Alcohol Test

Good wine needs no vine. - French Proverb

Beer speaks. People mumble. - Tony McGee

Payday came and with it beer. - Rudyard Kipling

I work until beer o'clock. - Stephen King

Wine is my favorite 4 letter word. - Unknown

Adventure is the champagne of life. - G K Chesterton

When the wine is in, the wit is out. - English Proverb

Absinthe makes the heart grow fonder. - Addison Mizner

You can never buy beer, you just rent it. - Archie Bunker

Beer. Now there's a temporary solution. - Homer Simpson

Wine improves with age. I improve with wine. - Unknown

Milk without fat is like nonalcoholic Scotch. - Andy Rooney

Wine is the most civilized thing in the world. - Ernest Hemingway

Beer, it's the best damn drink in the world. - Jack Nicholson

Music is the wine that fills the cup of silence. - Robert Fripp

What whiskey will not cure, there is no cure for. - Irish Proverb

I should never have switched from Scotch to martinis. - Humphrey Bogart

Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy. - Benjamin Franklin

It was 2:00 p.m., too early for wine but not for chocolate. - Andrea Hurst

Some call it Cocktail Hour. To me, it's a support group. - Unknown

I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already. - Tommy Cooper

Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world. - Wilhelm II

Drinking rum before noon makes you a pirate, not an alcoholic. - Unknown

I never drank anything stronger than beer before I was twelve. - WC Fields

Memorial services are the cocktail parties of the geriatric set. - Ralph Richardson

I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me. - Winston Churchill

We are all mortal until the first kiss and the second glass of wine. - Eduardo Galeano

Men are like wine. Some turn to vinegar, but the best improve with age. - Pope John XXIII

A raise is like a martini: it elevates the spirit, but only temporarily. - Dan Seligman

Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the Bible says love your enemy. - Frank Sinatra

In 1969 I gave up women and alcohol - it was the worst 20 minutes of my life. - George Best

In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria. - Ben Franklin

I imagine hell like this: Italian punctuality, German humour and English wine. - Peter Ustinov

One of the disadvantages of wine is that it makes a man mistake words for thoughts. - Samuel Johnson

Logic, like whiskey, loses its beneficial effect when taken in too large quantities. - Lord Dunsany

I love to sing, and I love to drink scotch. Most people would rather hear me drink scotch. - George Burns

I'm like old wine. They don't bring me out very often - but I'm well preserved. - Rose Kennedy

I don't drink these days. I am allergic to alcohol and narcotics. I break out in handcuffs. - Robert Downey Jr.

Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite and furthermore always carry a small snake. - WC Fields

Every form of addiction is bad, no matter whether the narcotic be alcohol or morphine or idealism. - Carl Jung

I'm making wine at home, but I'm making it out of raisins so it will be aged automatically. - Steven Wright

Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat. - Alex Levine

There is more refreshment and stimulation in a nap, even of the briefest, than in all the alcohol ever distilled. - Ovid

Milk is the drink of babies, tea the drink of women, water the drink of beasts, and wine is the drink of the gods. - John S Blackie

The Bible's full of wine. God ain't got nothing against a little drink to celebrate His Son's birthday with. - Archie Bunker

A fruit is a vegetable with looks and money. Plus, if you let fruit rot, it turns into wine; something Brussels Sprouts never do. - P.J. O'Rourke

A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history - with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila. - Mitch Ratcliffe

In those days the best painkiller was ice. It wasn't addictive, and it was particularly effective if you poured some whiskey over it. - George Burns

Irish whiskey was first developed for its medicinal benefits. It's just lucky for the rest of us that the Irish are such a sickly bunch. - Unknown

The simple act of opening a bottle of wine has brought more happiness to the human race than all the collective governments in the history of earth. - Jim Harrison