Pessimists’ Annual Meeting
Don’t Expect Much!

Members of the Benevolent and Loyal Order of Pessimists (BLOP) are preparing for their annual meeting in Iowa City but they do not expect much.

“Very little is on the agenda this year,” said Mr Jack Duval, spokesman for the pessimists.

“The only constants we can see at this point are death, taxes and a Republican in the White House.”

The 17-year-old group meets at a secret location in Iowa City each year to spread its brand of dark attitudes. The meetings are held at places that have been burned to the ground, gone out of business or even knocked down.

“We feel that pessimism is realism and we need an organisation like ours to be an antidote for the rose-coloured optimism that makes people very unhappy,” Mr. Duval said.

“We are very happy because 90 per cent of the time we’re right and 10 per cent of the time, we’re pleasantly surprised.”

Pessimists from 14 states and parts of Canada are expected to attend the weekend gathering.

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