Light Christmas Tree

Beer speaks. People mumble. - Tony McGee

Friendship is a sheltering tree. - Samuel Taylor Coleridge

The apple will fall under the apple tree. - Greek Proverb

Beer. Now there's a temporary solution. - Homer Simpson

The righteous will flourish like the palm tree. - Psalms 92:12

Once there was a tree, and she loved a little boy. - Shel Silverstein

A sure cure for seasickness is to sit under a tree. - Spike Milligan

Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy. - Benjamin Franklin

Halloween starts earlier and earlier, just like Christmas. - Robert Englund

The patriot's blood is the seed of Freedom's tree. - Thomas Campbell

Life without love is like a tree without blossoms or fruit. - Khalil Gibran

What two ideas are more inseparable than Beer and Britannia? - Sydney Smith

Native ability without education is like a tree without fruit. - Aristippus

A meal of bread, cheese, and beer constitutes the perfect food. - Queen Elizabeth I

Give me a woman who truly loves beer and I will conquer the world. - Kaiser Willhelm II

I ordered a bed from IKEA and they sent me a tree trunk and a saw. - Eileen Curtright

Keep a green tree in your heart and perhaps a singing bird will come. - Chinese Proverb

In heaven there is no beer...
That's why we drink ours here. - Unknown

If a tree falls in the forest and no one hears, does it make a sound? - Unknown

Zealotry: 1. The enemy of idealism; 2. What a tree salesman likes to do. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Learn not to talk to me. You shake the tree, a leopard's going to fall out. - Kobe Bryant

Mail your packages early, so the Post Office can lose them in time for Christmas. - Johnny Carson

Each has his own tree of ancestors, but at the top of all sits Probably Arboreal. - Robert Louis Stevenson

Someone told me I was immature. Guess who's not allowed in my tree house now? - Unknown

Southerners are so devoted to genealogy that we see a family tree under every bush. - Florence King

If my Valentine you won't be,
I'll hang myself on your Christmas tree. - Ernest Hemingway

Kidney: 1. Midpoint of a child's leg; 2. An organ used to convert beer into urine. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Chocolate comes from coco, which is a tree - that makes it a plant. Chocolate is salad. - Unknown

If 'ifs and buts' were 'candy and nuts', we'd have Christmas every day. - Unknown

The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants. - Thomas Jefferson

They don't make pizza or beer out of celery. And that is all you need to know about celery. - Bill Murray

The difference between a gun and a tree is a difference of tempo. The tree explodes every spring. - Ezra Pound

No matter how carefully you stored the lights last year, they will be snarled again this Christmas. - Robert Kirby

The reason there are so many tree-lined boulevards in Paris is so the German army can march in the shade. - George S Patton

I gave my young nephew a book for Christmas. He's spent six months looking for where to put the batteries. - Milton Berle

A lovely thing about Christmas is that it's compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together. - Garrison Keillor

Did you read about Starbucks? No more "Merry Christmas" at Starbucks. No more. Maybe we should boycott Starbucks. - Donald Trump

As the poet said, "Only God can make a tree" - probably because it's so hard to figure out how to get the bark on. - Woody Allen

Wise sayings are not only for ornament, but for action and business, having a point or edge, whereby knots in business are pierced and discovered. - Francis Bacon

If you sang "99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall" and counted all the numbers mentioned throughout the entire song, it would add up to 14,850. - Joe-kster