Redneck Christmas Deer Hunt

Santa's Guh-nomes - Archie Bunker

Shoot folly as it flies. - Alexander Pope

Hunters do it with a big bang. - Unknown

Never shoot more than you can eat. - Unknown

Donation: A country full of female deer - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

He who has no falcon must hunt with an owl. - Danish Proverb

Old hunters never die, they just stay loaded. - Unknown

If you shoot at mimes, should you use a silencer? - Steven Wright

Rotarians, be patriotic! Learn to shoot yourself. - Unknown

Big shots are only little shots who keep shooting. - Christopher Morley

Hunting: the least honorable form of war on the weak. - Paul Richard

Head Hunter: The person to see if you have lost your head - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Stucco: What a lot of house hunters are getting these days - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I'm going to the North Pole to help out Santa this year. - Jimmy Fallon

Deer hunting would be fine sport, if only the deer had guns. - W S Gilbert

Everyone makes fun of the Redneck until the Zombie Apocalypse. - Unknown

Hunting isn't just something I do. It's part of who I am. - Unknown

When the hares have all been caught, the hunting dogs are cooked. - Laozi

Diploma: 1. Da man dat fixes your pipes; 2. A job-hunting license. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Golf is a game in which you yell fore, shoot six, and write down five. - Paul Harvey

To hunt successfully, you must know your ground, your pack, and your quarry. - K J Parker

You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't. - Jeff Foxworthy

Aren't we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas? You know, the birth of Santa. - Bart Simpson

Though so trifling, the success of our first Buffalo hunt gave us quite a social lift. - Ernest T. Seton

Attitude is everything - shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll be among the stars. - Les Brown

I'm glad I don't have to hunt for my food. I don't even know where Sandwiches live. - Bill Murray

The fabled musk deer searches the world over for the source of the scent which comes from itself. - Ramakrishna

You might be a redneck if your favorite hunting dog has a bigger tombstone than your grandfather. - Jeff Foxworthy

The Christmas season has come to mean the period when the public plays Santa Claus to the merchants. - John Andrew Holmes

In hunting - as in life - sometimes the thing you need most isn't the thing you went looking for. - Unknown

If you turn the imagination loose like a hunting dog, it will often return with the bird in its mouth. - William Maxwell

A critic is someone who never actually goes to the battle, yet who afterwards comes out shooting the wounded. - Tyne Daly

C makes it easy to shoot yourself in the foot; C++ makes it harder, but when you do, it blows away your whole leg. - Bjarne Stroustrup

The fascination of shooting as a sport depends almost wholly on whether you are at the right or wrong end of the gun. - P G Wodehouse

You've probably got a device on you that can shoot decent video, so what's stopping you? Capture and share some moments. - Steve Garfield

It's a good thing we have gravity or else when birds died they'd just stay right up there. Hunters would be all confused. - Steven Wright

Hunters will tell you that a moose is a wily and ferocious forest creature. Nonsense. A moose is a cow drawn by a three-year-old. - Bill Bryson

I could stand in the middle of Fifth Avenue and shoot somebody, and I wouldn't lose any voters, okay? It's, like, incredible. - Donald Trump

Mancation: A man's vacation. Generally includes lots of beer, a Redneck grill, slabs of meat for cooking and a sack of fireworks. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

There is no hunting like the hunting of man, and those who have hunted armed men long enough and liked it, never care for anything else thereafter. - Ernest Hemingway