Love Dress

How not to attract your spouse


A woman stopped by unannounced at her recently married son’s house. She rang the doorbell and walked in. She was shocked to see her daughter-in-law lying on the couch, totally naked. Soft music was playing; the aroma of perfume filled the room.

“What are you doing?” she asked.

“I’m waiting for my husband to come home from work,” the daughter-in-law answered.

“But you’re naked!” the mother-in-law exclaimed.

“This is my love dress,” the daughter-in-law explained.

“Love dress? But you’re naked!”

“My husband loves me to wear this dress,” she explained. “It excites him to no end. Every time he sees me in this dress, he instantly becomes romantic and ravages me for hours on end. He can’t get enough of me.”

The mother-in-law left. When she got home, she undressed, showered, put on her best perfume, dimmed the lights, put on a romantic CD and laid on the couch! Waiting for her husband to arrive. Finally her husband came home. He walked in and saw her laying there so provocatively.

“What are you doing?” he asked.
“This is my love dress,” she whispered, sensually.
“Needs ironing, what’s for dinner?”


QuotaBills
Love me, love my dog. - English Proverb

I like perfume and flowers. - Donatella Versace

Hatred is blind, as well as love. - Oscar Wilde

I set off, off to kill the man I love. - Richelle Mead

Love in its essence is spiritual fire. - Emanuel Swedenborg

Love is blind; friendship closes its eyes. - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

Forget love - I'd rather fall in chocolate! - Unknown

Love is what you've been through with somebody. - James Thurber

A Canadian is somebody who can make love in a canoe. - Margaret Lally

I just love Chinese food. My favorite dish is number 27. - Clement Attlee

Whatever you do, stamp out abuses, and love those who love you. - Voltaire

A very small degree of hope is sufficient to cause the birth of love. - Stendhal

I have decided to stick with love. Hate is too great a burden to bear. - Martin Luther King, Jr.

The human heart is a strange vessel. Love and hatred can exist side by side. - Scott Westerfeld

Always it's Spring,and everyone's in love and flowers pick themselves. - e e cummings

The hunger for love is much more difficult to remove than the hunger for bread. - Mother Teresa

Greater love has no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends. - Jesus

Being in love with yourself means never having to say you've got a headache. - Ellie Laine

People love me. And you know what, I have been very successful. Everybody loves me. - Donald Trump

The firsts go away - first love, first baby, first kiss. You have to create new ones. - Sarah Jessica Parker

Love doesn't make the world go 'round. Love is what makes the ride worthwhile. - Franklin P. Jones

A consultant is a man who knows 147 ways to make love, but doesn't know any women. - Unknown

A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person. - Mignon McLaughlin

I love working in Canada. The ovation is great. It makes me feel like I'm the top dog. - Owen Hart

The romantic idealism of my youth has been replaced with realism and hard work at what I love. - Monique Roffey

Chocolate symbolizes, as does no other food, luxury, comfort, sensuality, gratification, and love. - Karl Petzke

Bart, with $10,000, we'd be millionaires! We could buy all kinds of useful things like... love! - Homer Simpson

Would I rather be feared or loved? Easy - both. I want people to be afraid of how much they love me. - Michael Scott

I love running. I’m not into marathons, but I am into avoiding problems at an accelerated rate. - Jarod Kintz

Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you can never tell. - Joan Crawford

The foundation stones for a balanced success are honesty, character, integrity, faith, love and loyalty. - Zig Ziglar

It's useless to hold a person to anything he says when he's in love, drunk or running for office. - Shirley Maclaine

Yoga is really trying to liberate us from shame about our bodies. To love your body is a very important thing. - Rodney Yee

Love is an ideal thing, marriage is a real thing. A confusion of the real with the ideal never goes unpunished. - Johann Wolfgang Goethe

If we would build on a sure foundation in friendship, we must love friends for their sake rather than for our own. - Charlotte Bronte

But here's what I've learned in this war, in this country, in this city: to love the miracle of having been born. - Oriana Fallaci

I love cookies baking. During the winter, they have these candles that smell like cookies, and I always buy like a hundred of them. - Jared Padalecki

I am good, but not an angel. I do sin, but I am not the devil. I am just a small girl in a big world trying to find someone to love. - Marilyn Monroe

People are so shocked when they find... out I am Protestant. I am Presbyterian. And I go to church, and I love God, and I love my church. - Donald Trump

I love power. But it is as an artist that I love it. I love it as a musician loves his violin, to draw out its sounds and chords and harmonies. - Napoleon Bonaparte


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11-Dec-2019