Hillary’s First Night As President

White House inspiration for the First Lady


[Hillary Clinton was sworn in today as President. She has disposed of Bill and is spending her first night alone in the White House. She has waited several years for this...]

FIRST NIGHT
Suddenly the ghost of George Washington appears to her...
Hillary says, “How can I best serve my country?”
Washington says, “Never tell a lie.”
“Ouch!” says Hillary, “I don’t know about that.”

SECOND NIGHT
The next night, the ghost of Thomas Jefferson appears...
Hillary says, “How can I best serve my country?”
Jefferson says, “Listen to the people.”
“Ohhh! I really don’t want to do that.”

THIRD NIGHT
On the third night, the ghost of Abe Lincoln appears...
Hillary says, “How can I best serve my country?”
Lincoln says, “Go to the theater.”


QuotaBills
There is no gambling like politics. - Benjamin Disraeli

The gun is not out of Irish politics. - Ian Paisley

Vice-President: A cow's fifth teat. - Harry S Truman

In politics an absurdity is not a handicap. - Napoleon Bonaparte

Intelligence has nothing to do with politics. - Londo Molari

All government, of course, is against liberty. - H L Mencken

Mr. President, I love you, but you're wrong. - Paul Harvey

I'm not a politician. I've only got one face. - Brendan Behan

The art of government is the organization of idolatry. - George Bernard Shaw

The secret of politics? Make a good treaty with Russia. - Otto von Bismarck

In politics, a lie unanswered becomes truth within 24 hours. - Willie Brown

An honest man in politics shines more than he would elsewhere. - Mark Twain

We have the best government in the world... that money can buy. - Mark Twain

Every politician should have been born an orphan and remain a bachelor. - Lady Bird Johnson

Politics is the chloroform of the Irish people, or, rather the hashish. - Oliver St. John Gogarty

The politicians were talking themselves red, white and blue in the face. - Clare Boothe Luce

Bad politicians are sent to Washington by good people who don't vote. - William E. Simon

Government can't give us anything without depriving us of something else. - Henry Hazlitt

Ninety percent of the politicians give the other ten percent a bad reputation. - Henry Kissinger

Frankly, I don't mind not being President. I just mind that someone else is. - Edward Kennedy

I wouldn't run for President. I wouldn't want to move to a smaller house. - Bono

There are no crooked politicians in America. They've legalized their thievery. - Frank Dane

No president who performs his duties faithfully and conscientiously can have any leisure. - James K Polk

I believe there is something out there watching us. Unfortunately, it's the government. - Woody Allen

A little government and a little luck are necessary in life, but only a fool trusts either of them. - P.J. O'Rourke

Good thing we've still got politics in Texas - finest form of free entertainment ever invented. - Molly Ivins

Get thee glass eyes;
And, like a scurvy politician, seem
To see the things thou dost not. - William Shakespeare

Politicians are people who, when they see light at the end of the tunnel, go out and buy some more tunnel. - John Quinton

I don't look for much to come out of government ownership as long as we have Democrats and Republicans. - Kin Hubbard

It is a win-win for the American people, an idea no conventional politician would have the guts to put forward. - Donald Trump

Just because you do not take an interest in politics doesn't mean politics won't take an interest in you. - Pericles (430 B.C.)

In America you can go on the air and kid the politicians,
and the politicians can go on the air and kid the people. - Groucho Marx

Calculating how much carbon is absorbed by which forests and farms is a tricky task, especially when politicians do it. - Donella Meadows

If the government was as afraid of disturbing the consumer as it is of disturbing business, this would be some democracy. - Kin Hubbard

Any American who is prepared to run for president should automatically, by definition, be disqualified from ever doing so. - Gore Vidal

Politics is not a bad profession. If you succeed there are many rewards, if you disgrace yourself you can always write a book. - Ronald Reagan

Politicians get their power too late, and I think that he has inherited an impossible situation in which he is ill-equipped to deal. - Malcolm Muggeridge

Judge: 1. A law student who marks his own examination papers; 2. A lawyer who once knew a politician; 3. A man in a trying position. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Regarded simply as a politician, and compared with the other leading political figures of our time, how clean a smell he has managed to leave behind. - Mahatma Gandhi

Jokes of the proper kind, properly told, can do more to enlighten questions of politics, philosophy, and literature than any number of dull arguments. - Isaac Asimov


see also   Government,  History  &  Politics  Sections
Hillary in 2007:  Democrat Gift
Bill & Hillary in 2009:  Clinton Combo Kitchen Tool Set

America’s Moment of Truth
Bucket of Hillary
Da Queen
Donald Trump White House
First Dog
Happy Scary Halloween
Hillarius Trump
Hillary Hairstyle
Redneck Politician
Vote For Me

 

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Paradigm Shift

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23-Jan-2021