Irish School Demolition

[This is a girl in Ireland who’s making prank calls at the age of 8.
She doesn’t like her school and she wants to get it demolished,
so she goes to a demolition expert and tries to convince him...]

Hello, Inter Core.
Hi, is that the demolition place?
It is, yes.
Could you help me to destroy my school please.
Just bare with me a second...
Hello.
Hi.
What school do you go to?
I go to a school in Dublin.
And you want it demolished?
Yeah. Do you use a big wrecking ball, or how do you knock it down?
A big ball.
Right.
Hold on one wee second please...
Hello.
How are you - my name’s Becky.
Yes.
I have a proposal for ya.
Go ahead.
Are you the demolition man?
Yes.
You’re the top boss, yeah?
Go ahead, what’s the tact?
Hello?
I want you to help me destroy my school.
You want it blown up?
Can you blow it up, or knock it down?
Whatever you want done.
I’ll blow it up, that would be better. Can you make sure that all my teachers are in there when you knock it down?
Don’t know if you’ll get away with that now.
Nobody likes them – they give me extra homework on a Friday and everything.
Where are you calling from?
From Dublin.
What school in Dublin?
The one that’s about to fall down.
There’s a lot of schools in Dublin about to fall down.
And how much would it cost to knock it to the ground?
It depends how big it is.
Give me a ballpark figure.
Croke Park is ainm é [Croke Park is its name (ball park)]
Agus go leor scoile is tigh eile. [And many other schools and houses]
Is this a demolition company or a joe-k factory?
It’s a joe-k factory at the minute... It’s a joe-k factory.
Listen, are you gonna come and knock my school down or what?
Can you FAX me through a photograph or a site plan, or something.
Right, I’ll FAX you through a plan of the school and my teacher’s names.
Yeah – no problem, yeah.
And you just make sure that they’re all in the building when you knock it down.
You put all their names on it – I’ll give you a page for each individual teacher.
Brilliant.
Yeah.
When the school falls down, will it make a crash or a whallop?
It will make a big bang.
Sounds good. Oh listen, I’ll talk to you later, top man.
Good luck, a Chailín ar buile! [crazy girl]
Fill your boots man!
Good luck.
See you after.

QuotaBills
My soul is still Irish. - Ciaran Hinds

Yes, I am an Irish lass through and through. - Erin Andrews

There are not many Irish people playing tennis. - Goran Ivanisevic

Our Irish blunders are never blunders of the heart. - Maria Edgeworth

The Irish are a very popular race - with themselves. - Brendan Behan

I had that stubborn streak, the Irish in me I guess. - Gregory Peck

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God made the Idiot for practice, and then He made the School Board. - Mark Twain

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I come from an Irish Catholic family, and hell-raising is part of the DNA. - Brian Dennehy

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In the first place God made idiots. This was for practice. Then He made school boards. - Mark Twain

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There are only two kinds of people in the world: the Irish and those who wish they were. - Irish Saying

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You learn how to be book smart in school, but you better not forget that you also need to be street smart. - Harvey Mackay

Graduate School: The place where a young scholar goes off his Dad's payroll - and on to his wife's - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

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For my last meal, I'd want an Irish breakfast with soda bread and one of my dad's omelettes with three or four eggs. - Erin O'Connor

I love to play hide and seek with my kid, but some days my goal is to find a hiding place where he can't find me until after high school. - Unknown

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see also Practical Section
Going Green for Ireland
Green Beards
Habby Sin Pad-Riggs Dey!
Irish Alzheimers
Irish Banister Blessing
Irish Bar
Irish Birth Control
Irish Blessings and Sayings
Irish Dock Overboard Oh-Nos
Irish Drink
Irish Exam
Irish Flood
Irish Rugby Fans
Irish Sky Garden Crater
Irish Virgin
Irish Yoga
Irish Weather Forecasting
Leprechaun Treats
Little Leprechaun
St. Patrick’s Day Joe-ks
St. Patrick’s Day Riddles
St. Patrick’s Dog
St. Patrick’s Pot of Gold
Swimming Buddies
The Fert
What’s Under The Kilt?

Irish School Demolition

Is this a demolition company or a joe-k factory?

Why teachers shouldn’t give extra homework on Fridays!

16-May-2022