Job Interview With God

George Bush, Barack Obama and Donald Trump at the Pearly Gates

After passing on, George Bush, Barack Obama and Donald Trump are going for a job interview with God.

God asks Bush, “What do you believe in”?
Bush replies, “I believe in a free economy, a strong America, The American nation and so on ...”
God is impressed by Bush and tells him, “Great, come sit in the chair on my right.”

God goes to Obama and asks, “What do you believe in?”
Obama replies, “I believe in democracy, helping the poor, world peace, etc. .... ”
God is really impressed by Obama and tells him, “Well done, come sit in the chair on my left.”

Finally, God asks Trump, “What do you believe in?”
Trump replied, “I believe you’re sitting in my chair.”



QuotaBills
The dog is the god of frolic. - Henry Ward Beecher

You cannot serve God and Mammon. - Bible

God heals, and the doctor takes the fees. - Benjamin Franklin

In politics an absurdity is not a handicap. - Napoleon Bonaparte

To God, thy country, and thy friend be true. - Bill Vaughan

A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush. - English Proverb

Politics is just show business for ugly people. - Jay Leno

God is in my head, but the devil is in my pants. - Jonathan Winters

Without a doubt, it is the land God gave to Cain. - Mordecai Richler

I never saw anything funnier than Texas politics. - Molly Ivins

I should not believe in a God who does not dance. - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

God is always on the side of the strongest battalion. - Voltaire

War is God's way of teaching Americans geography. - Ambrose Bierce

What I believe in my heart must make sense in my mind. - Ravi Zacharias

Self-government won't work without self-discipline. - Paul Harvey

Before God we are all equally wise - and equally foolish. - Albert Einstein

God may forgive your sins, but your nervous system won't. - Alfred Korzybski

We have the best government in the world... that money can buy. - Mark Twain

I can't believe that God put us on this earth to be ordinary. - Lou Holtz

The best place to seek God is in a garden. You can dig for him there. - George Bernard Shaw

Government can't give us anything without depriving us of something else. - Henry Hazlitt

To lodge all power in one party and keep it there is to insure bad government. - Mark Twain

In the beginning, God created man, but seeing him so feeble, He gave him the cat. - Warren Eckstein

Personally, I'm against political jokes. Too often they get elected to office. - Henny Youngman

There are other ways of recognizing the existence of God, through nature for instance. - Billy Graham

In the first place God made idiots. This was for practice. Then He made school boards. - Mark Twain

My brother Bob doesn't want to be in government - he promised Dad he'd go straight. - John F Kennedy

I believe in loyalty: I think when a woman reaches an age she likes, she should stick to it. - Eva Gabor

Music is an agreeable harmony for the honor of God and the permissible delights of the soul. - Johann Sebastian Bach

She believed, of course... because without something to believe in, life would be intolerable. - Rosamunde Pilcher

He knows nothing; and he thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career. - George Bernard Shaw

If God had intended for breasts to be seen, He wouldn't have created large woolen pullovers. - Tracey Ullman

I must study politics and war that my sons may have the liberty to study mathematics and philosophy. - John Adams

The chicken probably came before the egg because it is hard to imagine God wanting to sit on an egg. - Unknown

Politics: Poli, a Latin word meaning "many"; and tics, meaning "bloodsucking creatures." - Robin Williams

Sometimes a man just can't satisfy all of a woman's desires. Which is why God invented dental floss. - Unknown

When I first open my eyes upon the morning meadows and look out upon the beautiful world, I thank God I am alive. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Sometimes the very presence of God is barred by our presuppositions and our intense and constant desire for triumph. - Ravi Zacharias

One lesson you better learn if you want to be in politics is that you never go out on a golf course and beat the President. - Lyndon B. Johnson

If I'm losing balance in a pose, I stretch higher and God reaches down to steady me. It works every time, and not just in yoga. - T. Guillemets


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21-Oct-2020