Do You Drive A Cataract?

Optometrist-required translation


A Japanese tourist went to a Canadian eye Doctor. After an examination, the Doctor said, “You have a cataract.”

The Japanese tourist shook his head. “Oh no. I have a Rincoln!”


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Who can blind lover's eyes? - Virgil

Logic is in the eye of the logician. - Gloria Steinem

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. - Unknown

Surgery is the cry of defeat in medicine. - Martin H. Fischer

Out of my sight! Thou dost infect my eyes. - William Shakespeare

Nurses are the hospitality of the hospital. - Carrie Latet

An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind. - Mahatma Gandhi

An eye for an eye only leads to more blindness. - Margaret Atwood

Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener. - Paula Deen

After two days in hospital I took a turn for the nurse. - WC Fields

The soul would have no rainbow if the eyes had no tears. - Indian Proverb

I'm gonna keep a beagle-eye on you the whole weekend. - Archie Bunker

Many are the starrs I see, but in my eye no starr like thee. - English Saying

Menopause in progress: go around and do not make eye contact. - Unknown

Ice Water? Get some Onions - that'll make your eyes water! - Groucho Marx

I've kissed so many women I can do it with my eyes closed. - Henny Youngman

Look a pig in its eyes, and understand the truth behind bacon. - Mango Wodzak

If a man puts out the eye of an equal, his eye shall be put out. - Hammurabi

I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body. - Winston Bennett

If you want to lead the people, you must first speak to their eyes. - Napoleon Bonaparte

You can't depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus. - Mark Twain

I have looked into your eyes with my eyes. I have put my heart near your heart. - Pope John XXIII

Seek the wisdom of the ages, but look at the world through the eyes of a child. - Ron Wild

Being born with a pair of beady eyes was the best thing that ever happened to me. - Lee van Cleef

Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off the goal. - Henry Ford

I got the bill for my surgery. Now I know what those doctors were wearing masks for. - James H. Boren

You could see there was blood coming out of her eyes. Blood coming out of her wherever. - Donald Trump

There are no seven wonders of the world in the eyes of a child. There are seven million. - Walt Streightiff

What a blessing it would be if we could open and shut our ears as easily we do our eyes. - Georg C. Lichtenberg

I have only one eye, I have a right to be blind sometimes... I really do not see the signal! - Horatio Nelson

The only real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes but in having new eyes. - Marcel Proust

To my eye, women get sexier around 35. They know a thing or two, and knowledge is always alluring. - Pierce Brosnan

Do not look down upon any Muslim, for even the most inferior believer is great in the eyes of God. - Abu Bakr

Get thee glass eyes;
And, like a scurvy politician, seem
To see the things thou dost not. - William Shakespeare

Be good, keep your feet dry, your eyes open, your heart at peace, and your soul in the joy of Christ. - Thomas Merton

The only equipment lack in the modern hospital? Somebody to meet you at the entrance with a handshake! - Martin H. Fischer

What your mind sees when you close your eyes marks the entrance to an endless universe: your imagination. - Stephen Helmes

The key to a better life isn't always a change of scenery. Sometimes it simply requires opening your eyes. - Richelle E. Goodrich

When I first open my eyes upon the morning meadows and look out upon the beautiful world, I thank God I am alive. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter into the kingdom of God. - Mark 10:25

That's the kind of luck poor Mr. Lincoln had the night he went to the movies, and he sat in John Wilkes' booth. - Archie Bunker

You must mind and not lower the Church in people's eyes by seeming to be frightened about it for such a little thing. - George Eliot

What was most significant about the lunar voyage was not that men set foot on the moon but that they set eye on the earth. - Norman Cousins

You write to become immortal, or because the piano happens to be open, or you've looked into a pair of beautiful eyes. - Robert Schumann

The space in a needle's eye is sufficient for two friends, but the whole world is scarcely big enough to hold two enemies. - Solomon Ibn Gabirol

Nothing contributes so much to tranquilize the mind as a steady purpose - a point on which the soul may fix its intellectual eye. - Mary Shelley

Fearlessness requires attention and receptivity - it takes focus to stand in the still eye of a tornado and not be swept away by it. - Susan Piver

If a train is coming at you, closing your eyes won't save you... but if you look right at it, you at least have a chance to jump. - Andrew Vachss

I've never been able to grow an organ back," Lana said. "Last time I tried... Let's just hope you don't end up with whip eyes. - Michael Grant

Those who speak of progression but are afraid of change are self-repressed and therefore unable to reach any further than their eyes can already see. - Criss Jami


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15-Nov-2019