:   “Do you really have to leave?”
• Wai So Dim:   “Who turned off the light?”
• Wai Tu Soon:   “A man ahead of his time”
• Wai Yu Kum Nao:   “I thought the meeting was next week”
• Wai Yu Mun Ching:   “I thought you were on a diet?”
• Wai Yu Shao Ting:   “There is no reason to raise your voice”
• Wai Yu Sing Dum Song:   “You know the lyrics to the Macarena?”
• Wai Yu So Tan?:   “Did you go to the beach?”
• Yu Mai Te Tan:   “Your vacation in Hawaii agreed with you”
• Yu So Dim:   “You aren't very bright”
• Yu Stin Ki Pu:   “Your body odour is offensive”


QuotaBills
Humor is a universal language. - Joel Goodman

Dance is the hidden language of the soul. - Martha Graham

o be a good loser is to learn how to win. - Carl Sandburg

A proverb is to speech what salt is to food. - Arabic Proverb

It is better to know how to learn than to know. - Dr. Seuss

China is a big country, inhabited by many Chinese. - Charles de Gaulle

Bulldozing: Going to sleep during a political speech. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Drawing on my fine command of language, I said nothing. - Robert Benchley

Learn to work harder on yourself than you do on your job. - Jim Rohn

Learning is a treasure that will follow its owner everywhere. - Chinese Proverb

The English winter - ending in July, to recommence in August. - Lord Byron

Continue to learn and challenge yourself. The hard work will pay off. - Unknown

If you're a good numbers person, you're a bad language person. - Frank Luntz

A man must learn to endure patiently what he cannot avoid conveniently. - Michel de Montaigne

Kids: they dance before they learn there is anything that isn't music. - William Stafford

Civilization - a heap of rubble scavenged by scrawny English Lit. vultures. - Malcolm Muggeridge

Learn from yesterday, live for today, look to tomorrow, rest this afternoon. - Charles M. Schulz

If you hold a cat by the tail you learn things you cannot learn any other way. - Mark Twain

You can learn many things from children. How much patience you have, for instance. - Franklin P. Adams

There's nothing like an English weirdo. We have the best nutters in the world. - Sharon Osbourne

Learn to say "no" to the good so you can say "yes" to the best. - John C Maxwell

You don't learn to walk by following rules. You learn by doing and falling over. - Richard Branson

Speak when you're angry and you'll make the best speech you'll ever regret. - L.J. Peter

The funniest line in English is "Get it?" When you say that, everyone chortles. - Garrison Keillor

When my friends and I played cowboys and Indians, I was always the Chinese railroad worker. - Robin Williams

I never made a mistake in grammar but once in my life, and as soon as I done it. I seen it. - Carl Sandburg

Every St. Patrick's Day every Irishman goes out to find another Irishman to make a speech to. - Unknown

Music is the language of the spirit. It opens the secret of life bringing peace, abolishing strife. - Kahlil Gibran

Ideas are like rabbits. You get a couple and learn how to handle them, and pretty soon you have a dozen. - John Steinbeck

The trouble with quotes about death is that 99.999 percent of them are made by people who are still alive. - Joshua Bruns

I alone of English writers have consciously set myself to make music out of what I may call the sound of sense. - Robert Frost

Most people would learn from their mistakes if they weren't so busy trying to place the blame on someone else. - Unknown

Since people are going to be living longer and getting older, they'll just have to learn how to be babies longer. - Andy Warhol

Every dad, if he takes time out of his busy life to reflect upon his fatherhood, can learn ways to become an even better dad. - Jack Baker

An organization's ability to learn, and translate that learning into action rapidly, is the ultimate competitive advantage. - Jack Welch

Two may talk together under the same roof for many years, yet never really meet; and two others at first speech are old friends. - Mary Catherwood

All worthwhile men have good thoughts, good ideas, and good intentions, but precious few of them ever translate those into action. - John Hancock Field

I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks? - George Carlin

I'll love you, dear, I'll love you till China and Africa meet and the river jumps over the mountain and the salmon sing in the street. - W H Auden

What brought me into the TV business is what keeps me here and happy. You can learn something new every day if you have a really positive attitude. - Katie Couric


see also   Confucius,  Daffynitions  &  Language  Sections
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Chinese Law School
Chinese Proverbs
Chinese Shoelusion
Chinese Sudoku
Chinese to English Translation
Chu Your Food Well
Fortune Cookies - In Bed
Fuxing Lu
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15-Jun-2021