Redneck Revolver

Shoot folly as it flies. - Alexander Pope

Gun Control: Using both hands - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Force: The weapon of the weak. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A gun gives you the body, not the bird. - Henry David Thoreau

Aim high and you won’t shoot your foot off. - Phyllis Diller

Rotarians, be patriotic! Learn to shoot yourself. - Unknown

Guns have only two enemies - rust and politicians. - Unknown

Hunting: the least honorable form of war on the weak. - Paul Richard

Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope. - George Burns

If you were going to shoot a mime, would you use a silencer? - Steven Wright

I am proud of the fact that I never invented weapons to kill. - Thomas Edison

Is that a gun in your pocket, or are you just glad to see me? - Mae West

Diploma: 1. Da man dat fixes your pipes; 2. A job-hunting license. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The human race has one really effective weapon, and that is laughter. - Mark Twain

Window: 1. A looking-out glass; 2. Place in the truck to hang your guns. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

If you need 100 rounds to kill a deer, maybe hunting isn't your sport. - Elayne Boosler

Your heaviest artillery will be your will to live. Keep that big gun going. - Norman Cousins

You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't. - Jeff Foxworthy

Leadership is intangible, and therefore no weapon ever designed can replace it. - Omar N. Bradley

It is much easier to imagine ghastly new biological weapons than to create them. - Andrew Pollack

Hunting is not a sport. In a sport, both sides should know they're in the game. - Paul Rodriguez

Any gun in the hands of a decent person is no threat to anybody, except bad people. - Charlton Heston

The greatest weapon against stress is our ability to choose one thought over another. - William James

A gun is not a weapon, it’s a tool, like a hammer or a screwdriver or an alligator. - Homer Simpson

Attitude is everything - shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll be among the stars. - Les Brown

You might be a redneck if your favorite hunting dog has a bigger tombstone than your grandfather. - Jeff Foxworthy

In hunting - as in life - sometimes the thing you need most isn't the thing you went looking for. - Unknown

You could say that the paparazzi and the tabloids are sort of the assault weapons of the First Amendment. - Charlton Heston

You see I'm against hunting, in fact I'm a hunt saboteur. I go out the night before and shoot the fox. - Tim Vine

C makes it easy to shoot yourself in the foot; C++ makes it harder, but when you do, it blows away your whole leg. - Bjarne Stroustrup

I am getting to an age when I can only enjoy the last sport left. It is called 'hunting for your spectacles.' - Edward Grey

The fascination of shooting as a sport depends almost wholly on whether you are at the right or wrong end of the gun. - P G Wodehouse

The Supreme Court's only armor is the cloak of public trust; its sole ammunition, the collective hopes of our society. - Irving R. Kaufman

Ideas are far more powerful than guns. We don't allow our enemies to have guns, why should we allow them to have ideas. - Joseph Stalin

Unless a man has considerable skill and reliance in his weapon, he will not remain cool in the presence of dangerous game close by. - Townsend Whelen

You can imagine me as a kid growing up in redneck Texas with ballet shoes, tucking the violin under my arm. I had to fight my way up. - Patrick Swayze

Baseball happens to be a game of cumulative tension but football, basketball and hockey are played with hand grenades and machine guns. - John Leonard

I'd love to see Christ come back to crush the spirit of hate and make men put down their guns. I'd also like just one more hit single. - Tiny Tim

Hypothesis: 1. First thing a Redneck teenager says to his father on the phone; 2. Hippo, horse; thesis, placing: putting something on a horse. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

When I came back to Dublin, I was courtmartialled in my absence and sentenced to death in my absence, so I said they could shoot me in my absence. - Brendan Behan